


Blacktail

by Flantastic



Category: James Bond (Craig movies), James Bond (Movies), James Bond - All Media Types
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Alternate Universe - Slavery, Anal Sex, Angst, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Blow Jobs, Cat Q, Hand Jobs, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Past Rape/Non-con, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-16
Updated: 2016-04-22
Packaged: 2018-05-14 08:58:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 63,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5737567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Flantastic/pseuds/Flantastic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When M loses patience with the way that James Bond conducts himself while out on missions she thinks she has the ideal solution.  She has no idea she's about to change the agent's life forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. i.i

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Only_1_Truth](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Only_1_Truth/gifts).



> Back in October I was lucky enough to bag Only_1_Truth's gorgeous artwork 'CatQ' for the 2015-2016 00Q Reverse Big Bang exchange. As always, there was so much fabulous art to choose from I was really spoilt for choice.
> 
> And now in German (here: http://www.fanfiktion.de/s/5771416c00053a1e320fb1c6/1/Blacktail-by-Flantastic-Ubersetzung-) thanks to the wonderful quartermasters_cheshirecat!

 

 

 

Extract from **Gov.uk/otherkind emacipation** (Nov 2008):

 

_“You can apply for the emancipation of any otherkind legally owned by you and pay for it online. You’ll have to print out a form at the end._

_You must sign and date the form, add any documents or photographs that are needed, and return it for processing.  The form may also be submitted to your local post office._

 

_**Before you start** _

_You’ll need a debit or credit card to use this service._

_You will need to provide proof that the otherkind has belonged to you for a minimum of two years._

_It should take 6 weeks to get confirmation that your application has been accepted.  Your application will be backdated to the day that the necessary paperwork was filed._

_It can take longer if more information is needed or your application hasn’t been filled out correctly.”_

 

Extract from the **Daily Mail** newspaper (Aug 2013):

_“Protesters became embroiled in violent clashes with police today as a demonstration backing a cut in the time required for emancipated otherkind to become free citizens descended into chaos after a rabble-rousing speech by Labour's Michael Sanderson._

_The shadow chancellor had addressed thousands of both human and free otherkind protesters in central London who were calling for a reduction in the three year waiting period after emancipation as they marched through Westminster, cheering and waving flags._

_He told them the government had acted like the human enslavers of old with their antiquated attitudes towards the enslavement of sentient non-humans - and later when the protest came to a dramatic halt outside Downing Street - dozens of officers from the Territorial Support Group moved in and penned in the demonstrators, many of whom were clad all in black, with animal masks representing the various species of enslaved otherkinds, and letting off flares.  Some protesters burst through the police lines and were chased down Whitehall by officers, while chanting: ‘What do we want? Free the slaves. When do we want it? Now.’_

_Several young men appeared to be arrested and were taken by officers into waiting police vans as the protest came to a stop near Victoria station._

_In a statement, Scotland Yard said a 'small group of protesters' had thrown paint outside the Home Office during the chaotic scenes, and confirmed 12 people had been arrested for public order offences.”_

 

~00Q~

 

There were two things that James Bond disliked when checking in with MI6 after a mission that didn’t go smoothly.  The first was being unduly fussed over by the staff in Medical.  The second was receiving a bollocking from M.

He disliked it even more when he had to endure both on the same day.

Medical on its own was bad enough.  He’d been forced to endure three hours of x-rays, scans, tests, prods and pokes only to be told that he was fine.  He’d tried to tell them that before they’d started but apparently when you’d jumped out of a car that was travelling at close to fifty miles an hour people didn’t tend to believe you.  He felt bruised, sure, but it was all in a day’s work as far as James was concerned.  It was nothing that a long hot bath, half a bottle of whiskey and a good fuck wouldn’t remedy.  He thought about all the numbers stored in his private mobile phone and wondered which of his lady (gentlemen?) friends he should try first.  Before all that though, he had to endure a dressing down from the most important lady in his life; M.

He walked into the room outside M’s office and was surprised to see Tanner sitting on reception, apparently manning the desk.  Well, maybe ‘manning’ wasn’t quite the right term James mused, when Tanner wasn’t exactly a man.  Not strictly speaking, anyway.  He strode straight past him, knowing that M was expecting him.  Tanner was busy typing something but he stopped and stood up when he saw James.  James grinned at him and quipped;

“Sit.  Stay.  Who’s a good boy?”

“Very funny Bond.”  Tanner scowled as he followed James into M’s office.  

Tanner was something of an oddity.  Although free ‘otherkinds’ (as they were known) were becoming more common, the vast majority of them were still owned by humans.  A few eyebrows had been raised when M employed a free canin to work as her Chief of Staff; but not Bond’s.  Tanner was good at his job, regardless of how senior his position was, and as far as James was concerned that was all that mattered.

The whole thing with the otherkinds left a bad taste in James’s mouth.  Through some quirk of evolution man and otherkind had developed at largely similar rates.  Mankind had evolved from apes and were the dominant species.  As such, men had subjugated the otherkinds for as long as anyone could remember.   For a while they even enslaved their fellow men, using colour or religion as an excuse.  Slavery of their own kind had long been outlawed and now, in the second decade of the twenty-first century, things were starting to change for otherkinds too.  More and more of them were being freed by their masters.  It was still a divisive subject though.  Many humans thought it was a mistake to give them their freedom, while others (including James) thought that it hadn’t come soon enough.

Even amongst otherkinds there was a strange imbalance in the way that they were treated.  Canins, such as Tanner, were on the whole more likely to be freed.  They were descended from dogs and while they tended to have a slightly more aggressive nature they were fiercely loyal.  It might have been that loyalty that endeared them to humans but Bond thought it was simply because of all the otherkinds, they _looked_ the most human.  Apart from Tanner’s slightly overly-hairy ears you might have mistaken him for a human.  Although James would wager that he probably sported a stubby tail in the seat of those bespoke trousers of his.  Luckily, James had never had cause to test that theory.

Ursins too were more commonly liberated.  Of bear ancestry, they tended to end up in military or security roles.  They were quite similar to vulpins in that respect, although the fox ancestors were, on the whole, much smaller.  There were others who were not so lucky as to fit in so seamlessly though.  Avians were a strange bunch who tended to be fervently religious and live in small enclaves.  While not enslaved to a great degree, they tended not to integrate with society as a whole, eschewing technology in particular.  Ultimately, the otherkind still most likely to be owned by humans were the cat descendants, the felin.  With their large ears, long tails and spirited personalities they were sometimes seen as untrustworthy and flighty.  Throughout history they had been used as slaves and there was even tales of freed otherkinds owning them.

James entered M’s office. She was sitting behind her desk, talking on the phone.  Seeing James and Tanner she indicated the seats in front of her.  Tanner immediately sat down (rather obediently, James thought with a smirk) but rather than join him, James strolled over to M’s liquor cabinet and poured himself a large whiskey.  He downed it in one gulp as he listened to what she was saying.

“I don’t care how careful he is.  He’s fifth in line to our throne and if he insists on getting naked at parties then the photos will eventually leak to the media… No that isn’t a bloody threat it’s a bloody statement of fact.  We have better things to do than track down errant socialites with photographs of him in the altogether!” There was a pause during which she glared at James.  He pointedly refilled his glass and then poured one for her.  “We were lucky this time, next time we may not be.  Tell him to keep his ruddy trousers on!”  She slammed the phone down.  She took the glass from Bond and sipped from it despite the fact it was barely four o’clock in the afternoon.

“Thank you.  That was the Home Secretary.  He’s concerned that he’s had to quash yet another picture of Prince Harry with his cock out.  He was in the military for God’s sake – that’s what young men do!  Pompous prig seems to think it’s the job of Five and Six to chase down every potential leak to the media.”

James sat down and started on his second drink, sipping this one.

“I take it you didn’t call me here to protect the Prince’s modesty?”

“No I sodding well didn’t…”  M threw a file across the desk at him.  “Your last mission was a joke!  There’s a bill in there for the amount of damage you managed to inflict on the airport and surrounding area in Cape Town.  More importantly, I had to spend four hours this morning explaining away your actions to the South African ambassador.”  James went to open his mouth.  She held her finger up.  “Quite frankly, whatever you’re about to say; don’t.  I couldn’t give two shits what your excuse is this time Bond.  You’re doing this on every mission these days.  Your wilful lack of regard for the people and properties of the countries we are trying to protect is totally unacceptable.  I’m utterly sick of it and it ends here.  You are hereby being placed on mandatory leave for the next three months.  During this time I would like you to take a good hard look at yourself and ask yourself whether or not you’re still cut out for this kind of work.  If you can’t function without causing that much destruction then I would question whether I should allow you to function as a Double-O at all!”  She stood up.  “There’s something else.  Tanner, see to it that the car is brought around to the main entrance.  Bond, come with me.”

She tossed back the rest of her drink and led the way out of the office to the nearest lift.  James followed her in silence.  She’d been angry with him before but she seemed furious this time.  He supposed that blowing up the main runway had been a tad excessive but he _had_ managed to stop the terrorist he’d been tracking and recover the stolen uranium.  Still, he reflected, three months off wasn’t too bad.  Maybe he could find a nice cabin on a secluded beach somewhere hot…

The lift doors opened and James was surprised to find himself on the detention level.  M approached the guard on duty.

“How is he?”

“Still making that strange noise they do when they’re upset… when he’s not being a vicious little sod that is.  I haven’t been able to get him to co-operate at all.  He hasn’t eaten anything today.”

He handed M a length of chain with a leather loop at one end and a clip at the other before taking out a Taser from the holster on his belt.  They made their way to an open cell door halfway down the hallway and James followed.  As they got closer to the door James started to hear a low, distressed noise.

“What’s going on?” He asked.  M turned to face him once they’d reached the doorway.

“You have a serious problem Bond.  You’re a selfish bastard.  You’ve spent so long doing your own thing and being allowed to get away with it that you’ve forgotten how to relate to others.  Well, I have the solution.  I’ve got you something that might help you to learn to be a little less self-absorbed.”  James followed her when she went into the cell.

“This is Fortescue.” M said.  “I took the liberty of completing the paperwork.  He’s yours now.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

In the corner of the room, sitting on the bunk, curled up into a ball and pressing himself into the bare stone wall was a felin. He had long, lank black hair, out of which protruded two large silky-black ears that were currently pressed to the sides of his head.  The part of his face that Bond could see over his thick beard was pale and drawn and he seemed swamped in the dirty dark grey duffle coat he wore.  He had on tatty black jeans and his bare feet were cut and bruised.  Every visible inch of him was filthy.

The most striking thing about him was his tail.  It was black like his ears and snaked out from the bottom of his coat before wrapping around his body.  He held the end of it between his hands and brushed the tip to and fro over his lips as if soothing himself.  He rocked forwards and backwards slightly and kept keening a repeated low ‘mmmrow’ sound of distress.

His demeanour suddenly changed when M approached him.  He hissed as she tried to clip the leash onto the D-ring on the collar around his neck.  She moved back quickly as he lashed out at her with a suddenly clawed hand.  The guard swore and went to step forward, brandishing his Taser, but Bond snagged his arm.

“Back off.  Can’t you see he’s terrified?”  James watched as the felin shrank back into his corner and resumed stroking his lips with his tail tip, never taking his eyes off the guard.  He started to tremble.  James was suddenly certain the man hadn’t been kind to the pathetic creature.  He rounded on him.  “Get out.”

The guard looked shocked and looked to M but she simply nodded.

“You heard him.”

All three of them watched him leave before M addressed the felin.

“Q?  This is James.  He’s here to take you home.  You belong to him now.  He’s going to take care of you.”

“I can’t do that!” James insisted.  “I can’t own a fucking felin!  You know how I feel about the whole slavery thing!”

M smiled.  She had a hard, flinty look in her eyes.

“Take him or resign immediately.  And you know what will happen to him if you don’t take him.”

James hesitated and then took the leash when she offered it to him.

“Fine.”

He looked at the shivering creature in front of him, not knowing what the fuck he was going to do with him.

“I’ll leave you two to get acquainted, I’m sure you’ll get along famously.  There’s a car waiting for you by the main entrance when you’re ready.  Tanner’s seen to it that you have the necessary supplies for Q.”

After she left James walked over to him and crouched down.  He didn’t miss the way he flinched.

“My name is Bond.  James Bond.  I think that you must belong to me now.” He spoke softly.  “M called you ‘Q’.  Do you like that?  Do you prefer it to Fortescue?” He nodded slightly and James realised that the animal was much younger than he’d first assumed.  “Q, M wants me to care for you so I’m going to do the best that I can.  I’m going to take you home with me.”  He held out the leash.  “Do you know the law about this?”  Q nodded but whimpered.  Any owned otherkinds found out in public incorrectly collared and leashed could be seized by police and the owners risked being fined.  Non-payment could sometimes result in the otherkind being put down.  James hated the way they were treated like chattels. “You know I need to put this on you before we go outside?”  Q looked pained and whispered a single word;

“ _Hurts_.”

James was about to ask him why and then he saw it.  The collar around the felin’s neck was tight – far too tight – and the skin around it was rubbed raw.

“Fucking hell,” James sighed.  “What did they do to you?”  Q shook his head, tears springing into his eyes.  “Here.” James soothed.  He slowly moved to clip the leash onto Q’s collar and then slid the handle onto his wrist.  He held out his hand.  “Take my hand.  That way I can’t pull on the leash and accidentally hurt you.  When we get to my home I can sort that collar out for you.”  Q smiled, a small, nervous gesture.  It was fleeting but rather wonderful and James caught a glimpse of Q’s sharp little teeth.  He stood up and Q took his hand and followed suit.  Once upright he swayed slightly.  He looked exhausted.  James squeezed his hand gently and led him out of the cell.  “Come on then.  Let’s go home.”

 

 

 

 

 


	2. i.ii

The car dropped them at the entrance to the square that James lived on. Before it drove away he went to the boot to retrieve the small box of things that Tanner had left for Q. Tucking it under his arm he led the felin up the pathway to the block of flats where he lived. Q seemed to be flagging and he moved tiredly, stumbling regularly. James got the feeling that by holding his hand, he was almost helping to hold him up. 

“Not much further. My flat’s on the top floor of that building up ahead. The one with the tall hedges outside.” He looked at Q and saw that he was staring at the ground. “Do you see the one I mean?” 

Q shook his head.

“I’m sorry Sir. I can’t see that far.” He whispered. James paused. 

“How far can you see clearly?”

Q raised his free hand until it was about six inches from his face.

“Shouldn’t you have glasses?” Q nodded miserably. “Do you have any?” He shook his head. James sighed. Another thing for him to sort out. “Don’t worry about it for now. We’ll go into town in the morning and see if we can’t get you some new ones.” Q nodded and followed obediently as James led him into the building. A short ride in the lift later and James was ushering Q into his new home. He led him through to the lounge before setting down the box and unclipping the leash from Q’s collar.

“There is a spare room but it’s piled high with boxes at the moment. I moved in last year but never got around to unpacking properly. Maybe you could help me go through everything and then you could have it as your bedroom.” He turned on the electric fire and when he stood up he saw that Q was standing with end of his tail in his hands again, staring down at it. He looked forlorn.

“Would you like something to eat?” Q looked up and his small smile made another fleeting appearance. He nodded eagerly. “Come on then.” James went through to the kitchen and Q trailed after him. “Sit down.” Q looked around himself and then went to sit on the floor. “No Q. On one of the chairs. I don’t want you sitting on the floor.” He obediently went to a chair at the small table and sat down. He was still fiddling with his tail, brushing it over his lips again and James fought the urge to tell him to stop. Abruptly he hated that self-comforting tic and he hated whoever it was who’d abused the poor creature and left him so cowed and scared that he kept returning to it. He opened the fridge door and scanned the contents. There wasn’t much there. He debated ringing up for takeaway but decided against it. Q seemed exhausted and he wanted to try to get him fed and cleaned up as soon as possible. Waiting an extra hour for food didn’t seem like a good idea. Instead he found some eggs and cheese that were still good and then went to the pantry where he knew there were cartons of long-life milk.

“I don’t have much in.” James explained as he grabbed a bowl and a whisk. “I spend a lot of time working away but I’ve found some eggs. Do you like omelettes?”

Q perked up at the offer and nodded eagerly. James chuckled and set a frying pan on the stove. He set about preparing the snack and received a similar enthusiastic reaction when he offered to add some cheese to it. A few short minutes later he handed Q some cutlery and a plate covered in a large omelette. The felin set to it with gusto, shoveling it into his mouth at an alarming speed.

“Hey, hey.” James said softly. Q looked up guiltily, his loaded fork halfway to his mouth. “No-one is going to take that away from you. Slow down a little, you’ll make yourself ill.” Q looked down and nodded and his next forkful was smaller.

Despite slowing down, Q had still finished his food by the time James had cooked his own meal and sat down. James took several bites before he glanced up and saw the way that Q was staring at his food.

“Are you still hungry?” Q looked bashful but nodded again. James immediately pushed his plate over to him. “You have it. I’ve had enough.” In fact James could have easily finished it but he was sure that Q wouldn’t take the extra food if he thought James still wanted it. He watched him as he ate, wondering when he’d last eaten. The guard at MI6 had said he wouldn’t eat there, despite the fact he must have been starving. James felt proud that Q trusted him enough to accept food from him. As Q was finishing James went through the box of things for him. There wasn’t much but there was enough to get him settled in that night. When Q had finished eating James stood up.

“Come with me.”

He went into the bathroom and Q followed. 

“Get undressed. I’m going to get some tools and see if I can’t get that collar off you. Then we’ll get you cleaned up. Would you rather have a shower or a bath?” 

“A bath please Sir.” Q whispered, “I don’t like showers. My… my ears get full of water.”

James turned on the taps, smiling to himself at Q’s little confession, and put the plug in the bath. He then went into the spare room and found his tool box. Rather than guess at the best tools to remove the collar he took the whole lot into the bathroom. Q was standing by the pile of his clothes dressed in just his underpants. He was thin, painfully thin, even for a felin. His pale skin was peppered with bruises, scrapes and scars from old injuries. His hands were tucked under his chin and he had a hold on his tail again. James tried not to stare as he set down the box and opened it.

“Come on then. Can I see?”

James walked over to him and tilted Q’s head with a gentle hand. The collar was made of a stout leather with metal plating. It was designed to resist simply being sliced off. He tried to slip a finger in behind it but it was too tight. He wondered how Q even managed to swallow with it on. He didn’t want to slide it around to see how it was locked so he moved around to Q’s back. It was then that he noticed the welts. His whole back was covered. Some were old and were the colour of old bruises but others were a fresh and livid pink.

“Oh kitten,” James sighed, not even realising he’d used the term of endearment. “Who did this to you?” Q shivered and whimpered but didn’t answer him. James shifted his attention back to the collar. It was held closed with a heavy padlock. Abruptly changing his plan, he muttered “two minutes” and went to the safe that was hidden in his bedroom’s wardrobe. He came back with his lock picks in his hand. “Here we are,” he muttered as he examined the padlock again. He selected a couple of picks and made short work of the lock. When the bar snapped open with a click Q shivered.

“There we go.” James said as he slid out the padlock and eased the collar open. The skin underneath looked chafed and sore. He tossed the collar onto the floor. “I’ve got some soothing salve. Once you’ve had your bath I’ll put some on you. It’ll be good for your back too.”

“Thank you Sir.” 

The bath was full of water now so James turned off the taps before turning back to Q.

“Come on then, get your pants off and hop in.” 

Q didn’t move. 

“Q?”

With his head bowed, Q started to cry as he cupped his hands over the front of his underpants. He dropped his chin to his chest and shook his head.

“Hey… it’s alright.” James soothed, “You’re safe. I won’t take advantage of you I promise. Your last owner. Did he…?”

Q shook his head again, crying harder. With shaking hands he tucked his thumbs into his waistband and pulled down his underwear and...

“Is that a fucking chastity device?” James felt his fury rise as he took in the black plastic that sheathed Q’s cock. “Were you kept with females?” He’d heard of such a thing. Owners who couldn’t be bothered to care for their slaves properly would sometimes lock up the male’s genitalia rather than take steps to house them separately. He’d heard terrible stories of some poor otherkinds who’d died as a result of infections from being permanently kept in devices like the one Q wore. He watched as Q shook his head.

“No Sir.” His breath hitched as he tried to speak. “He… my master… he said sex was dull… so dull… and boys shouldn’t touch… and…”

James was mortified. Q trembled as James slowly closed the distance between them and pulled him into a hug. For a second Q stiffened and then he slumped as he was held. James had spent enough time with felins to know that touch was a powerful form of communication between them so he nuzzled the trembling creature, cradling the back of his head as he pushed their cheeks together. After a moment he felt Q’s hands tentatively slip around his waist until they were locked in an embrace. 

“God, you poor thing,” James murmured, brushing his lips over the side of his face. “You poor, poor thing. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry someone did this to you. Please. Let me help you. Let me take it off you.”

James released him and then grabbed a small pair of snips from the toolbox. Sitting on the closed toilet lid, he beckoned Q to him. Still crying, he stumbled forward and James steadied his hips. He examined the device. It was designed to be held shut with a small padlock but it instead had been closed with a twist of thick wire. It looked like whoever did it intended it to stay on permanently but as the device was made of plastic it could be easily cut. Q swayed as James tried to find the best way to remove it.

“Put your hands on my shoulders. Stand as still as you can.”

Q did as he was told and when he’d stopped moving James carefully separated the ring that circled his balls from the thick fur that surrounded his genitals. Unlike humans’ wiry pubic hair, felin’s hair was soft and straight. Q’s was the same black as his ears and tail, running in a thickening line down from his navel. James managed to get his finger in behind the ring and snipped it. Then, rather than manipulate the device too much, he repeated the process on the other side so he could remove the ring before sliding the sheath off and throwing it into the bin under the sink. Knowing that the whole thing was probably embarrassing the hell out of Q, he quickly examined him. Although not clean by a long shot, there didn’t seem to be any obvious sign of infection although it did look sore. He stood up and guided the felin over to the bath. Q sank down into the warm water with a wince. James picked up some of the items that had come from Tanner and knelt down next to him. 

“Here we are then. There’s a bottle of shampoo, body wash and some tail shampoo.” He read the label. “Says here it’s good for fleas…” He picked up a flannel and handed it to Q. “Would you like some help?” Q dunked the cloth and started to scrub his chest.

“Would you wash my back for me please Sir?” 

James grabbed the body wash and popped the top, pouring a small amount onto his fingertip. He held it out to Q.

“Smell it. Any good?”

Q looked confused.

“What do you mean Sir?”

“The scent. I know a felin nose is way more sensitive than mine. If you don’t like it I can find you something else.” Q sniffed at it cautiously and then wrinkled his nose. “No good?”

“Smells like toilet cleaner.”

James barked out a laugh and swished his hand clean in the warm water. He made a show of tossing the bottle over his shoulder. Q’s smile as he watched him was small. Reaching over to the caddy at the end of the bath James grabbed a bottle of his own shower gel. He opened it and passed it to Q.

“What about this one?”

Q nodded.

“I like this one. It smells like you Sir.”

“Is that a good thing?”

Q blushed, making James smile.

“I like it.” He repeated.

James looked over Q’s back and decided against using a flannel. The skin looked so sore in places he was scared that he might be too rough if he couldn’t feel what he was doing. Instead he poured a little gel into the palm of his hand and dipped it into the bathwater before carefully smoothing it over the abused skin. He worked quickly and carefully, washing every inch of his back. He was so intent on watching what he was doing he’d almost finished before he realised Q had stopped washing himself. He was sitting as still as a statue, his head tilted back slightly and a low rattle was coming from the depths of his throat with every breath. James added more gel and then moved his ministrations to the back of Q’s neck. His head fell forward and the rattle grew louder. 

James wasn’t sure that Q was even aware that he was purring. Felins tended to be quite tactile but James couldn't remember ever coming across one behaving quite like this. He felt a flutter of pleasure that this poor abused creature, who had only met him a few hours before, was reacting so positively to his touch. He washed all around his neck, switching hands to wash the front of Q’s throat. Q obligingly tilted his head back and James saw his eyes were closed. He could feel the vibration of Q’s purr more distinctly here and it was wonderful. Wanting to continue the experience he asked quietly;

“Would you like me to wash your hair for you?”

Q’s eyes slid open. His purr quietened as he looked up at James sleepily.

“Yes please Sir.”

James handed him a couple of dry flannels from the stack by the bath and folded them.

“Put these in your ears.”

Q did as he was told, holding them in place as James used the cup from the sink to scoop water over his hair. After the shampoo was approved of, he massaged a dollop of it in. He washed Q’s hair twice and managed to get most of the knots out of it. By the time he was rinsing it out a second time, Q’s purr was rumbling again. He quickly toweled it off before grabbing his comb from beside the sink and carefully getting rid of the rest of the tangles. He looked at Q’s beard. He would have offered to shave him but James used a cutthroat razor and he was wary of getting too close to Q with it before he felt totally at ease with him. The beard would just have to stay until James could buy him some disposable razors. When he was finished he stood up.

“You can finish off now. There’s some new clothes for you here, a new toothbrush and paste is on on the sink. The clothes are just sweatpants and a t-shirt but they’re clean. Take your time. Top the bath up with hot water and have a soak if you like. When you’re ready come back through to the lounge.”

He had a feeling Q might not linger in the bath – everything was so new for him that James guessed he might feel insecure being left to his own devices for too long – so he set about quickly getting everything ready for Q in the lounge. By the time the felin shuffled into the room dressed in his new trousers and carrying his t-shirt, James was sitting on the sofa waiting for him, a pile of bedding on the arm next to him. 

“Come sit with me.” Q came over meekly. “I’ve got that salve for your neck and I made you a cup of tea. Come on, sit down.” He sat and James turned him slightly. Opening the small pot in his hands he dipped in his fingers and started smoothing over the worst of the red marks on his back and neck. “This may sting a little for a few minutes but it’s great stuff. I get it from a guy I know in Beijing. I’m not entirely sure that it’s legal over here... I’m not sure it’s a hundred percent legal over there for that matter. It does the trick though. Did you enjoy your bath?” Q nodded. “You can have one whenever you like.” He finished what he was doing. “Put your shirt on.”

Q hesitated to obey and asked timidly.

“Why are you doing all this Sir?”

James put down the pot of salve and picked up the two mugs. He waited until Q had slipped on his shirt before handing one to him.

“Doing what?”

“Being so nice to me. You told M that you didn’t want me…”

“Oh Q,” He paused, trying to think how to put his reasons for helping him into the simplest words he could. “I told her I didn’t want a slave, that’s true. I abhor slavery in all its forms but when she told me that she’d legally signed you over to me, well… if I had refused to take you they would have taken you straight to a rehoming centre. I couldn’t let them do that.”

“Thank you.”

Q sipped at his tea and then his small smile was back.

“This is funny tea.”

“It’s Earl Grey. Do you like it?”

Q hummed his approval.

“It’s very nice.”

The tea had been made while Q was still in the bath so it was cool enough to drink. Q finished his quickly and handed the mug back to James who put it on the coffee table in front of them.

“Thank you Sir.”

James stood up and got a pillow from the pile next to him. He’d already placed a blanket over the seat cushions. He handed the pillow to Q. It was barely nine o’clock but the felin looked exhausted.

“Lie down now.”

Q immediately obeyed, wincing as he tucked the pillow under his head. James grabbed the duvet from the pile.

“This is the summer weight quilt from my bed. If it’s not warm enough, there’s a blanket on the end of the sofa. Like I said, once we’ve got the spare room sorted out you can sleep in there. There’s a single bed under all the boxes somewhere.” James smiled when he realised Q’s eyes were already sliding shut. “Before you fall asleep I want clarify a couple of things for you. I agreed to take you because I knew what the alternatives were but I’ve never wanted to own a slave. I think M’s probably right though - having someone else to think about might be good for me. I think that you will make me a fine companion but I’d like you to call me James. I won’t feel comfortable with you calling me Sir all the time. I want you to treat this place as your home now. If you want anything you’re free to help yourself; the bathroom, a drink, something to eat… whatever, it’s yours. There is one thing though that you need to be careful of. If you ever need me when I’m sleeping and want to wake me up, please do it by calling my name. Don’t be tempted to touch me before I’ve acknowledged that I know it’s you that’s in my room.” Q opened his eyes and looked up at him quizzically. “I have bad dreams,” James explained gently, “I might lash out at you. I don’t want to hurt you.”

“I have bad dreams.” Q said. “Did somebody hurt you too James?”.

“Something like that. Go to sleep now. I’ll see you in the morning.”

James turned the light off as he left the room and shut the door softly. He went back to the kitchen and started to clear up. Once everything they’d used had been washed and stowed away he moved to the bathroom. He put away his tools before returning to the room. He threw the collar into the bin with the chastity device and then took out the liner, tying it off. He didn’t want Q seeing either of them again. He replaced the liner with a new one and went to wipe down the bath, smiling as he realised that Q had already done it. He picked up the rubbish and the pile of Q’s clothing. 

Taking everything back to the kitchen he put the rubbish in the main bin before examining the clothes. They were quite dirty and worn in places but seemed otherwise sound. He went through them all carefully, before putting them in the washing machine. When he got to the anorak he thought that there was something in the pocket. He unzipped it and then realised his error. Whatever was in the coat wasn’t in the pocket – it seemed to be sewn into the lining. He examined it and spotted a small section that had been neatly re-stitched. There was a first aid box in the cupboard under the sink and he removed a small pair of sharp scissors from it. Carefully unpicking the stitches he realised that the thing he’d felt was a small bundle wrapped in the plastic wrapper from a loaf of bread. He opened it and found it full of scraps of paper and cardboard and the short stub of a pencil. Receipts, food wrappers, even magazine pages, all covered in tiny hand-drawn diagrams and spidery writing. James sat down at the kitchen table and slowly went through the little treasure trove of Q’s ideas. He didn’t understand a lot of it but what he could make out was brilliant. His emotions warred inside him as he read. He was thrilled to realise that Q was so clever but disgusted that he should have gone to such lengths to keep his ideas hidden. He vowed to find out who Q’s former master was and make them pay for treating him so poorly.

He carefully replaced the notes into their makeshift bag and put them on the counter. He would let Q have them back in the morning. He put the coat into the machine along with the other clothes and added some washing powder before turning it on. He went to the pantry and got himself a bottle of whiskey. Grabbing a glass he sat back down at the table. As he sat and drank he pondered his young charge. He wasn’t sure what the future held for them but he was damned determined to do right by him.


	3. i.iii

The next morning, James woke up early. As he got out of the shower he caught sight of himself in the bathroom mirror; he was smiling. He had to admit to himself, he was eager to see how Q had slept, feed him and then take him shopping. He needed clothing, new glasses and a collar - hopefully one a bit softer than the last. He also mentally added notepads and pens to the shopping list for him. If Q liked to write then James would make it easy for him. It was strange that he was already so taken with Q but although the felin had been thrust upon him with no warning he was already mentally planning how to care for the lad in the long term. He would have to make provisions for him for when James was away on mission. Maybe he could leave him a credit card so that he could order his shopping online. He could give him an allowance to save him having to think of everything that Q might need. It would be interesting to see what he might like to spend it on.

He dressed and then wandered through to the kitchen to flick on the kettle before heading for the lounge. He knocked on the door quietly and then opened it.

“Q? Are you awake?”

There was no sign of Q stirring so James walked over to the curtains to open them. Light flooded into the room.

“It’s a beautiful day sleepyhead. Come and have some breakfast with me and then we’ll go and pick you some things up in town.”

As he turned he frowned. Q still hadn’t moved. Concerned, James went over to him and pushed the coffee table aside before kneeling down next to the sofa.

“Hey there…”

He drew back the duvet and saw that Q’s face was flushed. He seemed to be sleeping but whined as James touched his face. He was burning up. James tried shaking his shoulder and he realised that his shirt was soaked with sweat. He called his name again but Q didn’t react.

“Shit.”

He reached into his pocket and took out his mobile phone. He quickly dialled.

_“Medical.”_

“It’s Agent Bond. Get me the lead doctor on shift.”

_“One moment please.”_

There was a pause during which James pulled the duvet back off Q. He was soaked with sweat all over and James could see now that he was shivering.

_“Conroy here.”_

“Susan. It’s James. I’m not sure if you’re aware but M gave me a felin yesterday…”

_“I heard. How’s ownership treating you?”_

“Badly. He’s sick.” He quickly described his symptoms. “I need some advice. What do I do about his raging temperature? I can’t give him paracetamol can I?”

 _“Absolutely not!”_ Conroy exclaimed. _“Paracetamol can be extremely dangerous for felins. They have a very high incidence of allergy to it; it’s simply not worth the risk. Is he conscious?”_

“No.”

He heard the rapid tapping of a keyboard’s keys.

_“Are you at your home address?”_

“Yes.”

_“OK, I’m sending someone over to carry out an assessment. We need to see if he can be moved safely. He should be with you in the next half hour. I want the felin here if possible so we can take care of him.”_

“Thank you.”

He rung off and looked down at Q. He was whimpering now. James went to the bathroom and soaked a flannel through in cold water. Going back to his charge he sat beside him and gently wiped his face. Q shuddered and let out a plaintive ‘mmmrow’. The sound tugged at James’s gut. He began to talk quietly to him.

“Come on Q, you’re going to be alright. I’m taking you to see a lovely lady who’s going to help you to get well again. I’m not a fan of Medical myself but Conroy’s a good sort.” Pulling the duvet further down, he lifted Q’s t-shirt and swiped the cloth over his chest. Initially Q sighed but then he gave out a sharp cry of pain when the cloth reached his abdomen. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” James soothed, setting the cloth to one side. He carefully rolled the waistband of Q’s sweatpants and undid the drawstring before easing them down to his hips. His skinny belly looked slightly bloated and James wondered how Q hadn’t felt anything was wrong the night before. Then another thought occurred to him – maybe Q had felt ill but had just been too scared to say anything. He picked up the cloth again and resumed wiping his chest. If he could just get his temperature to drop a little…

The driver arrived twenty-seven minutes later but it felt like an eternity to James. He recognised the man – it was Monroe, one of the nurses from medical. James stood aside as he examined Q, explaining to him about the pain he was in. Monroe checked Q’s dilatory response and took his temperature before he carefully palpated his belly. James’s hands unconsciously clenched into fists when Q started to keen.

“I don’t think we’ll have too much of a problem if we take him to Medical. I think it would be best if you could sit in the back seat with him though. If we can avoid jostling him too much he should be OK.” Monroe stated, standing up. “Do you think you can carry him?”

James nodded. He quickly grabbed his wallet, phone and keys before placing the blanket that was still at the end of the sofa over Q and carefully scooping him up. He was as light as a feather and James wondered again how anyone could be cruel to such a delicate creature. Q briefly struggled as he was lifted so James pressed his cheek up against one silky-smooth ear, whispering to him and soothing him until he calmed.

“Shhh. Still, little one. I’ve got you. I’ve got you now. You’re going to be alright.”

Monroe briefly made a phone call on his Bluetooth headset as they set off, Q safely ensconced on the back seat, lying with his head in James’s lap. James guessed the call must have gone to someone in the Operations department as they didn’t encounter a single red traffic light on the way to MI6. After a couple of minutes Q began to shift and whine again so James gently stroked his hair. He looked at the felin’s unconscious face. Traffic priorities didn’t get changed for just anyone and Conroy had seemed very eager for Q to have the best possible care when all James had wanted was to get some advice… He smoothed the pad of his thumb over Q’s eyebrow. He got the feeling that this wasn’t just any stray that M had selected for him…

“Who are you Q?” He murmured.

~00Q~

Conroy was waiting for them in a patient room when they arrived. James placed Q on the bed and helped her to get him out of his clothes. He moaned as they gently manhandled him.

“I tried to examine him the other day when he came in,” She said as she took her stethoscope from around her neck, “but he was almost feral, wouldn’t let me anywhere near him.” She carefully listened to his chest. “That sounds nice and clear.” She ran a finger over the chafing on his neck. “Was that from his collar?”

“Yes. I took it off him last night. It was far too tight. Do you know anything about where he came from?”

She shook her head and started to prepare to take a blood sample.

“Only that M had him picked up from somewhere. She asked me to give him the utmost attention if he needed anything. I have a feeling she knew he’d been abused but I’m not sure she expected him to be back in here so quickly. Did he give you any indication that he was feeling unwell last night?”

“No,” James said dubiously, “but the collar wasn’t the only thing. When I got him to take a bath I found he’d been left in a chastity device.” Conroy raised her eyebrows.

“Did he say how long he’d been wearing it?”

“No, but it was permanently secured with a twist of wire rather than a padlock. I think it had been on there for some time.”

She sighed as she carefully parted Q's legs.

“I think you might have solved the mystery of what’s wrong with our patient then Bond. He looks sore and I’ll bet any money you like he’s got a urinary infection. Those devices are cruel. His owner probably left it on him for far too long without letting him clean himself properly. Poor little thing. I suppose it’s a small mercy they didn’t just have him neutered though… I’ll do my tests anyway. I’ll take some blood now and get a urine sample from him when he wakes up. Until the results come back though I’ll put him on a broad-spectrum antibiotic as a precaution. Hopefully he’ll start to feel better very soon.”

James helped her cover Q in a hospital gown and watched as she inserted a cannula. She connected up a drip and then injected a syringe of liquid into it.

“There we are. Give him a few hours and I’m sure he’ll perk up.”

“Do you need me to stay?”

“If you wouldn’t mind. I don’t want him waking up alone in a strange place and attacking my staff.” She took the bedding that had been neatly folded over the end of the bed and drew it up over Q, tucking him in.

“He was fine with me last night…” James said dubiously. He couldn’t imagine Q being dangerous. He’d seemed so docile. Then he remembered how he’d been when M tried to leash him.

“Then he must like you, he was wild with me. Pull up a chair and make yourself comfortable. Fancy a cuppa?”

“Please.”

He sat down by the bed and after a couple of minutes he gave into temptation and held Q’s hand.

~00Q~

A couple of hours later Q began to wake up slowly, whinging and shifting as he regained consciousness. James smoothed his hair back off his face, briefly giving into temptation again to brush his fingers over his large silky ears.

“Q?”

Q’s eyes fluttered and then suddenly flew open. He went to sit up and struggled when James tried to hold him down, his hands pressed onto Q’s shoulders.

“Nononononononoooooo!!!!”

His howl of distress was shockingly loud and James was aware of Q’s claw-like fingernails digging into his wrists. All felin’s nails were retractable and naturally very sharp. They were fully extended now but James ignored them and continued to restrain the panicking felin.

“Q? Q!”

Q howled again wordlessly and started to sob, twisting under James’s hands. He kicked out with his feet and his tail thrashed as he fought to get free. James shifted his grip and placed the palms of his hands on Q’s face. Using his elbows to press his shoulders onto the bed he began to speak quickly and calmly.

“Stop it Q please. Tell me what’s wrong. I’ve got you. I’ve got you. Calm down, you’re going to hurt yourself. Please. Just tell me what’s wrong.” James heard someone come into the room behind him and ignored them, guessing it was probably Conroy. Gradually Q stopped fighting but his face remained a picture of misery. He tried to speak but was sobbing so hard it took him several attempts with broken words for James to understand him. Once he realised what he was trying to say he gently scooped him up into his arms. “You thought I’d brought you back here to leave you? You think I want to give you back?” Q buried his face into James’s neck and nodded, still crying. James could feel his tears dampen his t-shirt and he cradled the back of his head. He rocked him slowly, as one might sooth a child, and stroked his back. James felt terrible. Q’s sense of smell must have told him he was back at MI6 before his conscious brain had a chance to catch up. No wonder he was terrified. “Shit. I’m sorry Q. No. I’m not getting rid of you.” He pulled back and looked into Q’s eyes. He stroked his hair back off his face again – his forehead was still burning hot. “You’re sick. I brought you here so that you could get better. Do you remember Doctor Conroy?” Q squinted over at her. Remembering his eyesight was terrible, James beckoned the doctor over. “He can’t see you if you stand over there Susan…”

Conroy came over and sat down on the other side of the bed. Q flinched when she reached out to touch his hand.

“Hello again Q. Remember me? Can you see me now? Do you have problems seeing? Are you short-sighted?” Q nodded and allowed her to examine the cannula in the back of his hand. Blood was seeping out from under the tape that held it in place “We have an optician who has clearance to work in here. I can call him and we’ll get you some new glasses if you like.” Q glanced up at James who smiled at him. Looking back at the doctor, he nodded.

“Yes please.” He whispered. She stroked the fingers of his injured hand.

“I think you must have caught this when you struggled. Shall I sort it out for you?” Q looked up at James again before nodding at her and whispering;

“Yes please.”

Q seemed desperate to stay close to James so he didn’t let go of him as the doctor started preparing the replacement cannula which she then inserted into the back of his wrist. There was a nasty-looking tear in the skin of his hand where the first one had been which she placed a dressing on. The felin trembled and James could see that he was extremely uncomfortable being touched by her. He slowly raised his hand and began to stroke Q’s hair.

“It’s OK Q. She’s not going to hurt you. Nobody here wants to hurt you.”

“That man did.” Came the whispered reply.

James continued petting Q’s hair.

“What man, kitten?”

“The man on guard. When M put me in the cell… He kept saying it was a waste of his time to look after me. He said it would have been easier if they’d just sent me to be put down.”

James felt a wave of anger start to build but he kept his voice calm.

“Did he hurt you?”

“Not much… He punched me a few times when I didn’t move quick enough… spat in my food…”

James scowled. He remembered the guard telling M that he hadn’t been eating. Conroy finished what she was doing and stepped away.

“Well nothing like that will happen while you’re in here, I promise. Do you believe me?”

Q turned his face up to look at James, his gaze searching. For the first time James was struck by how green his eyes were.

“I believe you.” He said quietly.

“Come on then. Let’s lie you down again. You still have some healing to do before Doctor Conroy lets you out of here and that’s best done by sleeping.” Q nodded and allowed James to lie him flat once more and cover him with the bedding he’d kicked off in his panic. James indulged himself by stroking Q’s hair once more. It was so soft he thought he might get addicted to touching it. He took his hand.

“I have to go now. I have a few things I need to do but I’ll be coming back for you, I promise. Before I go though, there’s one thing I’d like to ask you.” Q blinked up at him questioningly. “Last night, when I took you home, were you in pain? I won’t be angry if you were, I just need to know.” Looking chagrined, Q nodded. “Why didn’t you tell me? Did you worry I might send you back if you were sick?” Q nodded again and James sighed. He lifted the hand he was holding and kissed the back of it. “I promise I won’t desert you. You’re mine now and I’ll do my very best to make sure you’re cared for.”

“I still don’t really understand why you would do that.”

“Go to sleep. When you’re feeling a bit better I’ll tell you why.”

Q seemed mollified by James’s answer and his eyes closed. James went over to the door and saw Conroy waiting for him and gestured outside. Stepping out into the corridor she turned to him.

“What the hell happened to him? I’ve never seen a felin so wretched.”

James sighed.

“I don’t know but I’m about to go and see M. Hopefully she’s going to have some answers for me.” He smiled sadly. “Look after him for me would you Susan?”

She smiled back.

“Of course.”

James got into the lift but instead of going straight to the floor where M’s office was, he entered the code for the detention level.

There were no signs of any detainees that day but the facility was usually manned. James saw with a grim satisfaction that the guard from the day before was there. He was sitting behind the front desk with a Daily Mail in his hand and a forefinger rooting through one of his nostrils. As soon as he saw James though, he discarded the paper and whipped his hand away. Pretending he hadn’t seen anything, James smiled.

“Good morning…um?”

“Sykes, Sir.”

“Sykes… Sykes…” James mused slowly, doing his very best to unnerve the man by staring him in the eye and grinning at him. “I was in here yesterday to collect the felin.”

“I remember Sir. Bit of a handful that one!”

“He certainly is.” James agreed, watching the man like a hawk. “Unfortunately I seem to have misplaced my cufflink. Think it might have fallen off while I was trying to leash him. Any chance we could go over the cell and have a hunt for it?”

“That shouldn’t be a problem.” The man got up and walked down the corridor. As soon as his back was turned James leant over the desk and switched off the security cameras covering the cell that had held Q. With two large strides he had caught up with the guard who was still talking. “So. How’s ownership treating you?” The man asked.

“Bit odd. I’ve never actually wanted to own a felin… M seemed to think I’d like him though.”

“Huh.” The man grunted in response. “Not sure I’d give one house space.”

They entered the cell.

“On the other hand,” James mused, “They do tend to be smaller than us and it is fun to pick on those weaker than one’s self isn’t it?”

“Wha…?”

Sykes turned at James’s words and staggered when the agent punched him square in the jaw. He reeled but James had him by the throat and pinned up against the wall by the time he realised what had happened.

“After all. That is what you like, isn’t it? Picking on someone smaller and weaker than yourself?” James leaned in. He was a good three inches taller than the struggling man. “I’m beginning to see the appeal.” He yanked the man forward and then slammed his head back into the brickwork. “Of course you had to go one better, didn’t you? Bullying and tormenting a felin that had clearly already been brutalised? A youngster who thought he was finding a safe-haven here only to find a sadist like you? Let’s make a deal.” He leaned in until his face was inches from Sykes’s. “My boy – and let’s not beat around the bush here, he really is _my boy_ now – is free to come to this building any time he chooses and if I hear that you were even seen on the same floor as him. I. Will. Destroy. You. Do I make myself clear?” The man nodded. “Good.” He released his grip on him but before Sykes could move James rammed his knee up into the man’s crotch. He gasped in pain and sank to the floor. James straightened the sleeves of his sweatshirt. “I would tell you to get that seen to in Medical but my boy’s in there so it looks like you’re out of luck.”

He walked out, feeling decidedly happier and flicked the camera back on at the front desk as he passed. The monitor showed Sykes still curled up in a foetal position on the cell floor.

M was in a meeting when James got to her office so he sat and waited in the reception area. Tanner wasn’t there but the regular receptionist was. She was a rather pretty young woman so he whiled away the time flirting with her. She was giggling when the door to M’s office opened and the head of finance left.

“Leave her alone Bond for God’s sake.”

He winked theatrically at the receptionist before sauntering into M’s office. She had taken her place back behind her desk.

“So. How’s Q? I hear he’s in medical.”

“Nothing too serious. Conroy thinks it’s an infection that should clear up with antibiotics. Poor bugger’s feeling sore though.”

“He’ll be fine. I think you’ll find he’s made of stern enough stuff.” She commented. “So, to what do I owe the honour of a visit? I am rather pressed for time you know.”

“I want to know who he is. Q, I mean. I found some notes on him last night, diagrams, formulas and the like. I didn’t understand all of it but it’s clear he’s very talented. He isn’t just some random stray you picked up for me is he?”

M paused for a moment as if considering her options and then sighed. She reached over to press the button on her intercom.

“Diana? We’re going to need some coffee bringing in.”


	4. i.iv

 

 

 

 

As James sipped at his coffee, M began to speak.

“You remember Major Boothroyd of course?”

He nodded.  Boothroyd was quartermaster when James was first promoted to the Double-0 programme.

“Geoffrey Boothroyd had already been with MI6 for some time when I joined.” She continued. “He acted as my quartermaster during my years as 005.  I was already married to my first husband and the four of us, Geoffrey, his wife Miriam, my husband Alastair and I got along famously.  We used to regularly attend the same dinner parties.”

“I didn’t realised he’d been married.” Said James.

“No.  His wife passed away relatively young.  She was still in her thirties when she lost control of the car she was driving.  Icy conditions at night.  She died instantly.  Boothroyd was distraught.  It almost destroyed him and yet the day after the funeral he was back at work like nothing had happened.  We could all see it was eating him up from the inside but nothing anyone said or did seemed to help.  That was until the day I introduced him to my canin, Tanner.”

“You _owned_ Tanner?”

“Yes.  For several years.  He belonged to a dear old aunt of mine and when she passed away I inherited him.  He came to me when he was fifteen years old.  My aunt was something of an eccentric.  She never married or had a family.  When she was in her sixties she bought Tanner while he was still in nappies.  She then proceeded to raise him as her son, insisting that he be allowed to attend school.  She paid for it of course.  There’s no such thing as a free state education for otherkind.  Tanner was wary of me when we first met but I sat him down and asked him what he wanted out of life.  He said to continue his education and eventually be freed.  His grades were good so I agreed to both of those things.  I’d owned him for about a year when Miriam died.  On a hunch I invited Boothroyd over to our house for dinner one evening and introduced him to Tanner.  He was a charming young pup and by the end of the night I’d convinced Boothroyd that he might like an otherkind of his own to keep as a companion.  It was really just to give him something to care for.  He seemed warm to the idea and the following week he told me he’d bought one from a local shelter.”

“Q?”

“After a fashion.” 

James frowned, not understanding.

“Q’s  _ mother _ .  Boothroyd had gone to the shelter looking for a male canin but he’d caught sight of the young felin.  She was almost eight months pregnant and very sickly.  She’d been owned by a well-to-do family who’d bought her to be their daughter’s constant companion when she was very young.  Sadly, when another felin belonging to the household raped her and made her pregnant her owners dumped her in the shelter. She was eighteen. She’d been there some time when Boothroyd found her.  He was determined to help her though and did everything he could but I think the stress of everything that had happened to her must have been too much.  She died giving birth to her litter along with two of her kittens.   Boothroyd named the one that survived Fortescue.”

“Q.” James said softly.

“Boothroyd finally started taking time off work so he could hand-rear the little mite.  I first saw him when he was just a few weeks old.  He was so small.  So cute.  That little black tail…”

James smiled as he watched M remember.  He couldn’t imagine Q as a tiny kitten.  M paused for a moment and then shook herself as if casting off the memories.

“Anyway!  Boothroyd eventually employed a nanny for the kitten and he returned to work, happier and much healthier.  He would give me regular updates on Q’s progress as he home-tutored him and by the time the lad was a teenager it was clear he was exceedingly bright.  He was every bit as clever as Boothroyd at engineering and inventing things and far, far better at computers than him despite the fact he was largely self-taught.”  She paused and sipped at her coffee, collecting her thoughts.  

“Shortly before Q’s eighteenth birthday, Boothroyd came to me and asked me a favour.  He intended to give Q his emancipation papers for his birthday as that meant that when his twenty-first birthday came around he would be legally free.” James knew the law well.  Anyone freeing their slaves had to wait three years from the date of the initial application.  It was a rather antiquated law designed to prevent the unlikely scenario of a slave killing their owner and then forging the papers.  “He asked if I would consider employing Q once he was free and I agreed to.  I had already freed and employed Tanner by then so he knew I had no qualms about having otherkind on my staff.  To be honest, Q seemed like the kind of person who would have been a huge asset to us.  Any protégé of Boothroyd would have been an asset.”

“What happened?”

“Three weeks before Q’s twenty-first birthday, Boothroyd arranged to take a couple of days off work.  That wasn’t unusual, he used to go on walking holidays with his sister.  She contacted us the day he was due to return to work to say that he’d died of a suspected heart attack in his sleep.  Q was nowhere to be found.”

“He didn’t go to a shelter?”

“He did.  Apparently there was a mix-up.  Instead of going into the holding area he went straight to the sale section.  By the time the police had contacted Boothroyd’s sister and she’d gone to collect him, he’d been sold on.”

“Do we know who to?”

“The paperwork said it was to a 'Raoul Silva' but we checked.  The documents he provided as identification were false.”

“That can’t have been a coincidence.”

“We didn’t think so either, so we had our pathology department carry out an autopsy.  They found minute traces of an extremely potent toxin.  A regular pathologist couldn’t have found it.”

“Does Q know Boothroyd was murdered?”

“I don’t know.  The man who took him might have told him.”

“How did he find his way back here?”

“We searched for him initially but we found no trace.  I’d all but given up hope of ever finding him until last week.  I logged onto my email account and there it was; a draft email that I hadn’t written.  He’d managed to hack into my account.  He explained that if he’d tried to send a message it would have been detected at his end but…”

“But if he simply writes something into a hacked document…”

“Exactly.  I asked him to meet us in Hyde Park and he agreed and three days later Tanner met with him and brought him here.  In retrospect, I probably should have asked him where he was first though.”

“Oh?”

“He walked here from Solihull.”

“Fuck.”  Solihull was on the outskirts of Birmingham… and over a hundred miles from the rendezvous.  “So what now?” Bond asked.

“Your suspension from active service stands but while you’re off official missions I’d like you to keep Q close to you.  I’m trusting you to keep him safe.  I wanted to give him the protection of a Double-0 agent and I did consider giving him to 006 but he doesn’t have your history.  I’ve read your file.  I know how you were raised.”  James nodded.

“You knew I couldn’t refuse Q.

“Indeed.  Do something for me though Bond.  Find out who this bastard calling himself Silva really is.  We’ve already searched the address in Solihull that Q gave us but but it was abandoned by the time we got there and whoever held him there left no clues.”

James drained his coffee cup and placed it neatly back onto its saucer.

“Yes Ma’am.”

 

~00Q~

 

He called back into Medical to see Q and wasn’t surprised to see that he was fast asleep.  He lingered for a moment by his bedside.  He looked so small and vulnerable, curled up under the pile of bedding.  As James watched he whined and shifted in his sleep.  The agent immediately reached out and stroked his hair, running the palm of his hand over Q’s ear.  The black fur was as fine as silk and felt warm to James’s touch.

“Easy kitten.  Settle down.”

Q grumbled a little and then relaxed.  James found himself wanting to sit and watch over him again but he resisted temptation.  He had too much to do.  Instead he left the room and went looking for Conroy.  He found her in the small kitchen at the back of the department making herself a cup of tea.

“Another tea-break?” James grinned.

She smirked and stuffed the rest of the Jammie Dodger she’d been eating into her mouth.  She chewed twice and then held her hand over her mouth, trying not to spray crumbs as she spoke;

“Piss off Bond.”

He waited patiently as she swallowed her biscuit and watched as she mashed the teabag in her cup with a spoon.  Once she was able to, she asked;

“Did you look in on him?”

“Yes.  He was out like a light.”

Conroy flicked her teabag into the recycling caddy that sat next to the kettle.

“I should think so.  I gave him a sedative after you’d gone.  Nothing too heavy, just enough to make sure he sleeps.”

“Thank you.”

“No problem.  You’ll be pleased to hear that he might well have our full attention for the next twenty four hours, if we don’t have any other emergencies come in.  He’s our only patient at the moment.  Trevelyan is due in here when he gets back from his mission tomorrow though.  Apparently he’s injured one of his hands rather badly and it’s going to require surgery.”

“Sounds nasty.”

“Knowing you Double 0s and your propensity for downplaying the seriousness of your injuries, I wouldn’t be surprised if he's missing a hand altogether when he gets here.”  James smirked as he followed her out of the small room.  “In any case, I’m going to nominate a small number of staff from every shift to care for Q and restrict access to his room for anyone else.  There’s no sense in panicking him by surrounding him with strangers.”

“Thank you.  Do you have any clue how long he might need to stay?”

“If his blood and urine samples don’t show anything I’m not expecting, it will be about three days.”

“That long?”

Conroy shrugged.

“I could send him home tonight with a ten-day course of antibiotics and painkillers if you like but they’d most likely upset his stomach.  Then you can deal with trying to keep him fed, hydrated and clean twenty four hours a day for the next week and a half.  Alternatively you can let us take care of him, he’ll get all the antibiotics he needs and we can manage his pain medication for him and…”

“Fine!” James said, laughing and putting his hands up in surrender.  “I’ll let you take care of him.”  Conroy looked smug.  “That might help me actually.  I had no warning that he was going to be given to me and I’m rather under-prepared.  Shall I come back and see him again later though?”  She nodded.

“Swing by about six.  We’ll be rousing him around then to see if we can get him to eat.  It might help if you’re here.”

“Will do.”

 

~00Q~

 

Bond went back home and had a rather productive afternoon.  By the time he left to go back to MI6 he’d managed to sort through a third of the boxes in his spare room.  He called into a small shopping centre and picked up a few things for Q on his way to the Tube.  As he sat on the train he reflected on the past twenty-four hours.  He was used to adapting to anything that the universe threw at him while he was out on mission but this was different.  This was personal.  Intimate.  Apart from M wanting him to find out about Q’s last master, this was nothing like a mission.  This was a fundamental change to the way that James would be living his life and he felt surprisingly OK with it.  He thought wistfully back to the days when he still lived with the Kincades… 

His train arrived at Vauxhall, breaking off his chain of thought, and it was a short walk from there back to MI6.  The evenings were dark now and the air was bitingly cold as he neared the river.  He picked up his pace and shrugged his shoulders up against the cold, eager to get back to see Q.   When he finally arrived at Medical he found Q sitting up in bed, slowly chewing on a sandwich.  His face broke out into a sunny smile when he saw James.

“There you are!” He exclaimed and James saw with some amusement that he was extremely woozy.  Q turned to Conroy who was sitting in the chair next to him with a book on her lap.  “He came back!  You said he would come back, didn’t you?”  James shrugged off his coat and put it and the bag of shopping on the foot of the bed.  He sat on the side of it and gently righted the plate that was threatening to slide off Q’s lap.

“How are you feeling?”

Q held up the sandwich in his hand.

“Susan made me a sandwich.  It has  _ chicken _ in it.” He added, like that was the most marvellous thing in the world. He took another bite and chewed on it.  Conroy laughed.

“I think maybe I could have left him to sleep a while longer.  The sedatives have made him a bit loopy.”

James grinned at her and then asked Q;

“You like chicken, do you?”

Q nodded. 

“My father...  he used to get me Kentucky Fried Chicken if I was good.  That’s the best chicken.  I like that a lot.”

James smiled.

“Your father?  Do you mean Major Boothroyd?”

He immediately regretted his words as he watched Q hesitate, a shadow passing over his face.  He put down the sandwich and frowned.

“My father.  Did you know him?”

James nodded.

“He was quartermaster for a little while after I joined MI6.”

“He died.”  Q said sadly.  “Tiago had him killed.”

“Who’s Tiago?”  James asked gently.

To his horror, Q started to cry.

“He’s such a bad man.  He killed my father and stole me away to an island and made me do terrible things for him.”

“What things?”

“He made me build a computer for him that would allow him to hack into any server he wanted... and sometimes he made me get into defence systems and steal secrets and missile launch codes and he used me to extort people and destroy governments and I didn’t want to but he would hurt me and do awful things to me if I didn’t and…”

James shifted forward to hold Q’s hands as Conroy stood and took the plate away.  Q’s voice got louder as he became more stressed. 

“… sometimes when I was really bad he would beat me or strip me naked and give me to his men or hold me down and put a cloth over my face and pour water over my head until I couldn’t breath and my ears would fill with water until I was deafened and I’d try to scream but I couldn’t.  One time he stood me up in front of everyone and held a sharp knife to the root of my tail and threatened to slice it off if I didn’t launch a missile strike on a country that someone wanted to steal oil from and he cut into me and I thought he was really going to do it and… and…”

“Shhhh…Q...” 

James squeezed Q’s hands comfortingly.  Christ.  He’d actually laughed the night before when Q had said he didn’t like getting his ears wet.  James had been waterboarded a few times in the past.  Even when it was done to him as part of a training program it had been intolerable.  He couldn’t imagine how horrific it would be for a felin with their highly sensitive ears.  Yet worse than that, threatening to cut off a felin’s tail was just about the most barbaric thing you could do to them.  Even ignoring the potential paralysis and possible death that could come of the trauma; the shame and stigma a felin felt at losing their tail could be immense.

“I didn’t want to do it.  I didn’t want to do any of it!” Q shouted.

“I know.  I know kitten.  It’s OK.  I understand.”

Q suddenly  wrenched a hand away from James’s grasp and thumped himself on the head.

“I hate this!” He hissed, hitting himself again.  “I’m not like this!  I’m not like this!  He made me like this!  Wretched and scared of my own fucking shadow!”

James gently recaptured his wrist and pulled both of Q’s hands into his chest.

“A few years ago I fell in love.” He spoke quietly and Q stopped struggling, momentarily confused by what James had said.  “I was on a mission and I fell in love with a beautiful woman.  The man I was sent to bring in captured her and when I tried to save her I was tortured.  I was beaten so badly that I can’t father children anymore.”  Q stared at him, anguished.

“Oh James…”

“All through my recovery she was there by my side caring for me and when the clinic I was in discharged me I sent MI6 my resignation and set off to sail around the world with her.”

“What happened?”

“I discovered that she’d betrayed me, stolen a huge amount of money from the government and that she was partially responsible for the beating that almost killed me.  Less than an hour after I found all that out, she died in front of me.  She drowned as I desperately tried to save her.  Despite everything she’d done I still loved her, you see.”

James released Q’s hands but as he tried pull his away Q captured them.  When James spoke again, it was with his head bowed and his voice low.

“I came back here and everyone expected me to be the same old Bond.  The same old agent, ready to take on the world for Queen and country but I wasn’t the same.  I wasn’t the same for the longest time.”  He looked up into Q’s eyes.  “Don’t be too hard on yourself Q.  It was only a few days ago that you were still with that terrible man.  It will take a while for you to settle and for you to truly accept on a subconscious level that you’re safe now.  I understand that.”

“How did you get over it?” Q asked quietly.

“I’m not sure you ever get over something like that but you can learn to live with the memories.  Stop them from consuming you.  And it helped in my case that I was able to track down the man who was ultimately responsible.”

“I’m not sure I’d ever like to track down Tiago.”

“Maybe you won’t have to.  If you can give them some information, when you feel ready, MI6 might be able to do it for you.”  Q trembled and James pulled him in for a hug.  “Don’t think about that now.”  He kissed the side of Q’s neck.  “Lie down and I’ll tell you why I think M chose to give you to me.”

 

 

 


	5. i.v

Q lay back down and James pulled over the chair to the side of the bed.  Tucking in close he leant his elbow on the mattress and began to speak.

“I am an exceedingly wealthy man and I owe that fact to the sizeable inheritance that I received when I turned twenty-five.  My grandfather and many generations of Bonds before him made their fortunes in slavery.  They didn’t care who they pedalled – all types of otherkind, humans when it was still legal - they didn’t care as long as it turned them a profit.  They even introduced breeding programs to ensure the health and stamina of their slaves.  Forcing males and females together…  It was terrible.  

“My grandfather had two children; my father, whose name was Andrew and his sister Charmian.  As the only son it was expected that my father would inherit the family business and I think he was OK with that.  For a while anyway.  When father graduated from university my grandfather encouraged him to go travelling for a year before settling down to work.  Father was twenty-one and he leapt at the chance, intending to visit every country in Europe.  As it turned out though, he didn’t get any further than France.”

“He didn’t?” Q asked.

“He’d been in Paris for less than a week when he saw the most gorgeous woman in a café by the Eiffel Tower.  Her name was Monique Delacroix and she was a Swiss national visiting for the summer.  My father fell hopelessly in love with her but she instantly took a dislike to him.  She was vehemently against slavery and didn’t want anything to do with someone from a family like the Bonds.  Over the course of the next few months my father persevered.  They spent long days talking and eventually two things happened; she fell in love with him and she brought him around to her way of thinking.  By the time he returned to England the following spring, she accompanied him as his fiancé and he was determined not to go into the family business after all.”

“Your grandfather must have been furious.”

James shrugged.

“Not so much as you might think.  My grandfather was a strange old stick.  He had no concern whatsoever for the slaves around him but he believed absolutely in every man’s right to follow his own path in life.  He gave my father his blessing but insisted on one thing; that for a wedding present they take a pair of otherkind to have as their slaves.  I’m not sure grandfather cared what they did with them but he just wanted my father to know what it was like to own them.  My father immediately picked a felin called Kincade.  Kincade was a couple of years younger than him and they’d known each other for most of their lives.  Kincade was a strapping chap.  He had a great big bushy ginger tail and was muscular from all the physical labour he did around my grandfather’s estate.  He was magnificent back then.  I think my grandfather had hoped that father would select a suitably fertile mate for Kincade but instead he chose a pretty little Blacktail called Marnie who couldn’t have kittens.  Marnie had been through three forced bondings but had failed to fall pregnant.”

“Why did your father chose her then?  Didn’t he want Kincade to have any kittens?” Asked Q.  He was beginning to look sleepy.

“Can’t you guess?  He chose her because he knew that she and Kincade loved each other.  By owning them both my father could ensure that they got to stay with each other.”

Q smiled.

“After my father had owned them for two years, the minimum time required by law, he gave them both their emancipation papers and three years after that they were freed.”

“What happened to them?”

“The day they became free my father sat them both down and offered them their jobs back.  He offered them both good wages and a house in the grounds of the estate where we were living at the time.  I’d been born the year before and we all lived together at our family’s house, Skyfall in Scotland.”

“Why did your father free them if he still wanted them to work for him?” Q looked puzzled, “I mean, he could have kept them and not had to pay them at all.”

“The point was, he no longer agreed with slavery.  If he’d kept them enslaved he wouldn’t have been able to live with his conscience.  Or my mother for that matter!”

“What did your grandfather say about your father freeing them?”

“I don’t suppose he’d have been too happy but he passed away a few weeks before I was born so we never got to find out.”

Q blinked slowly and James knew he was fighting to stay awake so he quickly told the rest of his story.

“I grew up at Skyfall but when I was old enough I was sent away to boarding school.  Every holiday that I went home I spent as much time with Marnie and Kincade as I did with my own parents.  My father worked away a lot – he was a representative for an armaments company – and he quite often took my mother with him on his travels.  I didn’t mind in a way.  I loved spending time with Marnie and Kincade and I think they liked having me around.  My parents would even let me visit them in the evenings when they were home and there was many a time that father would come to collect me at the end of the night, only to find me cuddled up with them both on the settee, listening to the radio.  My father was a little reserved so I loved the way those two felins would hug me. I’ve never met an otherkind so eager to make physical contact.  I think for their part, being close with me might have made up for the lack of kittens in their lives.”

James paused and indulged in the memories.  The wonderfully creamy rice pudding Marnie would make.  The time Kincade consoled him when he broke his arm falling out of a tree, holding him close to his chest so he could feel the soothing rumble of his purr as they waited for the doctor.  The evening snuggles spent listening to some Radio 4 play or other.  He was shaken out of his reverie when Q slipped his hand into his.  He smiled at him, suddenly feeling rather sad at having to tell the next part of his story.

“When I was eleven years old my parents died together in a climbing accident in the Aiguilles Rouges near Chamonix.  I was distraught.  There was a priest hole that led to a tunnel under Skyfall and I hid there for days.  When I finally emerged I could barely stand to look at Marnie and Kincade.  I knew that I would be taken away from them you see.  It felt like I was being forced to lose two sets of parents at once.  My aunt – my father’s older sister Charmian – came up from near Canterbury where she lived for the reading of my father’s will and to everyone’s amazement we discovered that it was not my father’s wishes that I go to stay with her.  Instead he stipulated that I be put under the guardianship of Kincade and Marnie."

“Really?” Q’s eyes which he’d been struggling to keep open for five minutes or more suddenly opened wide.  “Do you mean to say you were _ raised _ by felins?”

James chuckled.

“From the age of eleven, yes.  My father made provision for them so that the estate would pay their wages until I turned twenty-five, the age at which I inherited everything.  It was quite the scandal.  Aunt Charmian made a huge fuss about it all but my father’s instructions were quite explicit and he’d taken the precaution of telling quite a few of his closest, most influential friends his plans so that there was absolutely no question that it was definitely what he wanted.”

“So when you said you didn’t want a slave…”

“It was the truth.  All my adult life it’s felt wrong to even think about owning another being like that but when we met and M told me you were already mine… Oh kitten, I can’t tell you how happy it makes me to think about living with a felin again.”

“You must miss them very much.”

James frowned.

“My parents?”  He asked.

“Marnie and Kincade.  They… that was all a long time ago.” Q looked confused.  “Didn’t they pass away?”

“Well I hope not,” James smiled, “Or there’d be no-one looking after Skyfall for me.”

Q suddenly laughed and it was one of the loveliest things James had seen in a good long while.

“They still work for you?”

“They do.  Marnie keeps an eye on the house and Kincade is the estate manager.  They’re getting on a bit now but they’re still healthy and happy.  I try to phone them at least once a week.  I’ll have to take you up there sometime.  Introduce you.”

Conroy slipped back into the room and went to the other side of the bed.  James realised he’d been so intent on talking to Q that he hadn’t even seen her leave.

“I think it’s time this lad got some more sleep.”  She said gently.  “Do you need the bathroom first Q?”

He nodded and James helped him out of bed as Conroy moved the drip on its stand for him.  The three of them made their way slowly to the small bathroom that adjoined the main room.  Conroy left them to it as Q stood shakily and peed.  James hovered behind him, ready to catch him if he stumbled.  He managed though and then tottered over to wash his hands.  Once clean he turned to James and, instead of going to leave the room he took two shaky steps forward and hugged him.  James instantly wrapped his arms around him.  

“Thank you.”

“What for?”

“For caring so much.  I’m starting to think I might be OK now.”

James smiled and kissed his forehead.

“I promise that you will be.”

They stood there without speaking for almost a minute until Q’s legs started to tremble with the effort of being upright.  James guided him towards the door and opened it.  Conroy was waiting to take the drip again.  They got him back into bed and tucked him in.  Conroy did one more check of Q’s vitals and then depressed another syringe into his drip line.  Within a couple of minutes he was sleeping and James moved the bag of shopping off the foot of his bed and onto the chair he’d been sitting in.  He was putting on his coat when he noticed Conroy was taking another blood sample from Q.

“Why are you doing that?” He asked quietly..

“You heard what he said earlier.” She replied through gritted teeth.  “Stripped naked and thrown to a group of men as punishment!  What do you think they did to him when they had him Bond?  I’m going to run another series of tests.  Make sure those filthy bastards haven’t infected him with anything.”  Her movements were jerky and James could see that she was furious.  “I took the Hippocratic oath when I qualified as a doctor.  I swore to heal and help.”  She looked up at James, her expression was hard.  “But I know what you do for a living and I want you to swear to me that if you ever find the bastard that owned Q, if you ever find  _ any _ of those men, you promise me you’re going to make those fuckers suffer.”

James was shocked to hear such foul language coming from Conroy, she was usually one of the sweetest people he knew. 

“It would be my pleasure.  They’ll wish they’d never laid eyes on him.  I swear it.”

James checked his phone as he left and saw that it was only just past eight o’clock.  On the off-chance that M hadn’t gone home yet he went up to her office.  She wasn’t there but the lights were still on so he went down to Operations.  He found her chatting to Tanner but the canin made his excuses and left them alone when he saw James approaching.

“Bond.  Just the man.  Apparently someone roughed up one of our security guards earlier today.  You wouldn’t happen to know anything about that would you?”

“A security guard?  He wouldn’t be the one that thought it was acceptable to bully terrified felins would he?  No Ma’am, not a thing.”

M's lips twitched for a second before she managed to marshal her expression. 

“Fair enough.  Did you need me for something?”

“Does the name Tiago mean anything to you?”

“Tiago?”

“I’ve been speaking to Q.  He was upset and didn’t want to talk about the man who took him but he let a few details slip.  He definitely ordered Boothroyd killed so he could take Q, he told Q as much.  He threatened Q into building what sounds like a supercomputer and then used it to hack his way into all kinds of sensitive information.”

“And he referred to this man as Tiago?  The man who masqueraded as Raoul Silva?”

“So it would seem.”

“Interesting.” She pondered.

“How so?”

“That name is ringing a bell.  That, and the computers...the hacking… I need to do some digging.  If I come up with anything I’ll let you know.” 

“Very good Ma’am.”

 

~00Q~

 

James changed into sweatpants when he got home and grabbed the whiskey bottle and a glass before continuing the task of clearing out the spare room.  By two in the morning he’d gone through everything.  He’d paused several times, perched on the side of the little bed to stop and look at things.  He found a collection of photographs that he’d thought he’d lost years before.  One of them showed James with Marnie and Kincade.  He smiled at the Royal Navy uniform he was wearing.  The photograph was taken when he was eighteen, the day before he left Skyfall to join his first ship.  They were all laughing but James remembered Marnie’s tears at him leaving.  The photograph was in a pretty silver frame that Kincade and Marnie had sent to him one Christmas.  He leaned over and put it on the bedside table thinking Q might like it.  

He put the paperwork he found in the small filing cabinet he kept in the lounge by his desk.  There was a selection of old clothes that were too small for him that he hadn’t got around to throwing out.  He tucked them into the wardrobe thinking they might do for Q.  Everything else, books, old magazines and various knickknacks that he’d picked up on his travels, he put on the shelves in the lounge.  Shelves which had been mostly empty since he moved in.  When he was finished he took his glass and bottle and sat on the sofa.  He looked at the shelves.  It made the whole room look lived-in.

He wasn’t sure how that made him feel.

He awoke late the next day for the first time in a long time.  It usually took him a couple of weeks to wind down from mission mode but he’d lain down on the sofa the night before thinking about Q and the next thing he knew he was waking up in daylight.  He stretched contentedly and was surprised to see it was gone ten o’clock.  He wandered over to the window and saw that it was belting down with rain which was fairly typical for the start of December.  He smiled, wondering how Q was.  Despite the traumatic parts of the previous evening James was happy that he had finally got to share his story with the young felin.  He hoped that it would help Q to learn to trust him. 

As he set up the coffee machine he went back to the thoughts he’d had as he drifted off to sleep.  If he’d been asked a week before if he would have been prepared to share his life with a felin again he’d have immediately said no.  He’d never had any interest in being a slave owner.  His experiences of growing up with Kincaid and Marnie had shaped him into a better man than that.  He found that he was really looking forward to bringing Q home with him though.  He hated to admit to himself but as he got older he found that he was feeling more and more lonely and isolated, especially when he was off-mission.  He wondered if that was why he’d fallen so hard for Vesper.  A simple need for human contact.  Maybe having Q around would be better.  Having someone who would be quick to seek physical comfort.  Someone to hold when things were rough.  Someone to share meals and quiet times with… 

 

~00Q~

 

Q looked much better when James called in to see him that evening.  The felin was reading a newspaper, holding it close to his face, when Bond went into his room.  He smiled when he looked up and laughed when he sniffed the air and realised what James had tucked in the crook of his arm.

“Is… is that for me?”

James chuckled and put the cardboard bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken on the wheeled table that sat over Q’s legs.  He pushed it towards him.

“I got it on the way here.  You said you liked it.”

Q’s face glowed with happiness as he reached into the bucket and pulled out a piece of the chicken.  He bit into it with a groan.

“Oh my God.  Oh my God!  I haven’t had this for so long!”  He pushed the bucket towards James.  “Have some please.  It’s no fun to eat on your own.”

By the look of rapture on Q's face James seriously doubted that but he took a small piece.  Of all the fast food chains, KFC was the least obnoxious as far as James was concerned.  He watched as Q savoured his meal, getting thoroughly smeared in grease in the process.  He only ate a few of the chips but he managed four pieces of chicken before admitting defeat.  He sat back and scrubbed at his fingers with a paper napkin before unexpectedly belching loudly.  It seemed to have taken him by surprise and he covered his mouth and blushed. 

“I’m sorry.  That was so rude.”

James threw his head back and laughed until his sides hurt.  Every time he tried to stop he caught sight of the shocked expression on Q’s face which set him off again.

“Fucking hell!” He finally choked out. “Your face!”

Q grinned back at him.

“Well I’m glad my bodily functions entertain you.”

James tidied away the rubbish still laughing, and took the rest of the food out to the staff on the front desk who gathered around it, not unlike a swarm of very polite locusts.  When he went back to Q’s room he found the bag he’d left the night before.

“I forgot to say, I brought you some things yesterday.”  He drew out a pair of Levis, a t-shirt, a packet of underpants, socks  and a jumper.  “I got these for you.  I think they’re the right size.  I went by the size of the clothes you were wearing when we first met…  I didn’t know about shoes though so I brought a pair of my trainers.  They might be a bit big but they should be alright if we tie the laces tightly.  I was going to get you a new coat but I thought you may like to choose a one yourself.  I tried to wash the one you arrived in but it pretty much disintegrated…”  James paused when he heard Q gasp.  “It’s OK Q.  I found your notes.  They’re here.”  He walked back over to the bed, reaching into the bag.  He handed the bundle of notes to Q who held them to his chest in relief.  “I got you this to go with them.” He gave Q a large leatherette-bound notebook and a packet of mixed pens and pencils.  “I didn’t know if you would prefer pens or…”

James was interrupted by Q surging up off the bed and flinging his arms around his neck.  He laughed and slipped his hands around his waist.

“Thank you.  Thank you so much James.  Thank you!”  Q peppered the side of James’s face and neck with kisses and James slipped a hand up into the mess of Q’s hair to hold him close.  He smiled when he felt the vibration of Q’s rumbling purr in his chest where they were pressed together.

“You’re welcome.  You are so welcome.”

Q pulled back and sniffed.  He was crying again but James didn’t think he’d ever seen someone look so happy.

“I had to keep my ideas hidden for so long.  I was forbidden from making notes unless I was working on something for Tiago and then he would burn them after the project was complete.”  He grinned at things in his lap and James was thrilled that something that had only cost him a few pounds could give Q so much joy.

“That’s not all.” James said and Q clapped his hands when he saw the final gift.

“A packet of razors!  Does that mean I can finally get rid of this bloody beard?”

James sat on the bed with Q and used a comb and a pair of scissors that he’d brought from home to trim off the worst of the fuzz.  Wary of having Q in the bathroom for too long when he still wasn’t feeling a hundred percent James fetched a bowl of water and a towel and shaved him where he sat.  Once he was clean shaven, he helped him through to the bathroom and into the bath.  As he had the night they first met, James washed his hair and his back for him.  When he was clean, he helped Q to dry off and then carefully dressed him in a pair of James’s pyjamas before waiting for him to clean his teeth.  Conroy was in the room when they came back in.  James had seen her earlier and told her his plans and she’d agreed to change Q’s bedding for him while he bathed.  She stopped what she was doing and put her hand over her mouth when she saw him.

“Look at you.”  She exclaimed softly.  “Oh James, he’s gorgeous!”

James had to admit she had a point.  Q looked ten years younger without his beard and he had a pleasant, open face.  He blushed at her compliment.

“Doctor Conroy, please.” He muttered, looking as pleased as punch despite his embarrassment.  She finished fussing the pillows into position and then beckoned to him.   He got back into bed and sat patiently as she checked him over.

“Everything’s looking good.  Your temperature’s almost back to normal.  How do you feel?”

“Much better.  I’m still a bit sore though.”

“You might well be for a few days.” She glanced up at James.  “I’m going to discharge him in the morning.  I’ll arrange the details with you before you go.”

James nodded and she turned back to Q.

“I almost forgot!  I have something for you.  Why don’t you show James?”  She reached into her pocket and took out a glasses case.  “He had his eyes tested this morning and I asked for his glasses to be made up immediately”.  Q smiled as her took it off her and opened it.  Taking the glasses out, he put them on.  They had thick plastic frames that were dark at the top and clear at the bottom.  They suited him perfectly.  He looked at James and then pouted.

“Oh dear.  You’re not quite as handsome as I’d imagined.”

Conroy snorted with laughter in a very un-lady like manner and James realised Q was joking, getting him back for James’s earlier laughter at his expense.  He attempted to hold back a grin and failed.

“You cheeky little sod...”

 

 

 

 


	6. i.vi

James went to MI6 to take Q home the next morning. Conroy had asked him to come and collect him at ten o’clock to give them time to give Q his breakfast and a final once-over before he left. He walked into the reception area a little before ten to find 006 – Alec Trevelyan – arguing with Conroy at the front desk. His right hand was encased in thick plaster and he was dressed in a hospital robe which had a wide split up the back. He seemed completely unconcerned that his arse was on full display to everyone in the room. As Bond approached them he caught the gist of the disagreement.

“…but you said I could be discharged today!”

“No. What I actually said was that you might well be discharged today, pending an examination by Doctor Kressler. As Doctor Kressler doesn’t start his shift until two o’clock I suggest you go back to your room and wait patiently.”

“How about you discharge me and I’ll just come back at two?”

“How about you go back to your room and I don’t place a recommendation on your file that you be suspended from active duty, pending your completion of a twelve-week course of physiotherapy?”

Alec scowled but Conroy ignored him and smiled at James instead.

“Bond! Here to pick up your boy? He’s with one of the nurses. She’s helping him to get dressed and packed up. He shouldn’t be too long. I’ll go and see how he’s getting on.” She hurried off. James went to sit down in the small waiting area but stopped when he heard Alec speak.

“I hear M gave you a cat.”

James bristled at Alec’s language as he turned to face him. It was about as polite to call a felin a cat as it was to call a man an ape.

“M gave me a felin, yes. She thought I might like a companion.”

“Bloody hell.” Alec replied. “Wish she’d give me one. Have you seen the price of them recently? Extortionate! Have you fucked it yet?”

James frowned at Alec’s sudden shift in questioning.

“It’s not like that. I don’t want him for that. Q’s been abused and…”

Alec snorted derisively. 

“Come on James. You’d fuck anything that moves! Do you mean to tell me you haven’t slipped it to him yet? You should you know. I had a felin the last time I was in Tallinn. She was a wild one. Three words: “raspy tongued blowjobs”. Brilliant! I took her up the arse and yanked her tail just as I started to come and she…”

“For fuck’s sake Alec!” James snapped. “I do not want to shag Q!”

Of course Q chose that exact moment to walk into reception. He was dressed ready to go in the clothes that James had bought for him but he still looked a little peaky. James wondered if he was well enough to be discharged. Alec whistled appreciatively but James ignored him, holding his hand out to Q. Q smiled when he saw James and walked straight over to him and ducked in under his arm to embrace him.

“Hello there. Are you ready to go?” Q nodded.

“Susan’s given me some antibiotics and…”

“Aren’t you going to introduce us?”

Alec was grinning now, standing directly in front of them and eyeing up Q with a hungry glint in his eye. James wrapped his arm around Q comfortingly when he felt his shoulders tense up.

“Fortescue, this is Alec Trevelyan. Alec, this is Fortescue.”

"Oh, isn't he a little minx?"

Before James could stop him, Alec reached out and pinched Q’s cheek, making the felin recoil. James reacted on instinct and immediately slapped Alec’s hand away.

“Keep your fucking hands off him.” James kept his voice low and menacing.

Alec held his unbandaged hand up, totally unapologetic.

“Alright tiger! Bloody hellfire, protective much? Are you sure you’re not fucking him?” Alec laughed and James felt Q flinch.

James’s patience, which wore thin with Alec at the best of times, abruptly ran out. He stepped forward and pushed Q behind him, intent on beating some manners into the other agent. He’d barely moved before Conroy stepped in between them smartly. She was a good head shorter than the two agents but she squared up to them without hesitation.

“Oh no you don’t! Not in my department! 006! 007! Stand down! Trevelyan! Go back to your room this instant. Bond, leave it! Calm down!”

Trevelyan stepped away, still laughing as James turned back to Q. The felin had taken a step back and was watching Alec worriedly. 

“It’s OK Q. Come here. It’s OK.” Q stepped forward and embraced James again. James wrapped his arms around him and kissed to top of his head. “I’m sorry. He was being an arsehole. Did he frighten you?” Q shook his head.

“No. Well… maybe a little. I thought he was going to fight you though. I didn’t like that at all.”

James snorted.

“It wouldn’t have been much of a fight. He can’t beat me with both hands...” He watched as Alec disappeared into one of the patient rooms down the hall. “What were you saying about tablets?”

Conroy cut in.

“Q still has a slight sign of infection. Nothing major, nothing to warrant him staying here certainly, so I’ve given him a course of antibiotics for him to take over the next few days. There’s some painkillers in there too should he need them. He should feel as right as rain in a couple of days but I want him to complete the course regardless. In the meantime, lots of fluids, lots of rest, lots of warmth. Let me know if anything concerns you.” 

James nodded with a smile. 

“I think we can manage that.” He reached into his pocket. “I’m sorry Q but this is for you.” He pulled out a collar and leash. They were made of a blue, cheap-looking material. “This is only temporary but I thought they’d do to get you home with.” Conroy watched as Q tilted his head obediently and allowed James to buckle up the collar around his neck. “I’ll get you something nicer, I promise.” Q reached up and felt along the edge of the collar.

“This is nice. It’s soft. It’s not too tight like the other one.” He said with a smile.

“I hate that you have to wear one.” James said darkly. Q raised an eyebrow.

“It’s the law James.”

“I know.” He replied, slipping two fingers under the collar to check it really wasn’t too tight. “I don’t have to like it though.”

They said their goodbyes to Conroy and she made Q promise that he would visit again soon. He looked to James for permission before telling her he’d love to. James got the feeling that Conroy and her staff had grown quite fond of his felin over the past few days. Slipping the leash over his wrist he took Q’s hand and led him down to the carpark. It was only once they were in the car and heading to James’s flat that he realised how quiet Q was.

“What’s up kitten? Are you feeling alright?”

“I’m fine.” There was a pause and then; “Doctor Conroy… Susan… She called you 007.”

“That’s right.” James said cautiously, wondering what Q was getting at.

“And that man Alec. He’s 006.”

“He is.”

“Is he your friend?”

James sighed and stared at the road ahead.

“I’ve known Alec for a very long time. Do you know what a Double 0 designation means?”

“I remember father talking about it. It means that you’re an assassin doesn’t it?”

“Sometimes. Assassin is a dangerous word. I think it can run the risk of romanticizing what we do. We’re killers. Spies. Liars. Cheats. Whores, if it calls for it. Being a Double 0 means we will do anything and everything asked of us to get the job done and it means that we can largely operate without being held to account. It’s a dangerous line we walk.”

“How so?”

James thought for a moment.

“Alec and I were in the Navy together and we were recruited to MI6 within months of each other. Alec was promoted to the Double 0 program just after me.” James slowed the car at a set of traffic lights. “We were firm friends. Whenever we were off mission we would hang out together, go to dinner, hit the town looking to pick up girls… we were known as the ‘terrible twosome’ in some circles for our partying habits.” James grinned at the memories that popped into his head… and then he frowned. He put the car into first gear and pulled away when the lights turned green. “After a couple of years of working in the field Alec started to change. He began acting rashly. The first time I noticed it, we were out on the lash and a guy tried to cut in front of us in a nightclub queue. Alec beat him bloody before I could pull him off. He started being aggressive to strangers for very little reason – someone he thought was looking at him funny or being rude. We’d try for a fun night out and we’d end up in police cells time after time…" James paused and then sighed. "Then he was accused of raping a girl he’d picked up on a night out. I wanted to defend him, I really did, but I just wasn’t sure enough that he was innocent. He denied any wrong-doing and M saw to it that things were smoothed over for him but that was the final straw for me. I’d had enough. I wanted to unwind during my downtime, not pick fights or seek confrontation. I stopped seeing him socially and he’s never really forgiven me.”

“Why did he get like that do you think?”

“To do our job successfully you have to compartmentalise your life. When I'm on mission I am 007. I investigate, I sleep with people to gain data, I kill if needs be. I’ve learned to ignore my conscience to get a job done if needs be. I dismiss sentimentality and lock down any compassion I might feel. I follow orders above all else. I am a tool. When I get back to London though, I try to just be James again. It’s important to me that I regain my sense of self. Identity. It’s not always easy, I recognise that, but I try very hard. Why is Alec the way he is? I think he’s stopped trying. I think that in many way 006 has taken over the Alec Trevelyan that I knew. I loved Alec but he’s been engulfed by the agent and I don’t like that man at all.”

He looked down when he felt a pressure on his thigh and saw that Q had rested his hand there comfortingly.

“I hope I can help you to be James in some little way.”

He smiled over at him.

“I think you will. I think you’ll help me very much.”

They fell into a companionable silence for the rest of the drive. Q was yawning as James pulled into the driveway of his home. James picked up his bags off the back seat and then helped the felin out. He tottered slightly so James slipped his hand around his waist and helped him up to the flat. Once inside Q lingered in the hallway as if unsure what to do. James took off his coat and then unbuckled Q’s collar.

“I don’t want you wearing this unless we’re going outside.” Q’s neck was looking much better after a few days without a collar but it still looked a little sore in places. “What would you like to do now?”

Q had been gazing up the hallway but at James’s question he blinked and shrugged.

“I don’t know. What would you like me to do?”

James frowned a little. Q was beginning to look stressed.

“Well…” he started, “you can watch telly, have something to eat, read a book if you like, have a cup of tea...”

Q shook his head and James didn’t miss the way his tail started to twitch anxiously.

“I don’t know.” Q said and he began to shiver a little. “I don’t know what to do.”

“Hey… come on.” James pulled him in for a hug and Q nestled into his chest gratefully. “Has it really been so long?” He asked gently. “It must have been so long since someone let you do what you wanted.” Q sniffed and James immediately felt like a fool for not realising it sooner. Q had been so happy in Medical after a few days of care that he’d started to relax but coming back to the flat… the change in situation must have unnerved him again. James hugged him tight and vowed not to make such a mistake again. Q was the victim of terrible abuse at the hands of his last owner and for a moment James had let himself forget that fact. He would begin to recover eventually – he already had in many ways - he just need a little time. James gave him one last squeeze and then pulled away. Q looked almost tearful. “Come with me. I have something to show you.” He led Q down the hallway to the bedroom next to his, the room he’d cleared out. Q’s eyes widened when he saw the single bed all made up ready for him.

“This is your room now Q. You have your own bed and there’s a built in wardrobe where we can put your clothes. There’s room in the corner for a desk if you’d like and I can get you a lamp and a chair.” Q looked stunned. “You can come in here whenever you like. I won’t be offended if you want to come in here and work on your notes or just be alone. You can use the bathroom whenever you like. I’m going to have a cup of tea and read a book or something in the lounge. You can do what you want. Have a lie down for a while if you like…”

“I’d like to wash.” He said quietly. “I smell of Medical so I would like to have a wash and maybe put on some fresh clothes?”

“OK. Here…” He opened the wardrobe and took out the sweatpants and t-shirt Q had worn on his first night with James. James had brought them home after Q had been admitted and washed them for him. “Are these any good?” Q smiled, it was a timid little twitch really, and he nodded.

“Yes please.”

“Alright then. I’ll leave you to it.”

“Can… can I come and sit with you when I’m finished?”

James smiled.

“Of course you can.”

 

~00Q~

 

When Q padded into the lounge, clean and damp-haired, James was sitting on the sofa. His bare feet were resting on the coffee table and he had his laptop resting on his thighs.

Which he was currently stabbing at with two fingers.

“Fucking useless piece of bloody shite…” He muttered, wondering whether to just take the battery out of the back to restart it. Again. He looked up to see Q smiling at him.

“Problems?”

“This sodding thing. I’d forgotten how slow my bloody laptop was. I should have taken it to the boffins at Tech Services weeks ago…”

“May I see it please?”

James patted the seat next to him.

“Do your worst.” Q settled down and took the laptop from him. James grinned as he started to type. His fingers flew over the keys rapidly. James watched him for a minute and then got up. “I’m going to make some tea.” By the time he went back in, with a mug of tea for Q and one of coffee for himself, Q was sitting quietly looking rather smug. “Any good?”

“Fixed it.”

James put the drinks on the table as he sat down and looked at the screen. It showed the home page.

“Am I likely to understand anything that you’ve just done to it?”

Q smiled and tilted his head to one side as if thinking.

“I removed a virus but other than that, no. Probably not.” He smiled.

James slung his arm around him and kissed his temple. 

“Such a clever boy.”

Instead of blushing at the compliment like James thought he might, Q stiffened.

“Sorry. Did I say the wrong thing?”

Q shrugged, looking uncomfortable.

“Sorry… it’s… He used to call me that. It’s silly…”

James kissed him again and squeezed him.

“It’s not silly. I’ll try to remember not to call you that again.”

Q shifted, pressing himself into James’s side.

“No, it’s fine. It just took me by surprise that’s all. I don’t want you pussyfooting around me. I’d rather learn to get over it.”

James coughed and tried to turn away as a snort of laughter escaped him. Q looked blank and then gaped at him, smiling as he dug his elbow into James’s ribs.

“You bastard! You’re laughing at me.”

James couldn’t help it. He knew he shouldn’t laugh but it had just tickled him and now he was laughing so much he couldn’t stop. Eventually Q joined in, still looking confused.

“Pussyfooting!” James finally gasped, tears springing to his eyes. “Oh God! I’m sorry. I’m so sorry! God, that tickled me.” He carried on chuckling for several minutes and took a swig of his coffee to try to compose himself. Once he’d calmed down he sat back and told Q to open the internet browser.

“Ahem! Sorry about that. Right then. Type in ‘flannel.com’.”

Q did as he was told. A homepage with several nattily dressed men on it came up.

“What’s this?” Q asked.

“A clothing site. I use it myself for my casual clothes. I want to buy you some nice things.”

Q looked unsure.

“You’ve already got me clothes…” He said dubiously.

“One outfit and some sweats is hardly a full wardrobe.” James said. “If you’re going to be my companion I want you to look nice for when we visit MI6 and I want you to be comfortable hanging around here. I’ll take you my tailor when you’re feeling better too. I want to get a couple of suits for you. I can’t have you in sweatpants in the kind of restaurants I like to go to.”

“You’re very generous.” Q said quietly.

“It’s all quite selfish really,” James grinned. “You’re a handsome lad. I want to make people jealous that you’re with me.” This time Q did blush and it really was quite adorable.

They spent a merry hour picking out clothing and shoes. Q was worried he was spending too much of James’s money when he found a cardigan he liked which cost several hundred pounds but James gently encouraged him to add it to the virtual basket. He didn’t have many opportunities to spend his own money and he was enjoying treating Q to nice things. Eventually though James noticed that the felin’s head was beginning to nod. He took the laptop off him and paid for the order before shutting it down. He relaxed back onto the sofa and Q snuggled up to him, tucking his feet up onto the seat and wrapping his tail around them. James used the remote to turn on the TV. The channel was showing reruns of old Doctor Who episodes. It was halfway through the episode and the Doctor and Amy were busy chasing a large invisible something around the streets of a village with Vincent Van Gogh. Q, whose eyes had been sliding shut, briefly perked up.

“Is that the Doctor?” He asked.

“It is. Did you use to watch this?”

“I did! I loved it. I used to watch it with my father. I don’t know this actor though…”

“He’s not bad. A bit crazy like John Pertwee was. I like him.”

They sat and watched the rest of the episode in silence. James hadn’t seen this one before but he thought the ending was rather moving. When he looked down to see if Q had enjoyed it James realised that he was fast asleep. He slid his arm around him and, slouching down to get comfortable, waited for the next episode…

When he woke up it was starting to get dark outside. He shifted to get the kink out of his neck and smiled when Q muttered in his sleep. He had slipped down and now had his head in James’s lap. He was sprawled on his back with his legs akimbo. His t-shirt had rucked up and James’s hand rested on its hem, cupping the bottom of his ribs. He looked so comfortable. James flexed his fingers, enjoying the smooth warmth of Q’s skin. At his touch the felin’s long black tail flicked. He stroked again and grinned when he got the same response. He studied his face. He was such a pretty thing. James wondered what kind of man Tiago was to be so cruel to such a delicate creature. He wasn’t the only one though. He frowned when he remembered Alec’s words. James wouldn’t ever take advantage of Q – or any slave – like that… he could never… 

Q’s sweatpants were low-slung, worn on his hips to accommodate his tail. James could see where his pubic hair began just below his navel. He’d seen him naked and knew that the fur surrounding his cock wasn’t like a human’s. It was much finer and straighter. James knew that if he were to slide his fingers down Q’s belly and into the hair there it would feel warm and soft. He shook his head slightly, trying to stop his chain of thought. No. He would never touch Q that way. Q had been entrusted to him and he’d had suffered enough through people taking advantage of him. He would try his best to be a good man for him. Q shifted again and his eyes opened. He saw that James was looking at him and he smiled.

“Hello.”

“Hello sleepy boy. How are you feeling?”

“Better. Do I have to get up now?”

“Not if you don’t want to. Do you want something to eat?”

Q stretched lazily and shook his head.

“Not just yet. I’m too comfy.”

James smiled. It was a small thing but it was the first time that Q hadn’t instantly gone along with something James had suggested. Q’s eyes slid shut again and James stayed smiling as Q shifted so he could rest his hand on top of his.


	7. i.vii

It was a full week later that Q and James returned to MI6 for Q’s first proper debriefing.

James understood from Tanner that they’d tried to question Q when they first picked him up but he’d been too distressed to speak. It was hoped that with James there they might be able to get some useful details out of him about the man who took him. First though, they made a quick visit to Medical.

Conroy was thrilled to see him again and kept commenting on how well he looked. James stood back a little as they chatted and he had to concede that she had a point. Q had dressed carefully that morning, trying on almost every item of clothing that had been delivered that week, before settling on a checked pair of trousers, a simple white shirt and dark blue tie. Q’s trousers sat high on his waist and, unlike his jeans which were low-slung, they had a little opening at the back to accommodate his tail. He had topped his outfit off with the outrageously expensive cardigan that James had encouraged him to buy. It was a dark mustard colour edged in dark blue and burgundy. It shouldn’t have worked, or even suited him, but James had to admit it fitted him perfectly and accented his lithe frame. As Q told Conroy all about his room and the desk James had ordered for him, he stood back and admired him. He couldn’t wait to take Q to visit his tailor. He was going to look gorgeous in a bespoke suit. He glanced at his watch and reluctantly cut into their conversation.

“Q? Sorry, we need to go.”

Conroy looked disappointed.

“So soon? I’d hoped you might stop and have a cup of tea with me.”

“Sorry Susan,” Q said, “We have to go and see M.”

“That’s fine. You make sure you come back to see me some time though.”

Q promised to and then took James’s hand again. They’d dispensed with his lead once they were in the building but James noticed that he still liked to stay close to him.

He didn’t mind at all.

“That was a close one.” Q said quietly as they waited for the lift.

“How so?”

“I like Susan but she makes terrible tea.”

James snorted with laughter.

“Not as good as mine then?”

“Not by a mile! It was the worst thing about being stuck in there.” He smiled. The lift arrived and James led them in. “That, and not getting to be with you.” He added after a beat.  The last words were quietly spoken and when James turned to face Q his cheeks were blush pink.

“You know that we’ll be apart a fair bit when I go back to active duty, don’t you?” James asked gently.

“I know. I just like it when we’re together.” Q dropped his head then coyly. James squeezed his hand.

“You know what? Me too.”

M was waiting for them in the outer office when they got there, chatting with Tanner. The canin had told James he would be there to make notes so he wasn’t surprised to see him. They went into M’s office and the door was locked. M sat behind her desk with James and Q facing her. Tanner sat to one side with a notepad and small Dictaphone.

“Tanner is going to record this to make sure we don’t miss anything but this is an unofficial meeting. None of this will be going on any permanent record.” Bond nodded. Strictly speaking Q was at risk and until they tracked down the man who took him, he would remain so. “First of all, I have something I would like to show you Q. Do you know this man?” She opened the file that lay in front of her. It seemed to be a standard personnel file. It looked very much like James’s own but with one significant difference. This one had ‘DECEASED’ stamped across it in bold red letters. She took a photograph out of the file and slid it across the table towards Q who picked it up with trembling fingers.

“This…” His voice caught and he cleared his throat. “This is the man that took me. Tiago.” He pushed the photo back towards M and James didn’t miss the way he then lowered his hands to his lap and wiped his fingers on his trousers. It was as if handling the photo had made his hands feel dirty.

“It’s as I suspected.” M said with a frown. “Tiago Rodrigues was one of my best agents. I worked alongside him in Hong Kong from eighty-six to ninety-seven. We began to suspect that he was working to his own agenda and it was during the transition from British colony to special administrative region that our suspicions were confirmed. We found out he’d been hacking the Chinese. As a show of good faith we gave him up and exchanged him for several prisoners held by the Chinese government at that time.” James raised an eyebrow. “It was the right thing to do and I’d do it again in a heartbeat. We regained several agents and allies in the deal. We were informed six months later that he’d died in custody but the Chinese were unable to provide us with a body. When you told me Q had been taken and made to work on a powerful computer it seemed too much of a coincidence…”

“He talked about you a lot.” Q said. “At least, I think it was you. He kept talking about his mother living in her ivory tower in Vauxhall…”

“That bastard.” She snapped and James watched as Q flinched. “Always going on about my age. I think he was jealous of my position and constantly tried to belittle my status by referring to me as his mother.” Q looked uncomfortable, no doubt worrying he’d said the wrong thing. James reached over and rested his hand on his thigh, squeezing it gently. When Q glanced over James gave him a small smile of reassurance. M must have noticed their interaction. “I’m very sorry that you had to spend so long at the mercy of that man. I’d rather like to get my hands on the slippery swine. What I’d like from you is some help in tracking him down. What can you tell us about your time with him?”

Q began to speak and James realised with growing horror exactly how far he’d underestimated how badly he’d been abused. He said he found Boothroyd when he went to take him his morning tea and called for an ambulance when he found him unresponsive. He was sure he was dead but didn’t know what else to do. He was questioned by the police and taken to the rehoming centre but didn’t remember much after that before waking up on a private jet.

“I was disorientated. He’d collared me and chained me to an anchor set into the floor. I had a food bowl. He treated me like an animal. A pet.”

They were in the air for hours before Tiago had one of his men inject him with something. When he woke up they were on a ruined island. Q was put into a cage. And was lied to.

“Tiago told me that my father wasn’t dead. He told me that it was all a ruse. He’d just stolen me halfway across the planet so I thought it was more than possible. He said he wanted me to work for him and told me that Father would die if I didn’t comply.” Q hung his head. “So I complied.”

James sat with growing unease as Q carried on speaking about what he was made to do. The computer he helped to build, the systems he hacked. If he ever tried to disobey Tiago he was punished. At first there were threats to Boothroyd. When Q began to question whether he was even still alive Tiago started to have him beaten. And then waterboarded. And then stripped and humiliated. Tears began to fall from his closed eyes and his voice fell to a whisper as he tried to recount his worst experience.

“He wanted me to hack into a missile control centre. I refused. I said I didn’t want any part of murder. He told me then that I was already a murderer. My father had been killed because of me. While I was still reeling from that he said that he was going to show me what happened to disobedient boys. He… he…”

He started to cry so James squeezed his leg again, hoping to reassure him.

“You don’t have to…”

Q suddenly turned on him angrily.

“I do have to!” He shouted, his voice shockingly loud in the small room. “I have to tell you why I did what I did! Why I did what he told me to! He took everything from me! My dignity! My happiness! My vir…” He stuttered and then jumped up and ran to the door. He wrestled with the handle, trying desperately to flee. James followed him and in two steps had him in his arms.

“Q… please.” Q wailed and then slumped into James’s embrace. He hugged him in tight. “Come on sweetheart.” He saw M was on the phone and Tanner… Tanner looked horrified. James guessed that the canin was just beginning to realise how blessed he’d been. He’d been loved. Respected. Freed. Q had been used and abused. He turned his face into Q’s neck and held him close, waiting for his sobs to subside. They stood like that for a few minutes, Q slowly calming as James stroked his back. There was a quiet knock at the door and Q let James lead him back to his seat as Tanner jumped up to answer it. It was M’s secretary with a tray which he took off her. Once Q was seated James knelt between his thighs, keeping his hands on him. He stroked his cheek, cupping his jaw. He looked haunted and James wished he could do something to help. There was a clink as Tanner set a cup on the edge of the desk next to them.

“Tea.” He murmured.

James smiled.

“There you go.” He told Q. “Cup of tea. Makes everything better.” He quipped softly.

Q huffed an almost-laugh and nodded.

“That’s just so fucking British.” He was still shaking so James stayed where he was for a few moments more. Finally, Q straightened himself up with a little flex of his shoulders. “I’m sorry.” He said to M in a calm voice. “I’m still finding it difficult to think about what he did.”

“How about we focus on what he had you do rather than his methods of forcing you to do them?” M asked gently. “I don’t doubt for a moment that everything you did, you did under duress.” James watched her with interest. She rarely seemed so compassionate. Q nodded and James sat back in his own chair as he reached for his cup of tea with a trembling hand. He took a sip. “I think it might be best if I send you down to see our quartermaster.” She continued. “Do you think you could give him the technical details of the computer you were asked to build? The sites you were made to hack?” Q said he thought he could. M then smiled at him. “Geoffrey Boothroyd was a good friend of mine you know.” Q looked amazed and James silently thanked her for distracting him from thinking about Tiago for a few minutes. “It was me that convinced him to take a slave. He had lost his wife and I thought a companion would do him good. Did you know he went to the shelter to find a canin though?”

“I didn’t, no.” Q said quietly. “He told me he’d chosen my mother because he wanted some company but he didn’t mention wanting a canin. All he would say was that as soon as he saw her he just knew she was the one for him.” He stared into his tea cup. “Before she died she managed to give birth to all three of us, me and my two sisters. Both of my sisters died soon afterwards but I seemed okay. Father told me she managed to hold me for a few minutes and that right before she died she took his hand and begged him to take care of me. She… she said life would be cruel to me. People wouldn’t want me because they thought that Blacktails were unlucky so he would just have to keep me. She was right. I never felt unlucky with him until the day he died…”

James placed his hand on Q’s back.

“I think your days of being unlucky are all over now.” James said reassuringly.

Q gave him a bittersweet smile and James was struck by just how beautiful he was. The skin under his eyes looked bruised and he was far too thin but his sharp teeth gleamed white against the ruby red of his lips. His eyes sparkled with the sheen of his recent tears. James thought how easy it would be to fall in love with him. “I swear to you. They’re over.”

~00Q~

Bundled up against the cold December air, James walked with Q through the streets of Soho. The felin carried a cardboard cup of hot chocolate in the hand which wasn’t holding onto James’s and was sipping at it, gazing at all the Christmas lights as they strolled. It felt good to be out in the open after being in the recycled atmosphere of headquarters for most of the day. It had been a day well spent though.

After being with M for over an hour they’d gone down to see Beaumont, MI6’s chief quartermaster and Q had once again surprised James. They’d been standing with Tanner, waiting to introduce Q when the felin had suddenly joined in the conversation that Beaumont was having with one of his technicians. They were discussing how a prototype distress radio signaller was still too large. They’d almost finished when Q suddenly piped up;

“It’s simple. You need to reduce to size of the battery.”

Beaumont had turned to him with a quizzical look on his face.

“Oh? Is that so? And how do you propose to get the unit functioning on such a reduced power source, young chap? A constant transmission using a smaller battery would expire within a few minutes.”

“Why does it need to be a constant transmission? Why can’t it be intermittent?”

“It would need to be traceable over several hundred square miles at least.”

“So program the unit to give out two, maybe three full strength pings to notify the tracking software which vector to scan initially and then to ping every thirty or even sixty seconds at a lower strength in case the person signalling moves.”

Beaumont stared at Q like he’d grown an extra head and then turned to his technician.

“Why didn’t you think of that?”

Tanner introduced Q properly and then they went to Beaumont’s office. They sat for hours as Q painstakingly went through everything he could remember. By the end of it he looked worn out but pleased that he was doing the right thing by helping MI6 to track Rodrigues down. Rather than take him straight home afterwards, James had told him they had something special to pick up as a treat, if he'd like to take a walk. Tired as he was, Q had jumped at the chance of some fresh air and exercise.

When they arrived at the shop James needed to visit, Q paused for a moment.

“In here?” The shop was called ‘Intimate Delights’ and the windows were obscured by murals depicting traditional tattoo-style birds, flowers and hearts. There was a large notice above the front door which warned that you had to be over eighteen to enter. “James, is this a sex shop?” He asked dubiously.

James laughed.

“I’m afraid so. Are you terribly offended? It’s just that the lady I need to see has her workshop in here.”

“Okay…” Q said slowly, still doubtful.

James led him into the shop which in point of fact, was more like a collective of smaller shops. The sex shop on the ground floor was run by a lady called Jewel and contained all the kinds of things you expected to find in one. Books, magazines, DVDs, toys and the like. There was a small workshop out the back where James’s old friend Jenny worked. On the next two floors there was a clothing section, a tantric masseuse and a tattoo parlour. It was Jenny that James had an appointment with that day. Letting go of Q’s hand and leash, he walked over to ask Jewel to tell Jenny he was there.

“She’s with someone doing a fitting. She won’t be long.”

He turned around, expecting to see Q standing close behind him but he’d wandered off and was staring up at a screen that hung from the ceiling over a rack of DVDs. He had a look of complete confusion on his face. Strolling over to see what he was watching James saw the video was of two men fucking. Q seemed on edge, his tail was back in his hands which was a sure sign he wasn’t happy.

“Hey kitten…” James soothed. He stepped up behind him and slid his hand around his waist. “What are you watching?”

Q immediately leaned back into his embrace.

“I don’t understand it.” He whispered, his eyes never leaving the screen. “The man on his knees… the one being fucked. Does he like it?”

James watched the screen. The young man in question was on all fours, his back arched, as his partner thrust into him. The camera angle changed and it was clear that he was rock hard. James chuckled.

“It certainly looks that way.”

“But how?” Q shifted as if he was uncomfortable. “How can he like it when it hurts so much?”

All James’s amusement fled when he realised what Q was saying. Q had been abused by Tiago’s men. Raped. And they must have hurt him. Every. Damn. Time.

“Oh sweetheart. It’s because it’s not hurting him. When it’s done right, with care and gentleness, it can feel wonderfully pleasurable.”

“I’ve never had that.” Q said quietly and James felt like his heart was going to break. He kissed the side of Q’s face. “Have you ever? With men, I mean?”

James nuzzled in and nodded.

“Yes.”

“And which one were you?”

“I’ve been both in my time.” He answered honestly. “I’ve enjoyed giving and taking equally.”

“You could fuck me like that if you wanted.” Q suddenly said after a moment’s silence between them. “I’ve worried how I could ever repay you for all your kindness but if you like fucking boys you could do that to me.”

James gently cupped Q’s face and turned him around.

“I will never take advantage of you like that.” He vowed. “While you’re mine I’m going to take care of you and in return all I ask is that you keep me company and share my life with me.”

“But…” Q tried to turn his head to look at the screen again but James stopped him with a chaste kiss to the side of his mouth.

“No Q. I won’t. I own you and legally, as long as you are a slave in the eyes of the law, you have no rights. If you don’t have any of the rights of a free person, you cannot give me consent. You legally have no consent to give.”

“What if I wanted you to?”

James shook his head and pulled him into a hug.

“No kitten.”

They were interrupted by a cough. James looked up to see Jenny standing next to them with a smile on her face.

“So. New pet?”

“This is Q.”

She smiled at him.

“I really don’t approve of slavery but I have to admit. Seeing Q could change a girl’s mind.”

“He was a gift. And I mean that in every sense.”

Q blushed and Jenny laughed as she led them back to her small workshop. It was cosy and smelt strongly of leather. Once inside she took a box down off the racking which overhung her workbench.

“I think this must be for you Q.”

His eyes widened as he saw what was in the box.

“Oh James. It’s beautiful.” He reached in and took out the black leather collar. It gleamed in the artificial light and moved fluidly in his hands. “It’s so soft.” He turned over the small metal disk which hung from it. On one side it said ‘Property of James Bond’ and a mobile phone number. On the other simply ‘Q’

“Jenny is the best leathersmith I know. She’s been making my holsters for years.”

Q held the collar out to him.

“Will you put it on me?”

James pulled aside Q’s scarf and quickly unbuckled the cheap collar they’d been using. Taking the new collar he looped it around Q’s neck and carefully did it up. It was quite loose and sat comfortably at the base of his throat. Jenny then handed him a matching leash which he clipped onto the D-ring. Before James could pull away Q wound his arms round his neck and kissed him softly on the lips before hugging him tightly.

“Thank you James. Thank you. I feel like I’m really yours now.”

James held onto him, knowing exactly how he felt. It was starting to feel like Q really belonged to him now too.

He couldn’t ever remember feeling so happy.


	8. Interlude;  A Visit to Skyfall

The first three months of owning Q flew by.

James watched with great pleasure as the frightened felin slowly reverted to something closer to his true character. He was funny, affectionate and so, so clever. He was eager to please James and tried his hardest to look after the agent in return for his kindness in whatever small ways he could. James discovered that Q enjoyed doing anything that was useful and kept him busy, not only working on his notes and inventions but also cleaning around the flat and cooking. He was a surprisingly good cook (if you didn’t mind that all the meals he produced tended to have a rather large meat to vegetable ratio) and James indulged him by buying in whatever ingredients he asked for… except for on Saturday nights. On Saturdays James always made a point of taking Q out to a KFC restaurant somewhere so he could have his favourite chicken.

Once a week James took Q to MI6. He would spend the morning with Beaumont helping him out in R&D and in the afternoon he would keep an appointment with Doctor Hall, one of the resident psychiatrists. James resisted the urge to ask Q how these confidential sessions went but he would have been a fool not to notice how quiet and clingy he would be on the days that followed them. James happily indulged him with extra hugs and attention after the sessions but discouraged Q from trying to share James’s bed. He was resolute in his promise not to take advantage of Q sexually but on the nights that his nightmares woke him up, James would often find himself sitting on the side of Q’s bed, soothing him back to sleep.

M had kept James up to date with MI6’s efforts to find Q’s former owner. From the details that Q could remember they managed to track down the island that he’d been held prisoner on. It lay nine miles off the coast of Nagasaki, in southern Japan, and was nicknamed ‘Gunkanjima’ (‘Battleship Island’) by the locals. 003 had been sent there to see what she could find but reported back that it was deserted. There was no sign of the computer equipment that Q had described and no clue as to where Rodrigues had moved his operations to after his short spell at the house in Solihull.

Although he wasn’t happy at the prospect of leaving Q alone, James realised that his return to field service was inevitable and the appropriate arrangements were made for his status to revert to ‘active’ on the first of March. James explained to Q that he might not be sent on mission that day, or even that week, but he needed to be prepared for when James wasn’t there. Even though he was outwardly supportive, James could see that the idea of being left alone upset Q, so to distract him he arranged for them to go away for a few days a couple of weeks beforehand.

James had thought that the trip he had in mind for Q would be fun but there was a small problem. Q had told James about the fateful flight he’d taken when Rodrigues stole him away him to Japan but he’d neglected to tell him about his absolute terror of flying. He’d seemed nervous getting onto the private jet that James had arranged to take them to Glasgow but his nerves soon threatened to morph into outright panic as the engines cycled up on the runway. James reacted calmly by holding Q firmly during take-off and once they were in the air, leading him to the cockpit. He sat the trembling felin down in the co-pilot seat and crouched down next to him. He then gently encouraged him to ask the pilot (who happened to be an old friend of James’s from his Fleet Air Arm days) any questions he liked about the instrumentation and specifications of the plane. By the time they landed, just over an hour later, Q was chatting merrily about aerodynamics and quite forgetting he was supposed to be scared.

There was a small, shabby vehicle rental desk at the airport that tended to be overlooked by the general public. James went straight to it and interrupted the bored-looking assistant sitting there reading a copy of ‘Closer’ magazine by sliding a ‘Universal Exports’ business card across the counter towards her. She brightened up considerably when she saw it, immediately straightening up to efficiently produce the necessary documents for his ‘hire car’ and handing over the keys to the brand new, top of the line, Range Rover that was waiting for them in the carpark.

There certainly were perks to working for MI6 on occasions.

The weather hadn’t been good for a week or so and James was glad the car was a four by four when it began snowing again. By the time they were on the road to Fort William it was falling thick and fast and James had to keep a sharp eye out for the small side road which would take them the last five miles of their journey. Q was mostly silent as they travelled, watching with wide eyes at the fat flakes as they fell around them. He was bundled up warm against the cold in a high-necked striped jumper and fake fur-trimmed parka; his sensitive ears hidden under a thick woolly knitted hat. James thought he looked as cute as a button but resisted the urge to tell him. Q was beginning to come out of his shell now and James didn’t want him to feel like he was belittling him. Perhaps a better word to describe him would have been ‘remarkable’. It was true that James had made every effort to be kind to the young felin but even so, he was amazed every single day at how well and how far he had come. He was inordinately proud of him and couldn’t wait to show him off to Marnie and Kincade.

He looked around as they neared the end of the road they were on and then slowed the car to a stop. He pointed out of his side window.

“Look Q. The first view of Skyfall.”

Q looked out of the window eagerly, craning his neck to see past James.

“Ooh. It does look rather dour.”

James had told Q previously how he had never really liked the house after his parents died. He’d moved in with Kincade when he and Marnie became his guardians and had only used Skyfall on a couple of occasions since then.

“That’s where we’re going.” James said, pointing to a small cottage which stood in the glen a little way back from the main house. “You’ll like it there.”

He put the car back into gear and slowly drove it down the driveway. As they approached the little house the front door opened and a familiar figure stepped out. James felt a swell of emotion as he recognised Kincade. The felin looked old now and although his thick ginger tail was now shot through with greying hair it was still magnificent. He parked and rushed out to greet him, almost running to reach him for a hug. Kincade wrapped his arms around him and held him tight, his deep rumbling purr sending shivers through James. He pressed his cheek to his and breathed in the familiar scent of soap and wood-fire.

“There you are Jamie! The missus and I had wondered where you’d got to.” The old felin said in his rough Scottish burr.

“Sorry Kincade. The roads were slow with all the snow.”

“Is this your boy?” Kincade asked, pulling away and looking over James’s shoulder at Q. He chuckled. “You’ve been keeping secrets. Marnie’s going to go spare at you.”

James grinned as he took a couple of steps back and put his arm out to Q.

“This is Fortescue but he prefers to be called Q.” Q ducked into James’s side shyly and he gave him a brief squeeze before patting his back. “Go on Q. Say hello to Kincade.” He gave James one last look and then bashfully approached Kincade. The older felin held out his hands and Q took them nervously.

“You’re very welcome to my home laddie.” He said with a smile. He ducked forward and brushed their cheeks together in a friendly manner. “Why don’t you both come in before we all freeze to death?”

They trooped inside and discarded their boots and outer clothing in the hallway, leaving them where Kincade told them to. They then followed him through to the kitchen. Marnie was in there, leaning over and putting something in the oven, her long tail, every inch as black as Q’s, twitched out from beneath her skirt. Kincade called out to her.

“Come on dear, stop fussing with that. James and his young kit are here.”

“Just a moment!” She grumbled. “If I don’t stir it, it won’t be just right for…” She turned and the words seemed to drift away as she caught sight of Q. Her eyes glistened and James thought she might cry. “Oh Jamie,” She sighed, “You never told me he was a Blacktail!” She walked over to Q and placed her hands on his shoulders. “Look at you.” She said tenderly. “So handsome. You remind me of my brothers, so you do. Such a sweet face.” She cupped his jaw with her hand and studied him, a soft affectionate expression on her face, before she pressed her cheek to his. Q smiled and wrapped his arms around Marnie, nuzzling her back.

“Thank you for inviting me to stay.” He said to her quietly. “James has told me all about you. I’ve been looking forward to coming here for weeks.”

“You darling kit. You’re welcome. You’re so very welcome!” She released Q with a final kiss to his cheek and turned to James. “And you, Jamie Bond! Fancy not telling me the wee lad was a Blacktail!!” James grinned as he was hugged and he happily returned her affectionate nuzzles.

“I thought it would be a nice surprise for you.”

She kissed his cheek too.

“You know me so well.” She pulled back. “But you two must be tired! I’ll put the kettle on. Go on through to the lounge I’ll bring you in some tea presently.”

James led the way to the small, cosy front room and they made themselves comfortable on the sofa. Q looked a little confused.

“James, why is me being a Blacktail such a big deal to Marnie?” He asked in a low voice. “It’s not just because she’s one too is it?”

“No.” James said quietly. “Marnie was born into a litter with four brothers, all Blacktails. They were all owned by the same man for almost fifteen years until he died. In the estate sale she was sold to my grandfather but her brothers all went to another man who was intending to set up a farm to raise horses in Nova Scotia.”

“That’s terrible.” Said Q sadly. “To have known them for so long before being parted. Has she ever thought of trying to track them down?”

James leaned in, lowering his voice even further.

“Kincade asked me to find out what happened to them a few years ago. They’ve all passed. One of them died on the boat on the journey to Canada. Two were killed in accidents on the farm and the other died of cancer.”

Q’s eyes widened.

“Does she know?”

“No.” James said. “Kincade asked me not to tell her. He’d rather that she thought them alive and well somewhere.”

Q frowned.

“That’s so sad.”

“It is.”

Just at that moment Marnie bustled in with a loaded tray, closely followed by Kincade.

“Here we are then kittens. A lovely cup of tea for you both, a pile of sandwiches and a slice of my seed cake to keep you going until supper. Jamie’s favourite as I remember.” James smiled and nodded at Q. “Kincade’s just laid and lit the fire in your room for the night. I hope you don’t mind but there’s just the one room for you both. The little bedroom in the attic isn’t fit to be used at this time of year.”

“Aye. It’s colder than a witch’s teat in there.” Kincade agreed solemnly. Marnie slapped him across the top of his arm.

“If you’re going to be coarse you’ll be better off staying silent in front of our guests!”

Kincade took the slice of cake she handed him without further comment but he winked at Q, smiling as he sat back in his chair.

~00Q~

James wasn’t sure he’d ever seen Q so happy.

They chatted over endless cups of tea before Marnie dished up a simply superb winter stew and dumplings followed by her wonderful rice pudding. It was every bit as delicious as he remembered and he gladly accepted a second helping even though it made him so full he felt fit to burst. Q ate well too. He was still a little underweight, a fact that was not missed by Marnie who spent the entire evening plying him with treats and snacks. By half-past ten Q’s eyes were threatening to slide shut as Marnie was showing him her collection of photographs of James as a child. When she went to open yet another album, James put a gentle hand on her arm.

“I think it’s time you let this lad get some sleep Marn.”

She smiled and nodded.

“Sorry my darling, of course. I’m just so thrilled to have you both here I don’t know when to stop prattling.” She kissed Q’s cheek, purring as he sleepily nuzzled her.

“Thank you for my lovely dinner and for showing me your photos Marnie. Will you show me the rest tomorrow please?”

“Aye. That I will.”

James held out his hand and helped to haul Q up out of his chair. He staggered a little, making them all laugh, Q included. They said goodnight to Kincade and made their way up to the spare room. As they entered Q paused.

“There’s only one bed.”

The room was quite small and it was dominated by the king-sized bed in the middle of it, covered in a red candlewick throw. There was a small sideboard and a couple of low bedside tables. At the foot of the bed, by the merrily crackling fire, was an old overstuffed armchair.

“I know. The other spare room is too cold.” James explained. “You have the bed. I’m going to sleep in the chair.”

Q frowned and his tail began to wag.

“What? No. You shouldn’t have to. I can sleep in the chair. Or on the floor.”

“Q?”

“This isn’t right.”

He reached behind himself and caught his tail, letting it run through his fingers until he was holding onto the end. James knew the nervous tic well. Q was upset. He sat on the edge of the bed and patted the spot next to him.

“Come and sit with me for a minute kitten. Tell me what’s wrong.”

Q came over hesitantly and perched next to James.

“It’s stupid…” He started. He stopped speaking and James reached up to stroke his hair.

“Don’t say that.” James said gently. “Whatever this is, it’s upset you.”

“It’s just…” Q stared at his tail which was still in his hands. “When I was with Tiago… sometimes… sometimes he would get angry with me and give me to his men so they could have some fun. To punish me. And they would… you know. And it was bad. It was always bad. But they would egg each other on and it would usually be quick…” He faltered and James smoothed his hand down to the back of Q’s neck, resting it there lightly, comfortingly. “But other times he… he would make me take a bath and then he would give me champagne to drink and I knew he drugged it. I always knew but I drank it anyway because I couldn’t bear the thought of him touching me without it… He would take hours. The whole night sometimes…” A tear slid down the side of his nose.

“He would take you in his bed.”

Q nodded.

“The rest of the time he treated me like a pet. He made me sleep in one of those cages that you can get for large dogs. I never got to be in a proper bed except…” He wiped his eyes on his sleeve. “When I came in here… for a second it looked so much like his… the size… the colour of the bedding…” He sighed. “I have my own bed now. I should be used to sleeping in one again.” He sighed, as if disappointed with himself. “I told you this was stupid…”

James pulled Q towards him gently and kissed his brow. After a moment, Q turned his body into him and he wrapped his arms around him.

“It’s not stupid and I know exactly what you mean. When I had the terrible beating that effectively vasectomised me, I was tied to a particular type of rattan chair. I almost screwed up a mission because of it a couple of years afterwards. I was supposed to be infiltrating a cartel in Mexico. I went to the meeting in a small café and throughout the whole fucking place; rattan fucking chairs as far as the eye could see. I was so jumpy I’m not surprised my contact didn’t trust me. Even now, ten years later, I can’t bring myself to sit on one willingly.”

“Does it get better?”

“It does. A little. Give it time.”

Q rested his head on James’s chest and sighed.

“I want it to be better now.”

“I know darling.”

They stayed like that for several more minutes before James began to suspect that Q was beginning to nod off. He gently jostled him.

“Come on sleepyhead. Go and use the bathroom.”

Q sleepily hunted out his toiletries bag and pyjamas and then left the room. When he returned James had turned down the bed covers. Q hesitated when he saw.

“Get in.” James said.

“I feel bad about you sleeping in the chair.” Q complained. “It’s not right. Let me sleep on the floor. I’m used to it.”

James frowned, knowing exactly why Q was used to it. Q noticed and immediately dropped his head like he’d done something wrong. Fighting the now familiar feeling of irritation at having reminded Q of something awful from his time with Tiago, he held out his hand to him.

“Come on kitten. I want you to be comfortable.” He said. “I can sleep just as well in the armchair. Look, Marnie’s even given me one of the blankets she knitted herself. I’ll be as warm as toast.”

Q still looked unsure as he walked over to the bed and got in.

“Are you sure James? We can share if you like…”

“No darling. You have it.”

The bed was big enough for them to share and not even touch but given what Q had just told him about the nights spent with Tiago… James’s skin crawled at the thought of ever reminding Q of that bastard. He wished, as he had a thousand times before, that he could get a hold of the man and punish him for what he’d done to Q. Q laid down and James tucked the covers around him, ensuring he was well-covered.

“Comfy?”

Q nodded and wriggled, burrowing down into the bedding.

“Please won’t you sleep here with me?”

James shook his head.

“No kitten. I’d only disturb you.”

“You’re so good to me.”

“You’re worth it.”

He kissed his forehead and then went to the door to turn off the main light. Seeing by the light of the fire James made his way over to the armchair and, not bothering to undress, settled down to sleep.

~00Q~

The door to the room crashed open and hit the sideboard hard enough to rattle the ornaments sitting on top of it. James was awake in an instant and standing. His sleep-addled brain took a moment to process what had happened. The fire was low. The light was on in the hallway. The bed was empty. The covers thrown back. Q was gone.  With a feeling of dread James hurtled out of the room and met Kincade who was tying the belt of his dressing gown in his bedroom’s doorway.

“What’s the to-do laddie?”

“I don’t know.” James answered curtly. “Q’s gone.” He pushed open the door to the bathroom. It was empty. He ran down the stairs. Hallway – empty. Lounge – empty. Kitchen… The kitchen was deserted but James could see one of the gas burners on the cooker was lit. A pan of milk sat next to it as if it had been moved off the heat. The back door stood open, freezing the little room as flakes of snow drifted in. He rushed out into the cold night air.

By the light of the moon he saw Q. He was kneeling in the snow in his pyjamas. Marnie was crouched beside him, her arm around his shoulders. James saw that he was crying and with a sound of distress he went to go to him… and was stopped by Kincade grabbing his wrist.

“Leave him for a spell.”

“But he’s upset.” James insisted.

“Aye. I can see that. But maybe this is the time you should leave it to Marnie. All the things he went through… and I’m guessing you haven’t told us nearly half of them… she’s the one person here who’ll understand what he’s feeling. She knows what it’s like to have been at the mercy of a cruel master.”

James watched her as she quietly talked to Q in a low soothing tone. He thought back to the stories his father had told him.

“The enforced bondings.” He said.

“Those are your grandfather’s words, James.” Kincade snapped in a quiet, angry voice. “It was rape she had to endure on his orders. Three times.” There was a pause and then Kincade tugged on his wrist. “Come on son. There’s no sense in us all freezing. Come back inside. They’ll come in when they’re ready.”

James nodded, walking backwards, unwilling to take his eyes off Q until they were back in the kitchen. Kincade shut the door and then went to the fridge.

“We couldn’t sleep so Marnie was down here making hot chocolate.” He took out a jug of milk. “I guess I’d best heat enough milk for four mugs now.”

Kincade busied himself at the stove as James sat at the kitchen table, watching the door like a hawk. Almost five minutes later Marnie came in, leading Q by the hand. He looked ashen. James was up and beside him in seconds. He was still crying and he let out a sob as James gathered him into a tight hug.

“Darling kitten. Whatever was the matter? Fucking hell you scared me!”

“Take him back to bed James. I’ll be up with cocoa and to build up your fire in a moment.” Marnie said.

James slowly led a still-crying Q up the stairs and back to their room. He was freezing and his thin pyjamas were wet from the snow. James stood him in front of the fire and undressed him before wrapping him in a towel. He rubbed his arms and legs, warming him as best he could. He knew that Q only had the one set of pyjamas with him so James quickly found one of his own t-shirts and put it on him. He carefully towelled the melting snow from his hair, taking care not to interfere with his ears too much. It was slow going. Q still seemed disconnected somehow and only interested in cuddling into James. When Q was as warm and dry as James thought he could get him he allowed him to snuggle in. He rested his chin on Q’s head as he pressed his face into James’s chest and swayed him slightly, smoothing his hand down his back. He was at a loss as to what had upset him so much.

There was a quiet knock at the door and Marnie came in with two mugs of hot chocolate. She set them down on the bedside table nearest to her and then came over to them. She rested one hand on the small of James’s back and with the other she stroked Q’s hair.

“How are you feeling now kit?”

Q shook his head, his grip on James momentarily tightening.

“I’m so sorry.” He whispered.

“Don’t you dare be sorry.” She said kindly. “There’s no one here that doesn’t love you.”

Q pulled back a little and wiped his eyes with the heel of his hand.

“I woke everyone up and…”

“Ah hush with you. Us two old farts barely sleep more than a few hours at a time these days and I don’t see Jamie here complaining. Now why don’t you two hop into bed and have that cocoa before it cools?” James was about to argue when she cut him off. “I would imagine that Q here could do with a bit of closeness just about now.”

James nodded. She was right of course. Q hadn’t stopped touching him since he came inside. There was no way he’d sleep if James resumed his spot on the chair. He led Q to the bed and sat him down. Q and Marnie watched as James stripped down to his boxer shorts and t-shirt before crawling over to the middle of the bed and holding his arm out. Q climbed in beside him and pressed himself into James’s side before he accepted one of the mugs from Marnie. James took the other and they sipped on their drinks as Marnie went to add some wood to their fire. It was blazing again in a few minutes and James could feel Q beginning to warm up. She fussed about, refolding the blanket onto the chair and collecting up Q’s wet pyjamas and the towel. When they had both finished their drinks they handed their mugs back to Marnie who put them on the bedside table before helping them to settle back down.

“Sleep now both of you. There’s no rush to be up in the morning. I’ll get you your breakfast whenever you’re ready.”

“Thank you Marnie.” James said. Q was silent and James had an idea he was still feeling delicate, a hair’s breadth away from more tears. He wrapped his arms around him, holding him to his chest as Marnie picked up the mugs and left, turning off the light as she went.

The room was silent apart from the crackling of the fire, the sound of Q’s shaky breathing and James’s soothing shushes. Eventually Q began to calm down and James kissed his ear. It still felt cold.

“Are you warm enough dear heart? Shall I fetch the blanket from the chair?”

Q shook his head.

“I’m OK.” There was a pause and then. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For not telling me off. I woke everyone up. I scared you…” James stroked his hand down Q’s back.

“You did scare me. Because only I’ve come to care for you so much.”

“I don’t know why. I’m supposed to be your companion but I’m hardly much company when I get like this.” Q said miserably. “I get scared so easily sometimes and I second-guess everything I do. Even tonight. I almost had a bloody panic attack looking at a fucking bed cover and then I had…” He paused and James kissed his ear again encouragingly. When Q spoke again it was so quietly James could hardly hear him. “I had the most terrible nightmare that Tiago… he found me... he said he was going to… to make love to me again, like he used to, and I just ran. I didn’t even realise where I was until I felt the snow under my feet and Marnie was calling my name.”

“It wasn’t, you know.” James said softly.

“It wasn’t what?”

“Making love. What he did to you wasn’t anything close to love. He used you. There was no love there.” Q pulled back and looked at his face, his pupils wide in the low light of the fire. “One day, when you’re ready, you might fall in love with someone and you’ll get to experience what making love is really like. You’re an exceptional felin and I’m certain you’ll be lucky like Kincade and find a Marnie of your very own. Take it from me, when you do you’ll realise that what that fuck did was about as far from making love as it’s possible to get.”

James moved his hand up and grabbed the covers, tucking them more securely around Q’s shoulders. Q looked bashful and the barest hint of a smile reached his lips.

“I think I’d rather find my very own Kincade.” He murmured.

James’s mouth hung open at Q’s little confession as the felin snuggled down. James shifted them until Q was more or less lying on his chest, his head resting on James’s shoulder. Q put his hand around James, resting it on his ribs and his eyes slid shut. After a few moments, as he started to fall asleep, a small purr began to rattle through him.

James watched him by the light of the fire for the longest time.

~00Q~

The next morning Q was subdued from the moment he woke up and barely said anything at breakfast. After they’d eaten James made him wrap up warm so they could go on a walk of the estate with Kincade. Q was in a world of his own despite both James and Kincade trying to engage him in conversation.

There was only one thing for it.

Q didn’t see the loosely-packed snowball which James lobbed at him until it hit him square on the side of the head. He stood shocked for a moment before he noticed Kincade struggling to keep a straight face and James doubled over, breathless with near-hysterical laughter. Q swore and then scooped up a handful of snow after which all hell broke loose. By the time they returned to the house they were both soaking wet, freezing cold and laughing. Marnie shook her head at them.

“Bathroom! The pair of you!” She scolded them with a smile.

James and Q both had baths to warm themselves up, each of them sitting on the closed toilet lid to chat to the other as they washed. Once they were dressed again they went down to the lounge where they sat with Marnie on the sofa to look through the rest of her photographs. They played board games after supper and by the time eleven o’clock rolled around Q was worn out again. He’d had such a lovely day, despite the drama of the previous night, and he told James as much as they got ready for bed. James didn’t offer to sleep on the chair again and instead he curled up with Q, just as he had the night before. Q purred with contentment when James kissed his ear.

“I’m going to miss you when I go away to work.” James said sadly, enjoying the feeling of having Q in his arms.

Q, who had been nodding off, shifted.

“But you’ll have today to remember won’t you?” He asked sleepily.

James squeezed him.

“I will.”

“Then it won’t seem so bad.”

James nuzzled into him, trying not to think about how lonely he was going to feel on mission without Q around. He wondered how the hell Q had come to mean so much to him in such a short time. He liked felins generally, it was true, but with Q it was different.

It was beginning to feel a lot like falling in love.

~00Q~

They were due to fly home the next day and saying goodbye to Marnie and Kincade was one of the hardest things James had done in a long while. A childish, immature part of him simply hadn’t wanted to leave. He hadn’t wanted to go back to London and be an MI6 agent again, he wanted to stay and just be his beloved felin’s adopted son. Q’s friend. The thought of having to collar him at the airport almost broke his heart.

Marnie picked up that there was something wrong. She’d always been sensitive to James’s moods, so she took him to one side while Kincade was helping Q to pack. They sat at the kitchen table and he quietly poured his heart out to her. He couldn’t really put a finger on what was wrong except how precious Q was becoming to him… and how much he worried about him.

“This man. This Tiago.” He said quietly, staring at her hands holding his. “MI6 can’t find him. There’s no trace of him. I’m scared that he’ll find Q. Punish him for escaping. I swore to protect him but what if I can’t?” He’d looked up then, searching her kindly old face for answers. “What if he finds him when I’m not there?”

Marnie had sat quietly for a moment.

“Everything will work out well.” She said decisively. “Whatever you decide to do will be for the best. I’d like to claim me and Kincade raised you to be the fine man that you are but the truth is, there’s a lot of your father in you and he was one of the finest men I’ve ever met. Have a little faith Jamie.”

“It’s not as simple as that.”

“It can be if you want it to be darling. You don’t even know for sure if Tiago will ever find Q. If you spend all your time worrying about that wee kitten, you’ll smother him and that’s no good. And you’ve done him the world of good so far. I’ve seen how he is but I’ll bet he was a lot worse when he moved in with you, wasn’t he?”

James nodded.

“He was traumatised. Broken. What they did to him…” He shook his head. “He barely spoke. He was so scared…”

“And now he’s a lovely lad. He still has his nightmares but they’ll fade with time.”

“The other night… thank you for helping him.”

She smiled.

“I know you have him seeing that therapist in London but I’ve told him; if he ever needs anything, to speak to someone, I’m only a phone call away. No matter what time of day or night. If he needs me, I’m here.”

“Thank you.”

Just then Q came in with Kincade. He was dragging his suitcase. James looked at Marnie and smiled. He knew that the case now contained the huge supply of her cooking that she’d given them; all manner of cakes and biscuits, all carefully wrapped in greaseproof paper and butcher's string. James stood up and pulled her up into a hug. He leaned over the little felin and buried his face in the side of her neck. Tears pricked his eyes.

“I’m going to miss you so much.” He whispered hoarsely. She held him tight and a moment later he felt Kincade’s arms slip around him too.

“We’ll miss you too laddie but calm down for Pete’s sake. You’ll set the missus off and then they’ll be no living with her for the rest of the day.”

James knew he was joking and huffed out a laugh as he drew back, kissing first Marnie’s cheek and then Kincade’s.

“See you at Christmas?”

Marnie shook his arm playfully.

“I’ll have you up here again before that young man! And bring that kit of yours too.”

“I’ll try to get the time off work. I promise.”

They released him and then he watched as they surrounded Q, nuzzling him as they wished him a safe journey. The young felin looked as sad as James felt as he bade them goodbye. Too soon James told them they had to go or they would miss their flight window at the airport.

~00Q~

Later, as James sat in the taxi home from Heathrow airport with Q tucked into his side dozing, he thought about what Marnie had said. Was she right? Would everything work out well for them? Was it really that simple? He’d never even considered the possibility that Tiago might never find them… He kissed Q’s tousled hair.

Only time would tell.

 

 

 


	9. ii.i

James paid off the taxi driver and started the five minute walk back to his flat.  He was so damn tired that he’d almost thrown safety protocols out of the window and asked the cabbie to drop him at his front door.  It was only the fact that Q would be at home trusting him to keep him safe that stopped him.  It had been seven months since Q was given to him and four months since James had resumed field work.  The poor abused mite he’d first encountered had gradually been replaced by the felin James had only been able to catch glimpses of during their first weeks together.  Living with James had soothed him and allowed him to recover from the trauma he experienced at the hands of his kidnapper, Tiago Rodrigues.   That wasn’t to say that he’d miraculously completely healed though.  There were still nights when James was at home that he would hear him whimpering in his sleep and days when all he would want to do was cuddle and be close.

James grudgingly had to admit that M had been right and that having Q in his life had helped him almost as much as it had helped Q.  Having Q to care for had helped James to stay sober and take better care of himself during his down time.  He was a much less selfish person than he had been.  Even on mission he’d noticed that he was having far less casual sex, taking fewer risks…  Q had been good for him and James loved him very much for it.

When James first went back into the field he’d worried about leaving Q on his own at the flat for days on end but surprisingly Tanner had provided the solution.  Beaumont had been so impressed by Q’s intellect that he had requested that Q be allowed to spend time with him working on non-sensitive projects.  As Tanner lived relatively nearby, he had offered to take Q into MI6 on the days Beaumont wanted him.  At first Q would go one day a week but that had quickly increased to three. It wasn’t policy to allow owned slaves full security clearance when unaccompanied by their owners but they could be chaperoned.  Tanner taking Q under his wing had enabled the felin to use his skills, even when James was away, and had also begun an unlikely friendship.  It wasn’t unheard of for James to return home to find the two of them sharing a meal or watching television together.  So much for fighting like cats and dogs.

Tanner wouldn’t be there now though, James guessed.  It was almost three in the morning and as far as he knew, Tanner and Q weren’t lovers.  It would almost make things easier for him if they were.  The suspicion that he was falling in love with Q, which he first had during their short break at Skyfall, had become a realisation.  He found Q extremely attractive.  The felin had filled out beautifully once he was able to eat properly and take care of himself and was now back to a healthy weight.  His skin, which had been mottled with evidence of his abuse, had smoothed out until he looked as if he had been carved from alabaster.  His hair, which had hung limply, had been cut shorter and now curled around his face.  In short, he was simply gorgeous.  He was also extremely tactile, never hesitating to touch James to show his affection.  He hated to deny Q any contact but sometimes he wished he would take a lover.  Maybe then he wouldn’t feel the need to be quite so close and test James’s resolve quite so often.  He had encouraged Q to make friends and told him it would be alright for him to have a relationship with someone special but Q would just look at him like he was insane.  He told James he had everything he needed.

He reached his front door and clumsily fumbled with his keys for a moment before selecting the right one.  He paused before inserting it into the lock.  He ached all over, the side effect of being caught in the shockwave of an exploding car bomb.  He’d been checked over in Medical and there was nothing broken but his back was blossoming into one large bruise from hitting the ground after being knocked off his feet.  He went into the lobby and started the long process of hauling himself up the two flights of stairs to his flat.  He would have used the lift but the mechanism was noisy.  It might not have disturbed the neighbours but Q’s hearing was acute and it would have woken him in a second.  He managed to get into his flat with less hassle than the front door and he quickly silenced and re-set the alarm.  Dumping his bag in the middle of the hallway he went straight to the kitchen.  Collecting a bottle of vodka and a glass he sat down at the table and poured himself a large one.   He’d barely started on it when he heard Q’s bedroom door open.  A moment later he padded into the room.  He was dressed in just a pair of pyjama trousers.  He was bare-chested and his hair was a riot.  He blinked in the light of the kitchen and smiled when he saw James.

“You’re home.  Tanner said you were due back.”

“Did I wake you?”

Q shook his head.

“Not really.  I was dozing, waiting for you.”  He said, putting the kettle on.

“You should go back to bed.” James said, downing the rest of his glass and grimacing at the taste.  He really should ask Q to start buying a better quality of vodka.  Maybe a bottle of that Finnish stuff he liked.  He poured another glass as Q sat down next to him.  “Tomorrow’s one of your days for MI6 isn’t it?”

“I cancelled it.” Q told him.

They sat in silence for a few minutes while James drank.  He wondered if he should say something but Q seemed content to just be near him.  The kettle boiled and Q got up.  James heard the clink of metal on china and then Q returned to the table.  He took the bottle away and replaced it with a mug of tea.

“I don’t want tea.” James said, watching the way the liquid in the mug was still swirling from being stirred.

“Nevertheless.”  Q said simply as he sat down with his own.  He took James’s hand, the one not nursing the glass of vodka, and wrapped it around the mug.  “Warm your hands on it at least.  Do you want something to eat?”

James shook his head and then finished the vodka. Q took away the glass as he cupped the hot mug between his hands.  He had to admit, it felt good.

“I always feel so cold when I get back.” He said quietly.  “It doesn’t matter where I’ve been.  Somewhere hot.  Somewhere cold.  I finish a mission and I feel like I’m freezing.”  Q put his hand on James’s wrist.

“I know.”

James sipped the tea.  It was strong with a hint of sugar.  He didn’t often drink tea by choice – he preferred coffee – but when he did, he liked it exactly like that way.  He stared at the table top and the next thing he knew Q was taking the empty mug away.

“Come on.”

Q took his hand and led him to the bathroom.  James watched as he turned on the shower and then pulled out a couple of fresh towels from the pile in the cupboard under the sink.  He rested his hands on Q’s hips as he stood close enough to loosen his tie.

“Q…” He started tiredly.

“Hush.” Q responded, kissing the side of his mouth.  “It’s okay.”

James stood still as Q stripped him of his clothing and then pushed his own trousers down over his hips.  James gazed at him.  His pale chest was defined now and muscular.  His lean stomach led down to the shock of soft, thick pubic fur which surrounded his cock.  James reached out and rested his hands on his hips once more.

“You’re so beautiful.”

Q smiled and kissed him on the cheek again.

“Come and have a shower.”

Instead he drew Q in, pressing their bodies together.

“I want to make love to you.”

Q’s hands slid up around his back and then gently gripped his sides to push him away.

“No you don’t.  You might think you want to but you're too tired to be thinking straight.  You’d hate yourself in the morning and I’m a little bit afraid you’d hate me too.”

“I could never…”

“James, you _own_ me.  Remember?  You told me.  I have no consent to give.”  He reached up to stroke James’s jawline. “No matter how much I might want you to.” He added sadly.

James drew Q in again and rested his head on his shoulder.

“I remember.  I love you though.”

“I know.”

“I’m going to free you as soon as I’m able.  You know that don’t you?”

Q ran his fingers up into the back of James’s hair and scratched his scalp soothingly.

“I know.”  He sounded doubtful.  James pulled back to look him in the eyes and frowned.

“Don’t you believe me?”

“It’s not that.” Q said softly.  “But I’ve had that promise made to me before.  If it happens it will be wonderful but I can’t live my life hoping for it.  I’d rather be content with what I have.”  James must have looked dubious.  “I have so much James.  You’ve given me so much.  I don’t need to hope for more.  Come on.  Let’s get you sorted out.”

James let Q lead him into the shower and watched as he lathered up a washcloth.  He started to rub at James’s chest.  It felt divine and James staggered in sudden fatigue as he relaxed.  Q put a hand under his elbow and supported him as he worked.  James closed his eyes and zoned out a little, coming back to himself as he felt the first tentative brush of the cloth below his waist.  He caught Q’s wrist.

“Don’t.” He pleaded.  He wasn’t sure he could control himself if Q touched him there.

“Sorry.” Q murmured.  He handed James the cloth.  “Turn around for me?”

James obeyed and quickly finished washing around his crotch before dropping the cloth.  He then rested his hands on the cool wall of the shower as Q grabbed another cloth to smooth shower gel over his back.  He thought back to when Q first moved in.  He’d hated the shower back then, a legacy of the torture techniques that Tiago had used on him.  Now he was happy to stand under the cascading water if it meant taking care of James.  He heard Q make a small sound of distress when he saw James’s back.

“What happened?”

“There was a car bomb.  The man… he was little more than a boy really… he was a hacker.  He broke into MI6’s servers quite brilliantly.  Operations tracked him down and I was sent to pick him up before any of the other organisations he’d interfered with got to him.  I was too late.  I followed him for ten days over six countries.  I found him in Bonn.  He saw me and ran for his car.  I tried to stop him.  I had a suspicion someone might have got to his car but he didn’t realise I was trying to help.”  He dropped his head. “The bomb vaporised him, killed six onlookers and knocked me on my arse.  I deserved it.  I was too slow.  Stupid.”  Q’s arms wrapped around him and he felt him rest his head between James’s shoulders.

“No…”

James pressed his forehead to his hands and shuddered.  The hacker had been slim with dark hair and he’d reminded him of Q very much.  It was all so fucked up.  James had told Q that he planned to free him but he wondered if he was going to be able to.  It would be well over a year before he could emancipate Q and three more after that before he was set free and yet if James had been a few feet closer to the car…  A wave of despair crashed over him and he struggled to compose himself.  He reached down and pressed Q’s hands to his chest.  He would find a way to free him.  There had to be a way.

Eventually Q pressed a kiss to his back and then pulled away to finish washing him.  James stepped back as his hands massaged cool shampoo into his hair and then pushed him back under the shower to rinse.  Once clean they got out of the shower.  Q quickly dried off and put his pyjama pants back on before leaving James alone in the bathroom to clean his teeth.  As he brushed James wiped away the condensation and looked at himself in the mirror.  He looked shot to hell.  He wondered just how much more time he had in him.  Spitting into the sink and rinsing his brush he tried to shake off his dark thoughts.  He towelled himself off and walked naked through to his bedroom.

Q was in there waiting for him.  He’d turned down his duvet and found a pair of jockey shorts and a t-shirt for him.  James gratefully let Q help him to dress, lead him to lie down on his bed and then smooth the covers over him.  He relaxed, wincing as he put pressure on his bruises.  He curled over onto his side and when Q sat on the side of the bed he took his hand.  The felin looked worried so he kissed the pads of his fingers tenderly.

“Don’t worry about me.  I’ll be okay.  I just need some sleep.”

Q stroked his temple.

“I’ll always worry about you.”

“No you won’t.”  James smiled sadly. “When you’re free and you find someone your own age to fall in love with… you’ll forget all about me.”

Q lifted their hands and kissed the inside of James’s wrist.

“Oh James.  I’ve already fallen in love.  You know that.”

James huffed out a laugh and let his eyes slide shut, exhaustion finally claiming him.  Q’s words were very sweet but James knew that he only thought that way because had had been kind to him.  Once he was free he would realise what true love was…

 

~00Q~

 

James slept late the next morning and when he finally emerged from his bedroom it was to follow the delicious smell coming from the kitchen.  He found Q standing at the cooker frying bacon.  His bag, which he’d dumped the night, before was on the floor in the corner and the washing machine was running.  Q looked up and smiled when he walked in.

“Good morning,” he glanced up at the clock above the fridge, “just.  Coffee?”

James grunted his agreement and sat down at the table.  A copy of The Guardian was there and it looked as though Q had already read it cover to cover.  He started to read the front page article about members of the European Union bickering over oil duties and was interrupted by Q setting a mug of coffee down beside him.  It was followed a couple of minutes later by a plate of food and some cutlery.

“You not eating?” James asked as he saw Q sit down with just a cup of tea.

“I had mine about two hours ago.  The fried bacon trick didn’t wake you up that time.”  He grinned.

“Cheeky kit.” James remarked. “If you wanted me to get up you could have just shouted for me.” Q shrugged and watched as James started to eat.

“If you don’t wake up I just assume you need more sleep.”

James hummed his agreement around a mouthful of bacon and mushrooms.

“I have to go into Vauxhall this afternoon to write up my mission report.  Would you like to come with me?”

Q nodded.

“Yes please.  I told Beaumont I wouldn’t be in for the full day but we thought you might be going in for a bit.  He said I could pop in if I’d like.”

“We can go for a walk afterwards if you want.  I don’t suppose you’ve been outside much these last two weeks, have you?”

“Tanner took me out at lunchtime a couple of days but only for a little while.  He’s too busy for long lunch breaks so we were only out long enough to pick up sandwiches really.”

“We can have a stroll down the South Bank if the weather stays fine.”  James offered.  Q smiled.

“That would be lovely.”

As it wasn’t strictly an official work day, they both dressed in casual clothing.  It was a warm day so James wore a simple navy blue polo shirt and inky indigo chinos and Q wore a black t-shirt and his Levi jeans.  He stood patiently in the hallway as James attached his collar.  It looked starkly black against the pale length of his exposed throat.  Once buckled, James ran his finger over the soft leather.

“I hate seeing this on you.” He said, tenderly stroking the exposed first inch of Q’s jutting collarbone.

“I know.” Q said simply.  James stared at the lettering on the small metal disc.

_‘Property of James Bond’_

Q had always loved it.  The stamp of possession.  He said it made him feel safe but it scared James in a way. His thoughts from the previous evening came back.  What if something _had_ happened to him out in the field?  What would happen to Q?  James needed to make provision and he needed to do it soon.  The next mission he might not be as lucky as he had been in Bonn.  Shaking off his maudlin thoughts he saw that Q was watching him, a soft quizzical expression on his face.  James smiled at him and it felt plastic.  False.

“Come on then.  Let’s go to work.”

 

~00Q~

 

They arrived at MI6 just after two o’clock.  James took Q straight to see Beaumont.  They had to wait for a couple of minutes while he checked in Trevelyan’s equipment.  James noticed Q stepped a little closer into him when he recognised the other agent.

“Everything alright?” James asked quietly out of the side of his mouth.  Q nodded slightly, never taking his eyes off Alec.

“I’m fine.  I just don’t like him very much.”

James slung his arm around Q and kissed his temple.

“Me neither.”  He whispered back.

Q snorted out a quiet laugh but stopped when Alec abruptly finished with Beaumont and turned to see them standing there.

“Well if it isn’t Dick Whittington and his cat!” He exclaimed with a grin.  James felt Q shrink back.  He couldn’t understand why Q should still be so nervous of Alec after all this time.  “Or is it Shrek and Puss-in-Boots?  You here to write up your report?  A little birdy told me you made rather a mess of Bonn.”

James grit his teeth and he felt the arm that Q had slipped around his waist squeeze comfortingly.

“That wasn’t actually me for a change.” He replied with an air of nonchalance he really wasn’t feeling.  “It sounds like you need a better calibre of little birdies.”

Alec shrugged.

“Whoever pulled the pin, it seems like trouble follows you around these days.”  He turned to Q.  “I’d watch out if I were you.  Events tend to turn out badly for the people – and _things_ – he fucks.”

Q stared at him defiantly.

“James does not abuse me like that.” He said proudly.

“Keep telling yourself that.  He will.” Alec said.  “You’re too much of a temptation for him to keep it in his pants indefinitely.   And it won’t end well for you.”

James made to step forward but Alec was already heading for the door.

“Got to go.  My allergies are playing up.” He sneered.

James watched him go and then turned back to Q.

“I’m sorry.  Alec…”

“Is a complete tosser?  A nasty piece of shit?” Interjected Q brightly.  “I agree.  He tries to get a rise out of me every time he sees me but I just ignore it now.  Come on.”

He walked over to Beaumont and James followed.

 

~00Q~

 

James had just finished typing up his report when there was a knock at his office door.  He half expected it to be Q but was glad to see Tanner instead.

“You wanted to see me Bond?”

“Yes please.  Come on in and shut the door.”

Tanner did as he was invited and sat down.  The offices assigned to the double 0 agents were small but had just enough space for an extra chair.

“What’s this about?”

“Q.”

“I might have guessed.” The canin replied.  “Do I take it that Q doesn’t know I’m here?”

“He doesn’t.”

“I see.” He paused for a moment.  “I want you to know that even though he’s your property I consider Q to be a very good friend and I don’t want to…”

“I want to give him to you.”

Tanner’s mouth shut with an audible snap.  He took a second to process what James had just said.

“You want to…”

“I want to give him to you.  On paper I mean.  I’d rather like to still keep him living with me if that’s okay but I can’t own him anymore.”

Tanner frowned.

“He loves you very much.  This will break his heart.  I thought you liked him.  Why don’t you want him anymore?”

“It’s not that,” James admitted.  “I adore him.”

“Then why?  Is it because you want to sleep with him or something?  Q told me you won’t do it while you own him and I don’t mind telling you that if you just want to get your leg over that’s a pretty poor reason not to...”

“No it’s not that.” James insisted.  “I wouldn’t start a relationship with him enslaved like that regardless of who he belonged to.  No it’s purely because I want him to be free.  I almost died in Bonn and it brought home the fact that there’s no guarantee that I’ll survive any mission I go on.  I thought about asking you if I could leave him to you in my will but what if that’s in three years’ time?  He’d be back to square one.  Having to wait for at least two years before you’d be legally able to consider emancipating him.  If I give him to you now…”

“You’d be assured that he’d be free in five years.  And of all the people you know, you can be sure that I wouldn’t want to keep him enslaved.”

“I considered asking M but he likes you.  He likes spending time with you.  I know you’d take care of him for me.”

“Whatever your reasoning is you really are going to break his heart you know.”  Tanner said.

“I know.”  James replied sadly.  “But I can't see another option.”

Tanner was quiet for a moment and James waited anxiously for him to speak.  Eventually he sighed.

“Alright.  I’ll do it but please, _please_ break it to him gently.  And let me know if you need me to come around later to talk to him about it.”

James felt a rush of emotion that felt like eighty percent relief and twenty percent sorrow.

“Thank you.  Thank you so much.  I’ll tell him tonight and I’ll have my lawyer draw up the papers for you by the end of the week.”

Tanner looked at his watch.

“Are you two heading off soon?  I’ll come to meet him with you if I may.  I have some DVDs I promised to lend to him.”

“Of course.  Let me just see if Beaumont’s finished with him.”  James picked up the phone and dialled Beaumont’s extension.  It was answered on the second ring.

_“Quartermaster’s office, Smith speaking.”_

“Smith, this is Bond.  Can I speak to Beaumont please?”

_“He’s not here Sir.  He went up for a meeting in M’s office about five minutes ago.”_

“Did he take Q with him?”

_“No Sir.  Trevelyan was here.  He offered to bring him up to you.  They left maybe five minutes before Beaumont.  I would have thought they’d have been with you by now…”_

James hung up the phone with a sense of foreboding.  Tanner looked on worriedly as James stood up.

“Can you get into the CCTV system from here?” He asked, indicating his computer terminal.  Tanner nodded and quickly sat down in front of it.

“What am I looking for?”    

“Go into the camera archives.  Find me Q.  Trevelyan took him from Beaumont’s department without my permission.  I want to know where they've gone.”  

 

 

 

 


	10. ii.ii

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (Please note the change in tags!)

James dialled Tanner’s mobile phone.

“Answer that.” He said as it rang. “Stay on the line.  I want to know where Trevelyan and Q went.  I’m heading for Beaumont’s office.”

He ran from the room with his own phone clamped to his ear.

 _“OK.”_ He heard Tanner say. _“When did Trevelyan take him?”_

“About ten minutes ago.”

He ran down the hall to the stairwell.  He went down the stairs to the level he’d left Q on.  Bond heard Tanner rapidly tapping on the keyboard.

_“Okay.  Let me see.  I’m accessing the camera feed for the corridor on that level… just a second… just a second… I’ve got them.  Okay… I need to switch over to the next camera… south stairwell Bond.”_

James sprinted out of the stairwell he was in and down the corridor.

“Up or down Tanner?”

_“One minute… just pulling it up… down!  Go down!  It looks like he was dragging Q by his arm by then.  I don’t like this.  I’m contacting security…”_

James hurtled down the stairs, dread rising in his stomach.  He should have known.  He was stupid.  Alec had acted inappropriately towards Q since day one.  He should have told Beaumont.  He should have warned him not to let Alec anywhere near him.

He should have warned Q to stay away from him.

“How many flights Tanner?  What floor are they on?”

_“Hang on a minute, there’s not many cameras in that area…”_

“Q might not have a minute!” James snapped.  A small part of him clung to the hope that Alec might have taken Q just to talk to him; apologise to him.  A much, much larger part of him was terrified.  It remembered the girl Alec had been accused of raping…

 _“Level minus three!”_ Tanner suddenly barked. _“Get your arse down to level minus three.  Footage shows Q trying to get away from him there.  Fuck!  Trevelyan hit him!”_

Subterranean level three housed the firing ranges and test arenas.  Unless there were specific trials being carried out the majority of the level could be deserted for days at a time.

And Alec would know that.

James burst through the double doors to the level and scanned the corridor.  On the phone Tanner was still talking and he started to sound frantic.

_“Okay.  I’m accessing the logs for the cameras on that level.  They… oh come on you piece of shit LOAD!”_

“ComeoncomeoncomeON!”  James shouted.  He paused as he thought he heard something. “Q? _Q!!_ ”  His voice echoed down the empty corridor and was initially met with silence and then…

There was a shriek from the other end of the corridor and James sprinted down it.  All the doors off it stood ajar as was the policy when the ranges weren’t in use, except the two at the end.  The bathrooms.  As he reached them Tanner shouted again.

_“The Ladies James!”_

James skidded to halt and threw his phone aside.  He turned the handle and slammed his shoulder into it, shoving it open.  He ran inside and let out a roar of fury when he saw them.  Q was on his knees struggling, his jeans and pants had been pulled down to expose his backside.  Alec was behind him, one hand grasping his tail, the other twisted into his hair.  Q’s head was yanked back, his spine arched as Trevelyan tried to mount him.  At the yell Alec looked up and James’s well-aimed punch caught him on the side of his jaw.  He slumped and James grabbed him, tearing him away from Q who fell to the floor.

“No!” James spat, “You don’t!   _You don’t!_  You don’t touch him!  You don’t fucking touch him!”  Every sentence was punctuated by another punch.  Alec hardly responded, the first blow having rendered him semi-conscious but James didn’t care.  He’d hurt Q and he didn’t get to do that, he DIDN’T.  James kept punching until two pairs of hands grabbed at him and pulled him back.  Whirling around, ready to keep fighting, he recognised them as security guards.

“Alright Sir.  We’ve got him Sir, we’ve got him.”

“He…” James tried to find the words but couldn’t find any to adequately describe the horror of what he’d just seen.  Tanner appeared at his elbow looking red-faced and out of breath just as James lunged to attack Alec again, only to be held back by the men.

“Bond!” He panted, holding him his discarded phone out to him. “James.  Stop it.  You got him.  You stopped him.  Go and look after your boy.”

At the mention of Q James stopped struggling and looked over at him.  The felin was standing and was shakily doing up his jeans.  There was blood on his face and James could see his cheek had been cut.  In two steps he was next to him.

“Kitten…”  Q reached for him and James wrapped his arms around him.  He was trembling.  “What did he do?  Are you okay?  Did he… are you…?”

“I’m fine.  I’m fine really.” Q rested his head on James’s chest.  “Just give me a minute.  I just need a minute…”  His legs suddenly gave out from under him and James carefully lowered him to the ground.  “I’m okay…” Q slurred, weakly clinging onto him.  James noticed Q’s glasses on the floor next to them.  He picked them up and wiped them on the hem of his shirt before carefully putting them back on Q’s face.

At that moment Conroy came in with two of the nurses from Medical.  She quickly went to Alec who was still mostly unconscious.  After a cursory examination she stood up.

“Get him into the secure unit in Medical and ask Kressler to see to him.  I’m likely to castrate him if I have to be in the same room as him again today.”  Peeling off the examination gloves she’d been wearing she slipped on a fresh pair as she came over to Q and James and knelt down.  “Now how’s this young chap?”  Q shivered as she gently felt around his neck and back, down to his tail which was twitching in agitation.  She lowered her voice.  “I know this difficult but you need to tell us; how far did he get darling?  Did he…?”   She rested a hand just above his tail.  Q shook his head.

“No… he… no I’m fine.”

“Our definitions of ‘fine’ must differ wildly.”  She said flatly.  She glared at him before tucking his glasses up onto the top of his head.  Taking out a penlight she quickly checked his pupillary reflex.  Satisfied with what she saw she let him put his glasses back on.  “I’d like you to come up to Medical for a quick check over.”

“No.” Q suddenly looked uncomfortable.  “Please don’t make a fuss.”

“I have to.” Conroy said, stroking her hand down his back comfortingly.  “You’ve just been attacked so I have a duty of care towards you.  I wouldn’t be doing my job correctly if I just let you leave.  What if I did that without checking you over and you were taken ill later?  I’d never forgive myself.  Besides, I need to take care of James too.  His knuckles are cut and will need cleaning.”  Q perked up at that.

“James?  Oh James, your poor hands.”

In actual fact James didn’t suppose for one moment that he needed medical attention at all but as he helped Q back to his feet he mouthed ‘thank you’ at Conroy.  It was exactly the right thing to say to get Q to go willingly into Medical.

The three of them started walking slowly to the lift with Q leaning heavily on James but by the time they got to Medical he was managing on his own.  They went into an examination room and Conroy saw to Q first.  She quickly cleaned to blood off his face and applied two butterfly stitches high on his cheekbone.  The small cut had already stopped bleeding.  James saw that there was a bruise blossoming around it and another on the side of his jaw.

“That’s not ideal.  That little cut is in a difficult spot and it might scar.  ” She said, gently pressing the little sticky strips into place. “But these should help to stop it from splitting open again.”

“Thank you Susan.  Can you look at James now please?”

Conroy smiled at Q’s insistence

“Right you are.  Come on Bond, get yourself over here.”  He held his hands out to her when she indicated she wanted to look at them. “Look at the state of them.  I can’t even see how much of this blood is yours.  Into the bathroom with you.”  She beckoned James over.  Closing the door she led him over to the sink. She turn on the cold water tap and he started to wash his hands.  She spoke quietly under the sound of the running water.  “I’m worried about him.”  James looked up from what he was doing.

“Me too.  He’s far too calm.  He says he’s fine but he’s about as far from fine as it’s possible to be.  I think I stopped Alec in time but…”  He hung his head, momentarily resting his hands on the edge of the sink. “Damnit.  After all this time, he was doing so well.  What is this going to do to him Susan?”

“I think he’ll be okay but you need to be careful with him.  He’s no stranger to coping with trauma but this is likely to set him back.  Call me if you need anything.   _Anything.”_

“I will.  Thank you.”

Handing James a towel they went back out into the room where Q was waiting.  He looked up expectantly.

“Are you alright James?  Are you badly hurt?”

“Not at all,” he replied, going over to him to show him his knuckles, “A couple of scrapes and a bit of bruising.  I’m fine.”

Q took his hands and turned them over in his own.

“I need to go and get you something,” Conroy interjected, “stay here for a minute, would you?”

As the door shut behind her.

“You beat him very badly.” Q said quietly.

“I did.”  James admitted, watching as Q brushed his fingers over the contusions on James’s knuckles.  “And I’d do it again in heartbeat.”  Q looked up at him, his eyes wide and searching. “He was hurting you.”  He said it simply, hoping that it would explain everything.  Q went back to stroking James’s hands.

“I’ve never seen you like that before.  Is that what it’s like when you’re 007?”

“Yes.  Sometimes.”

“I’m glad you’re not him all the time.  I’m not sure I liked him much.  Will you get into trouble for it?”

“Not as much as Alec will, I’ll warrant.”

Q’s expression was dark.

“Good.”

Just then Conroy returned.  She was carrying two mugs and a folded up white t-shirt.

“Here we are, tea for Q and a cup of coffee for James.  I’ve brought you a t-shirt that you can borrow Q.  The collar on that one you’re wearing is torn.”  Q thanked her and slipped off his t-shirt.  He immediately put on the one he’d been given but not before James spotted a nasty looking bruise on his lower back.  Alec must have punched him in the kidney to subdue him.  He felt another flare of anger.  “Right.  I want those drunk before you leave here but take as long as you like; you won’t be disturbed.  If you need me I’ll be just down the hall.”

They both thanked her and she left.  Q sipped on his tea and made a little face.

“Not as good as mine?” James asked with a smile, trying to remain calm for Q’s sake.

“Not even close.”

“Try and drink it anyway and then I’ll take you home.”

Q looked upset at James’s words.

“But I wanted to go for a walk.  You promised me we could.”

“If you like darling.  I just thought you might like to go home and rest.”

Q shook his head.

“No.  Please.  I want to look at the river.”

James put his arm around his shoulder.

“Okay.  If that’s what you want, we’ll go for a walk.”

 

~00Q~

 

Twenty minutes later they were strolling past Lambeth Palace, hand in hand.  Q was unusually quiet and James kept stealing glances at him.  The too-large t-shirt that Conroy had given to him was made of a thin, cheap, white material that draped down him.  The neckline was wide which accentuated the slim line of his pale throat.  His black collar was a stark contrast and the leash hung down over his thin chest before looping up and around James’s wrist.

James didn’t think he’d ever looked so beautiful.

Q turned his head to look out over the river and James caught sight of the bruising on his face from Alec’s assault.  He felt his anger rise again.  That Alec would lay hands on him and try to…  James itched to turn around, go back to MI6 and beat him again.  Q must have seen a change in James’s demeanour and he squeezed his hand.  James squeezed back and gave him a  smile.  He tried to push all thoughts of Alec out of his head.  They walked on a little longer and stopped when they found an empty bench.  They sat and admired the view.  The sun was beginning to set and the windows of the Houses of Parliament seemed to burn gold with the reflected light. After a few minutes James felt compelled to speak.

“How are you feeling?”

“Good.  I’m good.” Q replied, not bothering to look at him.

“Are you sure?” he asked dubiously.  Q sighed.  He turned to face James looking slightly irritated.

“Would you rather I wasn’t?”  He groused.

“What?  No!  I just thought…”

“It’s not like it was the first time someone tried to rape me and it probably won’t be the last!” He snapped.  He was starting to look angry now and his tail began to whip from side to side in his irritation.  “I’m owned James.  Whether you like it or not, I’m just a piece of property to some people and they will always treat me as such.  It’s always been that way and it probably always will be.  I can’t afford to let it affect me.  I’d go mad if it did.  So I say again – I am fine.  I have to be.  I can’t let it get to me as I know it’ll happen again.”

“Q. No, kitten.  It won’t always be like that.  Listen, I was going to tell you when we got home but… I have some good news.  A solution.  I’ve thought of a way of guaranteeing that you’ll be free in five years.  You know the risks of my job.  I can’t say for certain that I won’t be killed on any mission I'm assigned – I know there’s a real risk of death every time I'm in the field – but I’ve spoken to Tanner and he’s agreed that I can sign you over to him and that way…”

“You’re getting rid of me?”  Q exclaimed, the hurt evident in his voice.

“No, of course not.  Well, only in name.  You’ll still live with me when I’m home from missions but Tanner can take care of you if anything happens to me.”

“I can’t believe you’re giving me to a fucking dog!”  Q spat, tears in his eyes now.

“I want you to be free!  Tanner can free you!” James snapped back, fighting his own rising temper. He tried to make Q see sense.  “What if I die just before you’re freed?  You’d have to wait another five years!  That’s already happened to you once and I won’t run the risk of it happening to you again!  You need to be owned by someone who can stay away from danger…”

“What happens if Tanner decides to go and work for the Americans?  What happens if he decides to move to Australia?  He… he could take me away from you!”

“Please Q… He wouldn’t.  He knows I want you here.  He'd make sure you could stay here…”

“Would he?”  Q started to cry.  “Well I don’t want him to!  I want you.  I want you to be the man who stays out of danger for me.  The man who can live five years for me.  I love you James, please.”

“When you’re free you can find someone to settle down with who will…”

“Fucking hell, are you really so _stupid?”_ Q almost shouted the last word and James was vaguely aware that some of the people walking by had slowed down to take a better look at them.  “I must have told you a hundred times that I love _you!_  What?  Do you think I’m suffering from fucking Stockholm syndrome or something?  That I can’t possibly be actually in love with you?  Look at the stupid cat!  Falls in love with the first human who shows him an ounce of compassion!  Is that why you won’t fuck me?  Are you scared you’ll just encourage me?  That I’ll be too clingy if I get what I want?  Or are you too embarrassed that someone might find out you’ve been shagging your pet?”

“Q, calm down.  People are beginning to stare.”

“Why should I?  You've been quite happy to string me along until someone tried to take what you’ve been denying yourself.”

“That’s _enough!”_ James raised his voice angrily.  He realised that the day had been traumatic for Q but he had to stop.  He was just getting himself worked up now.  He reached out to stroke Q’s shoulder, to try to calm him but the felin shied away.  He jerked back and tried to stand, yelping when his leash, which was still looped around James’s wrist, snapped taut. He cried out in distress and James’s temper instantly left him.  “Kitten, please darling, you need to calm down…”

“I have never seen anything so disgusting in my whole life.  You should be _ashamed_ of yourself!”

James looked away from Q to the person who’d just shouted at them. The woman was in her forties he guessed, with dyed red hair and a green dress.  On the long handle of the handbag she wore across her body he saw a yellow badge with a black circle at the centre of it – the symbol of AFO, the Association for the Freedom of Otherkind.  They were an active lobby group in the United Kingdom who campaigned ceaselessly for the abolition of all otherkind slavery.  She was pointing at them.

“Look at this!” She proclaimed in a loud, ringing voice, attracting the attention of the people passing by.  “Look what this man has done to his slave!  And opposite the very building where the laws were passed that allow this abomination!  That poor felin has been beaten bloody by his own master who then has the gall to walk out in public, not caring that his knuckles proudly proclaim evidence of the assault!  You disgust me, you animal!  Treating him like that when…”

James was still stunned, standing open-mouthed with shock, when Q suddenly leapt in between her and James, trembling with rage.

“Shut up!  Shut up! SHUT UP!”  He screamed at her, the leash pulling taut again as he tried to step forward to push her away. “FUCK OFF!  He is my owner and he loves me and he was defending me you stupid ape!  Someone attacked me and my master defended me and he beat him and beat him and beat him because he loves me so much!  You don’t know what it’s been like!  You don’t know everything he’s done for me…”  He paused to take a breath and slumped before suddenly shying away from the woman who was now standing staring at them open-mouthed.  James was beside him in an instant.  He tried to flinch away from him too. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.  That was bad.  I shouldn’t have shouted… that was bad of me.  I’m sorry.  I’m just so tired of being hurt and scared by people…”  James gently tugged on the leash until Q came to him.  He cupped the back of his head and kissed the unhurt side of his face tenderly.

“I know kitten.  I know.”  He hugged him to his chest and rested his head on top of Q’s.  “I’m sorry too.  I made a mistake.  I should have insisted that we go home earlier and I shouldn’t have told you I was giving you to Tanner.  That was arrogant of me to spring it on you with no warning.  I thought you might see it was for the best.  I just want you to be free so badly.  I'm such a fool.  Come on darling.  Try to calm down for me.”  He ran his fingers up to the back of his ears and scratched them comfortingly.

“Is he alright?”  The woman’s voice was quieter, unsure now.  James angled Q away from her slightly, using his body to shield him.

“Why don’t you go to hell?”  He asked her tiredly.  He turned back to Q who was still sobbing quietly.  He held him close and stroked his hair to try to soothe him.  James could feel the beginnings of a purr in his throat but he wasn’t fooled.  This wasn’t anything close to Q being happy, more a subconscious attempt by him to recover from the upset caused by his momentary loss of control.  He brushed his lips across his temple and spoke quietly to him.  “Can you ever forgive me?”  Q looked up at him.

“I love you James.  Please believe me.”

James kissed him again and for once he indulged himself by fully claiming Q’s mouth.  When they broke apart he wiped the tears from Q’s cheeks with his thumbs.

“I know.  I realise that now.  I love you too.  More than I ever thought possible.  Darling kitten.  Please let me take you home.”

 

~00Q~

 

James sat on the edge of Q’s bed and surveyed the contents of his little room.  It would take so few boxes to pack up all of the belongings he’d acquired over the months he’d lived there.  Q was in the bathroom and James was waiting for him.  They’d barely exchanged a word since James had flagged down a taxi to bring them home.

Home.

The flat felt more like a home to James with Q there than it ever had when he’d lived alone.  And yet there he sat, despite everything, still wondering if he should send him away.  The day had been terrible and it had opened James’s eyes to how fragile and vulnerable Q really was and of how delusional James had been.  All those months.  Every time Q had told him he loved him he’d dismissed it.  He’d assumed that Q was just grateful.  All that time James had been free and easy with his touches and caresses, indulging his own affections, not thinking for one moment that Q truly felt the same way.  He had no clue how heartbroken Q must have been feeling.  How sad that James refused to take their relationship further.

It was too much for James to think of.  His casual cruelty.  Maybe he should speak to Tanner again.  Maybe he should ask him to let Q move in with him.  Perhaps with a little distance between the two of them Q would find it less painful.  Then, in five years’ time when Q was free… if James was still alive that was… and if Q still wanted a stupid, old and washed-up agent as a lover…

His thoughts drifted.  He wondered what would have happened if Tiago hadn’t taken Q the way he did.  Boothroyd might still be alive and Q would have been freed as he’d planned and most likely been employed by MI6.  They might still have met.  James wondered if they would still have ended up together.  He closed his eyes and imagined wooing him.  Seducing him.  Maybe he would have taken his virginity.  He would have been so gentle with him.

He heard the bathwater start to drain as Q pulled the plug and a minute later he walked into the room.  He seemed surprised to see James sitting there on his bed.  He was still damp and had a towel wrapped around his hips.

“James?”  He wasn’t wearing his glasses and squinted at him a little before walking towards him.  “Are you alright?”

James wasn’t sure that he was.  Too many thoughts were racing around his head.  Despite just thinking about the added distance he should probably put between himself and Q, he immediately put his hand out to him.  Q walked over to him without hesitation.  When he was close enough James took his hand and drew him in until he was standing between James’s spread thighs.  James wrapped his arms around him and pressed his face to his naked belly.

“Am I a cruel man Q?”

Q fingers wound into James’s hair and cradled his head.

“James?”

He shuddered and lightly kissed the flesh under his lips.  He felt Q shiver.

“Am I cruel?  I didn’t know.  I didn’t know that you loved me.  You told me so many times and I didn’t take it seriously.  Am I cruel or just stupid?”

“You’ve been kind to me James.  So good to me.  Not cruel.  Never cruel.”

“I’ve denied you…”  He said softly.  He nuzzled at Q’s belly again and breathed in the clean scent of his skin.  He noticed a red mark on Q’s hip, partially hidden by the towel, so he tugged on the material.  It slipped an inch and Q let out a small gasp.  “What’s this?”  He asked, smoothing his thumb over the graze.

“Trevelyan.” Q replied.  “He… he couldn’t get the button fly of my jeans to open.  He managed the top button and then just dragged them off me.”

James felt a swell of sorrow for his felin.  All the years of pain and abuse.  James thought he’d saved Q from that but he hadn’t.  He hadn’t at all.  He kissed the small injury before pushing the towel off Q’s other hip.  There was a similar graze there.  He leaned over and kissed that one too.  Q made a small sound which morphed into a tremulous purr of pleasure.  James lightly licked the contusion before pushing the towel away.  He looked up as it fell to the floor.  Q was wide eyed and the expression on his face was one of pure adoration. James kept eye contact with him as he kissed his belly again.  So many people had abused him.  Perhaps just this once he had a chance to show Q what love making could be like.  He dropped his head and pressed his lips to the soft fur below his navel…

Before he could go any further Q dropped down into his lap, straddling him.  He gently took James’s face in his hands and kissed him.  It was sweet and loving and utterly chaste, despite their position.  James closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around Q, suddenly feeling ashamed for wanting to have sex with him.  He owned him.  It simply wasn’t right for him to take Q as a lover, especially not on the day he was attacked.  He held him close until Q murmured;

“Will you lie with me?”  

James nodded and they lay down together on the small bed.  They faced each other and James wrapped his arms around him again.  Q moved his head in close and he kissed James.  James trembled as the felin’s rough tongue licked over his lips.  He opened his mouth and allowed it access.

“I don’t know…” He whispered between kisses.  “I don’t know if I can do this.  I don't know if I can keep pretending to myself that I don’t want you.  If there was only a way I could free you now I would do it in a heartbeat…”

Q kissed him again, shifting forward to press his body against James.  James continued to smooth his hand over his naked back.  He was so slim, so delicate.

“My darling.” He whispered.

Q watched as James caught up one of his hands and kissed the pads of his fingers.  The residual warmth of his bath and the soothing effect of James’s lazy caresses lulled him.  Within minutes the trauma of the day caught up with them and they both drifted off to sleep.

 

~00Q~

 

James had moved on from vodka to coffee.

He’d woken after an hour or so and then lain and held Q, watching him sleep for hours more before silently slipping out of his bed.  He’d come to the kitchen table and begun drinking soon after.  He couldn’t stop thinking about what he’d almost done.  He was so fucking confused.  He knew that giving Q away was the most logical option.  It would be better for both of them but he wondered what M would say if James just handed in his notice and ran away with Q instead.  They could go somewhere remote.  Maybe that cabin on a beach somewhere.  Somewhere away from people like Trevelyan.  Rodrigues.  Somewhere they could live happily until the time came for Q to be freed.  

Somehow the night slipped by as he sat and considered the situation he'd found himself in.

He was on his second cup of coffee when his phone chirruped.  He had an email.  He looked at it in surprise.  It was from Tanner.  He wondered why the canin would be contacting him at six in the morning.  The email contained a link to a video but no message text, just the subject line ‘WATCH THIS’.

He watched it.

When Q came out of his room an hour later, dressed in just his jeans, James was showered and dressed in a dark blue suit ready to leave.  He blinked at him, still dozy.

“You’re going to do it aren’t you?”  Q said quietly, his voice betraying the hurt he was feeling.

“Q…”

“You’re still going to give me away.  After everything.  Last night… that was a mistake for you, wasn’t it?” Q’s voice grew louder, more agitated.

“Q please.  Listen to me.  We’re in terrible trouble.”  James’s voice was soft but it stopped Q dead.

“Trouble?”  Suddenly all his anger was gone and James caught a glimpse of the frightened kitten that he’d first met all those months before.  He picked up his phone from where it sat on the table in front of him.

“Come and see.”

 

 

 

 

 


	11. ii.iii

“The video was spotted just before eleven o’clock last night.” Tanner said as he led them towards M’s office.  “Tech Services have facial recognition programs in constant operation scanning the internet.  We hunt for images of all of our agents.  By the time the program flagged up a possible match and we confirmed that the person in the video was you Bond it had gone viral and had been viewed over four hundred thousand times.  We’ve eradicated it as far as is possible but it’s likely we’ll be coming across postings of it on other websites for days yet.”

“Christ.” 

The video was of the AFO woman challenging them as they fought and of James’s tender attempts to calm Q down.  Tanner told them that the link had appeared under various titles but the one he sent James had the lurid clickbait headline; ‘Activist Challenges A Man Who She Thinks Is An Abusive Slave Owner.  What Happens Next Will Melt Your Heart!’.  James cursed his own stupidity at not having noticed that they were being filmed but he’d been rather preoccupied with Q at the time.  He glanced at Q who walked beside him quietly, holding his hand.  He looked pale and ill.  He could only imagine what was going through his head.  If the video had been seen over four hundred thousand times there was a chance that Tiago, or someone working for him, might have seen it.  And the video made it very clear that they had been standing opposite the Houses of Parliament…

They reached M’s office and Tanner knocked on the door before they all filed in.  She was going through a dossier, the contents of which was spread out across her desk.  Bond could see a couple of stills from the video amongst the pages of text.  She gestured them to sit down.

“We have a problem Bond.  Tanner’s briefed you, I assume?”

“Yes Ma’am.”

“It was my fault,” Q suddenly piped up. “I lost my temper and was acting out and…”

“With all due respect,” M cut across him, “There is only one person to blame here.  Bond, what in hell’s name were you thinking?  Q had just been physically attacked and yet you chose to take him out for a bloody walk?”

Q went to speak again and James squeezed his hand lightly to stop him.

“I agree Ma’am.  This is all my fault.  I should have taken better care of him.”

“Yes, you should have.  Still, there’s nothing we can do about that now.  We have to assume that Q’s previous owner has seen the video and need to react accordingly.  To my mind we have three options.  The first is that we find a new owner for Q.  Put him out of harm’s way.  We have contacts all over the globe that will most likely assist us in this.  We’d just need to pick a country.  The second option is that you retire from active service Bond and then you disappear together.”  James felt his heart constrict.  He’d been thinking about just that the night before.  Could they…? “The third option is we do nothing.”  James frowned at her.  “On the face of it, that is.  You two carry on your routines as if nothing has happened.  However, we will see to it that you are monitored twenty-four hours a day.  That way if Rodrigues tries anything…”

“ _ Bait _ .”  The word was whispered.  Q looked grim. “You want to use me as bait.”

“Yes.”  M was matter-of-fact.

“And will you capture him?”

“Yes.”

“Kill him?”

“If needs be.  At the very least we will see to it that he is prosecuted for his crimes.”

“Then the answer is yes.”

“Q…” James pressed Q’s hand between his own two. “You don’t have to.”

Q’s eyes flashed with anger when he answered him.

“Yes I do.  I do have to.  You said it yourself James.  Revenge helped you.  I want to see him punished.” 

“That was different.”

“Why?  Because you were only risking yourself?”

“Yes.  That’s exactly why.  Darling kit, we can move away.  We can be careful…”

“And let me live in fear for the rest of my life?  Is that what we can do?”  Q asked, his voice almost breaking with emotion.  “My nightmares… you know I still struggle with them.  Do you realise how many times a day I give a stranger a second glance because I think it’s Tiago?  How much courage I have to muster up to leave the flat with Tanner every morning that you’re away on a mission?  All because I know that he’s out there somewhere?  Hating me for escaping.  Looking to get me back.  I know him James.  He won’t have taken losing me well.  I want him gone.  I want him neutralised.  I want him to stop haunting me.”

“Ultimately though, this is my decision.”  James said stubbornly. “You belong to me.”

“I know.  Do you think I don’t know that?  Do I need to beg?  I will if you want me to.”  Q slid off his seat and knelt by James’s feet.  He pulled James’s hands to his chest before dropping his face and kissing the backs of them.  “Please.  If you’ve ever loved me…”

James tugged him up and leant over, meeting him halfway.  He kissed him tenderly, pulling one of his hands free so he could cup the back of Q’s head.

“I do,” He murmured, “I love you so much, you know that, but I want to keep you safe.  Out of harm’s way.”  He tried to rest his forehead on Q’s, a reassuring gesture he’d done countless times before but the felin pushed him away, framing his face with his hands.

“Then we need to eradicate the threat.  Capture Rodrigues.  Get him out of my life once and for all.”  James closed his eyes, feeling pained but Q shook his head gently.  He opened them again and saw that Q was studying him. “Don’t we?”  James nodded and Q let him hug him close before drawing back and finally pressing their foreheads together.

“Okay.  Okay.  Whatever you want.”

Q sat back into his chair and they finalised their plans.  There would be three squads assigned to them made up of MI6 and MI5 operatives who would watch them on a rolling basis.  If they did their jobs properly, Bond and Q would be totally unaware of their presence.  M made a phone call ordering a team to immediately break into James’s flat and place bugging devices and cameras throughout.  Then she arranged for them to visit Beaumont and for Q to have a tracking device implanted, similar to the one all agents, including James, had.

“We have to assume that Rodrigues will find you.” She said before they left her office.  “Tanner will see to it that Tech Services slow down their efforts to eradicate the video online.  Not so much to make it appear we are leaving it in the public domain deliberately but hopefully enough to make it seem we have inadvertently failed to keep a lid on it.  In the meantime stick to your routine, visit all the places you would normally visit and with any luck, Rodrigues will make his move.”

~00Q~

When they got to Beaumont’s department he was there waiting for them.  He’d never been overly familiar with Q despite them getting along very well.  Their relationship had always been strictly professional and yet the moment Beaumont saw him he rushed over and pulled him into a hug.  Q smiled and wrapped his arms around him as James watched.

“My poor boy.  My poor,  _ poor  _ boy.” James heard him say quietly.  “I’m so sorry.  I had no idea.  I would never have…”  He broke off and seemed to tighten his grip on Q.

“It’s alright.  Really it is.  I’m OK.”  Q patted his back as the man seemed unwilling to let go of him.  After a minute of standing quietly Beaumont released him.  He instantly turned to James and offered his hand.

“I’m sorry Bond.  I should never have let Trevelyan take him like that.”

James shook his hand.

“There’s nothing to forgive.  If I’d had any firm suspicions about him I could have said something to you.”

Beaumont nodded and James suddenly felt quite sorry for the man.  He seemed genuinely devastated at the consequences of his actions. 

They followed Beaumont as he took them to a small room to have Q’s tracker inserted.  It was a short procedure after which Beaumont asked whether Q might like to stay and have a look at a mini dart-gun prototype he’d just finished.  Q looked at James.

“May I?”

“Of course, if you like.”  James had a feeling that it would be good to let Q think about something other than Tiago for a while and he wanted to speak to Tanner privately anyway.  Also he wasn’t overly keen on the idea of taking Q home and letting him see the surveillance team setting up their equipment in the flat.  He gave Q a final kiss and as he left Beaumont swore that this time he would keep Q with him until James returned.  James thanked him.

Once out of the department James made his way to Tanner’s office in Operations.  The canin was busy typing up something but he stopped when he saw James.

“Bond.  How are things?  How’s Q doing?  I didn’t like to ask in front of him.”

“Better.  He’s with Beaumont now fiddling with a new gadget.  It’ll help him get his mind off things.  I just wanted to thank you for helping me yesterday.  Without your assistance in finding him…” He paused as he thought about what might have happened to Q. “... it would have been so much worse.”

“I’m glad I could help.  I like Q and I know it can sometimes be difficult to be owned.  No matter how much your owner loves you.”  

James hesitated at Tanners words.

“Actually, I need to ask you something about that.  Have you got a minute?”

The canin said he did so James closed the door before sitting down.

“What’s this all about?”

“Q. Kind of.  This is all a bit personal actually.  You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.” Tanner just looked at him with one eyebrow raised.  “Did you… Have you ever personally known a slave who’s had sex with their master?  I don’t mean as a service slave, I mean as a lover.”

Tanner’s expression softened.

“You slept with Q.”

“Kind of.  Well, not really no.  We kissed.”

“You two kiss each other all the time.”

“No.  I mean we  _ kissed _ .  And Q was naked.  And… anyway.  I haven’t fucked him and I’m not sure he would want to after what’s happened to him but we’re getting so close and...”  James rubbed his fingertips across his forehead.  “I just wondered if it can ever be a good thing for a slave to fall in love with their master.  I don’t want to take advantage of him.  Encourage him if…”

Tanner looked amused.

“You really are something.”

“What do you mean?”

“James, anyone with half a brain can see that you two are already stupidly in love with each other.  If he hadn't been abused by Rodrigues, you’d have had him in every conceivable position over every surface of your flat by now and not thought twice about it, enslaved or not.  You actually think you’re not sleeping with him out of a sense of moral duty just because you own him don’t you?  Let me ask you this.  Say Q was freed this afternoon.  Would you take him home and fuck him tonight?” 

James shook his head.

“I couldn’t.  Not after what he’s been through.”

“Then there’s you’re answer.”  James frowned, still not seeing Tanner’s point.  The canin leaned forward.  “You’re scared to touch him in case you hurt him because you think he’s too badly damaged from his experiences with Rodrigues.  It’s really not got anything to do with you owning him.  If he was free you’d still hesitate.  You need to try to forget about all this ‘owner/slave’ stuff when you’re with him.  He loves you.  Be brave enough to love him back in any way that he wants you too.  Stop being so scared of breaking him.  He’s a feisty little sod and more resilient than you’re giving him credit for.  And in answer to your original question; no.  I’ve never known a slave who’s been in a loving physical relationship with their master.  But I remember a young pup who once loved his mistress very much.”

For a second James wondered who Tanner meant and then the penny dropped.

“Fuck me.  You slept with M! You dirty dawg!” He joked, laughing in his suprise.

Tanner chuckled.

“Not only that, we were lovers.” He said softly. “It was after her first husband left her.  I was nineteen and I adored her.  We were together for three years.”

“Until you were freed?”

“Until a year after I was freed.  She broke it off when I went away to uni to do my master’s degree.  There were no hard feelings though.  She just thought I should find someone younger.  I was sad it ended but a few years later I started to work here with her and it felt more comfortable for us to be colleagues.  We’re better off this way.  And besides, I’ve had a few partners since.  I’m courting someone now actually.”

“Might I ask who?”

“New recruit.” Tanner replied with a smile.  “Little vulpin, goes by the name of Moneypenny. Gorgeous.  Curly hair, body to die for, beautiful bushy tail.”

James grinned.

“She sounds wonderful.  Do you know, there was a time when I hoped that you and Q might…”

“No thanks mate.  Not really my type.”

“Felin?”

“Bloke.”

James laughed again as he stood up to leave.  “Listen,  thanks for the chat Tanner.  I appreciate it.” He turned to go but stopped when Tanner spoke again.

“James.  There’s something I need to tell you.”  All the amusement had fled from Tanner’s expression.  “I’m sorry, I didn’t know whether to tell you at all.  I wasn’t sure he deserved it.”

“Who?”

“Trevelyan.  I saw him last night.  He’s in Medical.  He… well he wanted to know if he could see you and Q.  I think he wants to apologise.”

“I’ll bet he does.”  James said curtly and turned to the door.

“They’re sending him to Wales.”   James hesitated.  There was a small facility, miles from anywhere in the heart of the Brecon Beacons.  They called it a ‘retreat’ but it was essentially a high security psychiatric hospital.  Very few staff referred there ever came back to work at MI6 again.   “He knew he had no right to ask but he said you used to be friends.” Tanner said apologetically.

“I’ll think about it.” 

 

~00Q~

 

He went to the fitness suite.

He always kept a variety of clothes in his locker to train in so he stripped off and slipped into his trunks.  The pool was deserted so he started swimming lengths.  The steady strokes, as regular as a metronome, helping to clear his head.  Put his thoughts in order.  He wondered if Tanner was right.  Could he really justify not taking Q as a lover any longer?  Was he really taking the best course of action by trying to ignore the growing attraction between them?  Q had been badly hurt in the past.  Might James be hurting him even more by refusing him?  He didn’t know.  He simply didn’t know.

His thoughts moved on to Alec.  Once one of his best friends.  He’d needed help for years and now he was going to get it, but at what cost?  James wondered what could have pushed him to act so abhorrently.  And in the heart of MI6.  Why?  As his body began to tire and his lungs began to burn with fatigue, he realised there was only one way he was going to find out.

 

~00Q~

 

He arrived at Medical to see Doctor Kressler at the front desk.  The surgeon looked up from his notes and frowned when he noticed James enter.

“No prizes for guessing what you’re doing here.  You’ve heard he’s been asking to see you, I presume?”  James nodded.  “Is there going to be violence involved?  Should I call for additional security now and save both our time?”

“I’m just here to talk to him.  No trouble.  I promise.”

Kressler narrowed his eyes.

“I’ll believe that when I see it.  I want you to know this; if it had just been Trevelyan’s idea to talk to you I’d be turning you away right now but Doctor Hall’s been assessing him.  He thinks it might help if you speak to Alec before he gets shipped out of here and strictly speaking, he is Hall’s patient; despite what you’ve done to his face.  So I’m acceding to Hall’s decision on this occasion.  I don’t have to like it though and despite your fabulously reassuring words, first sign of trouble and I’m slinging you out of here.  Do I make myself clear?”

“As crystal.”

Kressler looked unimpressed but led James down the hallway to one of the secure rooms at the end.  At a word from him the guard on duty unlocked the door.  He and Kressler stood aside to let James pass.

“Ten minutes.  No more.” Said the doctor as James entered the room.

Alec was sitting up in the solitary bed in the middle of the room.  The railing sides of the bed were of a sturdier construction than standard hospital beds and James could see that both of his wrists and ankles were cuffed to it.  Alec turned his head to the doorway as James entered and James felt a dull twist of grim satisfaction as he saw how bruised his face was.  Both eyes were black, his nose was taped and an ugly purple bruise covered the whole of the left side of his jaw.

“James.”

Alec’s voice was rough, dry.  James stood at the foot of the bed, his hands behind his back, rigid in parade rest.

“You wanted to see me.” He stated.

“Where’s Q?”

“Why on earth would you imagine I would ever let you be in the same room as him again, you piece of shit?”  James’s voice was calm but a fury was beginning to build in him.  He struggled to keep a hold on himself, clenching his hands into fists in the small of his back.

“I’m sorry.”  Alec said.  “I shouldn’t have done what I did.”

“Oh, well thank fuck for that!” James snapped.  “I’ll pass your message on to him shall I?  ‘It’s alright darling kitten, you don’t need to be scared any more.  Don’t bother worrying about almost getting arse-raped in the bowels of MI- fucking-Six!  Don’t worry about some wanker filming you having a nervous breakdown in the street afterwards and then putting it on the fucking internet.  Don’t worry that your abusive old owner now has the information he needs to hunt you down and possibly recapture you.  It’s all okay now because Alec Trevelyan has fucking well apologised.’  Is that what I should tell him Alec?  Should I tell straight away I wonder or wait until he wakes up screaming from his nightmares again tonight?  Jesus wept!” James raised his fists to his temples and gritted his teeth.  He’d never wanted to punch someone quite as badly as he did right then.  He forced himself to calm down.  “You have no idea how much he’s been through.” James said quietly.  “How far he’s come.  And then here… one of the few places he feels safe and you had to do  _ that _ .”

“I’m so sorry.” Alec said again.

“Stop fucking saying that!” James spat, turning his back on him.  He if had to keep looking at Alec’s pleading eyes he wasn’t sure what he’d have done.  He took a deep breath and was shocked when he realised how shaky it sounded as he exhaled.  “Just tell me why.” He said wearily,   “Why Q?”

“I saw you with him.  That first time in Medical and he was so affectionate.  So… loving and I knew you’d only had him a few days and yet he looked at you like you were his whole world… I just… wanted… that.”

James turned back, unsure of what Alec had just said.

“You were jealous?”

“Yes.  No.  I don’t know.”  The cuffs on his wrists clanked on the bed frame as he tried to raise his hands.  “I’d just got back from a mission that had gone tits up in the worst way, almost lost the use of my fucking trigger finger and there you two were.  You had each other and it made me feel so lonely somehow.”

“So you decided to rape him?”

“No.  I never…”  He shook his head.  “When I took him I just wanted to talk to him.  To apologise.  Because I kept being a dick towards him and… when he realised we weren’t heading for your office like I told Beaumont he didn’t want to come with me, and he started fighting me and I saw red and…” He hung his head. “I lost control.  Just like with that girl in Brixton.  I lost control.”

Alec drew his knees up and rested his forehead on them as he started to cry.  Despite everything, despite how despicably Alec had behaved James felt a twinge of sympathy for him.  James had known the same nagging loneliness that Alec had described.  True, he’d never acted on it like Alec had but James had always had Kincade and Marnie to rely on, even if they were hundreds of miles away.  Alec had had no one.  Except for James, and he’d turned his back on him years before.  He walked over to the bed and picked up the beaker of water that sat on the bedside cabinet. 

“Here.”

Alec looked up and after a moment’s confusion, sipped from the straw that James offered him.  After he’d drunk his fill James put the cup back down and walked to the door.

“Go to Wales.  Do what they ask of you.  Get well.  Don’t ask me to forgive you though.  I’m not sure that I can do that yet but get well Alec.”

He looked back and Alec nodded.

James left the room.

 

 

 

 


	12. ii.iv

It was evening by the time James and Q returned to their flat.  Q had been quiet ever since James had picked him up from Beaumont and he was beginning to worry about him.  Q had seemed so resolute in following the plan earlier - so brave - calmly accepting everything that was to happen but he’d sat in complete silence in the car on the way home, staring out of the window.  James wondered if he was admiring the view or looking out for signs of Tiago’s men.  Whichever it was, he couldn’t miss the way Q huddled against him for the short walk between the car and the flat.

He stood obediently as James unbuckled his collar and then announced he was going to make a cup of tea.  James sat at the kitchen table and watched him as he went through his little routine, steeping the loose tea in its pot before pouring it out through a strainer into two mugs.  He added sugar and milk and then put James’s down in front of him.

He then took his mug and left the room.

James sat and listened as Q walked through to the lounge but made no effort to follow him.  Instead he sat and drank his tea alone.  He didn't rush, trying to give Q time to be on his own, but eventually he couldn’t stand it anymore and got up to find him.

Q was standing by the front window, looking out at the square below, his empty tea mug sitting on the window ledge beside him. James’s first instinct was to tell him to move away, to hide, despite the fact there was a voile curtain which effectively obscured him from the view of the street below.  Instead he walked up behind him and slipped his hands around his stomach.  Tugging him back into a loose hug he kissed the side of his neck tenderly.

“What are you looking at kitten?”  He asked quietly.

“The agents watching us.  I wondered if they were down there already.  I wondered if I might spot them.”  James rested his chin on Q’s shoulder.  He scanned the street below.  After a pause he said;

“The woman jogging.  Do you see her?”

“Pink top?”

“That’s her.  She’s one.”

“How can you tell?”

“Just a hunch.  She looks to be in good shape but she’s running very slowly.  She’s either slacking off today or she’s being careful not to wear herself out.”

“In case anything happens?”

“In case anything happens.  She’s scoping the area.  When she goes out of sight she’ll loop around the back of our building.  She’ll probably do that half a dozen times before she swaps with another agent.”

“Is she on her own?”

“No.  There’ll be at least three agents assigned to us at any one time.”

Q relaxed back into his arms.

“Who else?”

James pointed towards a brightly coloured Sky Television van parked a little way up the road.

“I expect that’ll be the monitoring unit for today.  Picking up the feed from the cameras they put in here.  Beaumont’s probably told you, the camera’s emit a very weak signal deliberately.  The equipment in the van will pick their signal up but it makes them very difficult to isolate and intercept.  There’ll be at least one agent in there watching us.” He felt Q shiver.  “It’ll just be cameras though.  If we were criminals and they were staking us out there would be a microphone in every room.  As it is, they’ll most likely just have put one in a central location, probably the hallway.  It’ll pick up any raised voices or loud noises but they can’t hear us speak normally unless we’re in the hall.” He smoothed his hand down Q’s arm.  “They won’t use a van all the time though.  It’s too obvious parking a tradesman’s van in a street like this overnight.  They’ll probably replace it with a smaller car which has signal boosting equipment in the boot tonight.  That way the van can park further away.”

“Do you think there’s two agents in the van today?”

“Not today.  Look at the bench over by the post box.”

“The old lady?”

James chuckled.

“No silly.  The ursin sitting next to her.”

“Ooh.  He’s huge.  Why do you think he’s an agent and he’s not just some random big guy?”

“Because his name’s Coatham and he works for MI5.”

Q huffed out a breath and snuggled back into James’s chest as rested his hands on his wrist.

“That’s cheating.  I thought you were being clever for a minute there.”

“I am clever.” James smiled and kissed his neck again.

“Not as clever as me.”

“No.  Nowhere near.”

They stood in silence for a while, still watching the hubbub of the street below.  James nuzzled into Q’s hair as he tried to see if there was any threat down there.  He didn’t want to alarm Q but he was nervous.  What if the agents down there missed something?  What if, somehow, Tiago still managed to snatch Q away?  He was deep in thought when Q spoke again.

“You’ve never really asked me what he did to me you know.”

James tightened his hold on him.

“I…” He hesitated. “I don’t want you to take this the wrong way, but I’ve never really cared.”

Q turned his head to nuzzle back.

“You haven’t?”  He sounded confused.

“You’ve told me some of it.  I’ve guessed some.  I’ve had my share…”  He paused again, trying to find the right words.  “I’ve had some fucking _awful_ things done to me while on missions and it’s never helped me to talk about it… explicitly.  I guess I just wasn’t so hungry for details of what happened to you that I wanted you to relive any of it on my account.”

Q stared out of the window and they were silent again for a spell.

“How much do you know about fear?”  Q whispered eventually.

“All there is.” James answered, almost wishing Q would stop.  Not dredge up the memories. Q dropped his head.

“Not like him.  He did terrible things to me… him and his men.  He made me feel dirty.  Unclean.  He degraded me, hurt me.  Took things away from me that I’ll never get back.  He killed my father.  Denied me my chance to be a free citizen.”  James felt a tear splash onto his arm.  “He brutalised me.  Made me do hideous things to innocent people.  He made me kill.  People died.”  He took a breath and sobbed.  His shoulders shook as he struggled to speak again.  “But I want you to know.  If he finds us – if he finds _you_ – I’d go back to him in a heartbeat if it means he leaves you alone.”

“No…”

“I have to.  I can’t… I won’t let anything happen to you James.  I love you too much.  In all the time I’ve known you, you’ve never treated me with anything but love and kindness.  Even when I didn’t it was possible for anyone to want me.”  James curled around him as Q shivered.  He turned his head then and James cupped his face as he kissed the side of his mouth lightly.  He could taste the salt of his tears.

“I can’t let you go back to him.  It won’t come to that”

Q’s eyes had briefly closed at the touch of James’s lips on his face but he opened them at James’s words.  He smiled up at him.

“You make me feel so safe when we’re together.”  James realised he must have been frowning when Q turned around fully and reached up to stroke his brow. “Kiss me again.  Please?”  James claimed his mouth once more, properly this time, tightening his hold on Q.  Q slid his hand up into James’s hair.  “I know that… I know that I have no right to ask you for more than that which you’ve already given me.  You’ve given me so much.  You’ve been so good to me… protected me… but please.  If anything happens… Whatever happens, I don’t want to have anything to regret.  Please James.  Will you take me to bed with you?”

James hesitated and almost refused.  In spite of everything he was still scared of taking his relationship with Q too far.  Of abusing him and of being no better than Tiago and his men… He shivered as he felt his resolution begin to crumble.  He thought about Alec and of the viciousness that Q had experienced at the hands of so many men.

“I swore to be a good man.” He whispered against Q’s lips. “I promised myself I would never… Darling pussycat.  I’m so tired of saying no to you.”  Q whimpered as James kissed him again, smoothing his hands around him to draw him in close.  He closed his eyes as Q pressed his body into James’s more firmly.  “Come with me sweetheart.”  James took his hand, leading him down the hallway to his bedroom.  Q went to kiss him again but James stopped him.  “Give me a minute.”

He found the hidden camera set into the wall above the wardrobe.  Using a chair James climbed up and then pointedly shook his head.  He mouthed _“not in here”_ to the agents watching and then used his fingernails to tilt the tiny lens so that it faced the top of the wardrobe rather than the bed.  Hopefully the surveillance team would understand.  Jumping down he walked back over to Q.

“I don’t want anyone else seeing you naked.” He said gently.  Q smiled and slid his hands up around James’s neck.

“Am I going to get naked now?”  He asked with a smile.

“Is that OK? I’d rather like both of us to be if I’m honest.” James admitted.

“I know you’ll be sweet to me.  You can do whatever you like.”

James kissed him again as he started to unbutton the front of Q’s shirt.

“I’d rather do whatever you like.” James said, “I want to make this good for you.”  He drew back the material and softly kissed Q’s throat.  “I want you so much.” He said honestly.  “I really do.  And I’m not sure what you want me to do but I’m just … I’m not sure I can fuck you, not today.  I want to make love to you though.  I want to… will you let me darling kitten?  Will you let me show you that not all men are unkind?”  Q nodded as James pushed the shirt off his shoulders. He reached down to the waistband of Q’s trousers.  “May I?”  Q nodded and bit his lip as he looked down, watching as James popped the button and slowly drew down the zip.  James then reached around the back of him and undid the small buckle that kept the back of his waistband closed above the aperture for his tail.  He smoothed his hands over Q’s hips and his trousers fell to the floor.

James kissed him again and cupped his ribs.  Guiding him, he made him sit on the side of the bed before kneeling between his spread thighs.  James knelt up to kiss him and Q began to purr as James dropped his head to kiss his throat, lightly biting the skin there.  He saw a small scar, a leftover from the terrible chafing his old collar had given him and he kissed it, open mouthed, soft.  Q sighed so James did it again.  He ran his tongue over Q’s clavicle before latching onto one of his small pink nipples.  Q shuddered as James pressed his hand on his lower back, making him arch and push out his chest.  He worried the small nub with his tongue before licking lower.  Encouraging Q to lie back, his legs still dangling off the edge of the bed, he kissed the inside of his knee before trailing kisses up his thigh.  When he reached the edge of his underpants, James moved back to kiss the other knee and repeated the whole thing.  By the time he was brushing his face over the soft cotton Q’s high-pitched purr of excitement had turned into a contented rumble of desire.  James hooked his fingers into his waistband and then smiled.

“Do you want me to?”

Q nodded, apparently not trusting himself to speak, and watched as James peeled his underwear off him.  James tossed the garment away and paused to rearrange his own growing erection as he admired Q’s.  Felin’s cocks were different to a human's.  Whereas men’s were generally smooth until the ridge caused by the base of the glans at the head, a felin’s was ridged all the way down the shaft.  These ridges, James knew, would become engorged at the point of orgasm.  This was an evolutionary throwback to a cat’s penis which was barbed to stimulate the female’s ovulation.  James had actually never been with a male felin before but as an agent willing to have sexual contact to gain information, James had been required to read up on the subtle differences between all otherkinds.

He reached up and ran his fingers up over Q’s balls, stroking the fur there.  It was so soft and warm.  He’d had so many fantasies about touching Q like this.  Lowering his head, James kissed them, resting his hand on Q’s cock as he indulged himself and inhaled his clean scent.  Q sighed and eased his legs apart so that James could bury his face into the crease of his thigh, licking into the warm, slightly damp fur there.  He closed his eyes, indulging in the warm, thick scent of Q as he lightly grasped his balls and eased them to the side, kissing the delicate skin as it stretched taut.  Q moaned and James placed his other hand on his thigh, feeling, listening, for any sign of tensing up or discomfort on Q’s part.  

There wasn’t any but instead of moving down, as he might have with another lover, he slid his hand under one of Q’s thighs and up around onto his abdomen, keeping him still as he cupped his other hand under Q’s cock and licked up its ridged length.  The felin jerked and sighed again, a quiet sound of pleasure, as James closed his lips over the head of it.  He sucked gently and was rewarded by a burst of sweet and salty precome.  James had never tasted anything like it so he took more of him in, pressing his tongue against it, eager for more.  He received another larger drib of the precious liquid which he worked over the head with his tongue.  James straightened up on his knees and began to work Q’s cock, gripping him tightly with his fist as he sucked and lapped at the head.  He looked up all the while, watching Q’s face for any signs that he wasn’t enjoying himself.  He was lying back, his chest heaving as he purred.  When James got another taste of precome and Q’s hips jerked he regretfully pulled off him.  Q was new to gentle lovemaking and James didn’t want it to be over for him too soon.  

Q opened his eyes and smiled up at him, blushing as if he’d just noticed what James was doing.  James stood up and started to unbutton his shirt, prompting Q to get up and help him.  As their fingers tangled Q lent forward and kissed James, his rough tongue pushing into his mouth.  James stopped what he was doing to cup the back of his head and kiss him deeply.  He slipped a hand between them and lightly grasped Q’s cock, making him shiver as his other hand smoothed down his back to circle his waist.  He felt every bump of his spine as he stroked and the realisation of Q’s fragility that he’d first felt holding him while lying on his little bed the night before was back.  James renewed the kiss, pushing back with his own tongue as he felt Q’s clever fingers trail over his chest and pause to toy with his nipples.  When they eventually broke away he said;

“What do want darling kit?  Tell me what you want.”

Q blushed again.

“Kissing me there… before… that felt wonderful.  Can I do that for you?”

“You don’t have to do that.”

“Please.  I want to.”

James smiled and quickly stripped off his shirt.  Slipping a hand around Q’s waist he pulled their naked chests in together again.

“You can do whatever you want, you know that.  I love you.  I want this to be good for you.”

“I love you too.”

The muscles in his abdomen jumped as Q started to unbuckle his belt.  He made short work of the button and zip fly of his trousers.  James watched, his mouth suddenly dry, as Q hooked his fingers into the waistband of his underpants and drew them off together.  Q’s eyes widened as he took in the sight of James’s naked arousal.  He crawled back onto the bed and pushed down the duvet as James followed.  Lying down he watched as Q knelt over him.  He looked like a kid in a sweet shop, unable to decide what to do first.  Eventually he started to smooth his fingers over James’s chest.

“You have so many scars,” he whispered, “but you are so beautiful.”

James smiled up at him.

“I’m not sure I’ve ever been called that before.” He said slowly.

“Oh, but you are.”  Q insisted.  “I remember the first time I saw you. I was terrified.  After everything that had happened to me, you walked into the cell and I heard M say that I was yours.  All I could make out was that you were a big man until you crouched down beside me.  Then I saw your beautiful blue eyes and I knew you’d be kind to me.  I just knew.  And you were.”

“I could never harm you.”

Q put his hand on James’s stomach.

“You have so many muscles.  I can feel them all.”  James shivered as Q started to trace the line of his abdominals.  He was achingly hard and his cock twitched with every feather-light touch.  Q noticed and suddenly ran a single fingertip up its length.

“Jesus!”

James panted as he tried desperately to stay still.  Q’s finger caught up a smear of liquid from the head and bringing it to his lips, licked it off.

“You taste good…”

Q leaned over and it was testament to James’s self-control that he didn’t come the second he felt his rough tongue touch him.  He reached up and gripped the ornate metal of the bed frame above his head in an effort not to buck his hips as Q lapped at him.  He gritted his teeth at the slow and thorough licking.  Q dropped his shoulders down and pushed his tail up until it wavered happily above him.  James let go with one hand and reached over to stroke his back.  Q smiled as he carried on, pushing up into James’s touch sinuously.  He gently cupped James’s balls and mouthed over the side of his shaft, occasionally licking at the prominent veins.  It was oddly sweet and utterly intoxicating.  James shuddered, willing himself not to come at Q’s light, inquisitive touch.  

When he thought he could stand it no longer he stroked Q’s face and gently guided him up until he lay next to James.  He kissed him as they came to rest side by side, facing each other.  James could taste himself of Q’s lips as he reached between their bodies and grasped both of their cocks in one hand.  Q gasped as James began to stroke.

“That felt so good but I want to make you come,” he whispered, “will you come for me, darling kitten?”

Q looked at him wide-eyed and nodded.  His hands pressed up against James’s chest and as James got into a rhythm, Q grasped at him.  His fingernails, which protracted as he got closer to orgasm, began to dig into James’s skin.  When he started to pant, James shifted his own hips, removing his cock from his grip so he could concentrate on just stroking Q’s.  He tightened his hold and moved his hand more slowly, knowing that the faster, lighter touch that he preferred probably wouldn’t get Q there.

It was less than a minute before Q cried out, a soft keen which mingled with his purrs as he started to spasm, his come splashing over their bellies.  When James felt the ridges of Q’s cock start to thicken and expand he immediately stopped stroking and gripped it as tightly as he dared.  Q threw his head back and howled, his legs jerking and his claw-like nails cutting into James’s chest as he started to ride out a series of orgasms, each one a little less intense than the one before.  Having large cat-like ears towards the top of his head meant that Q’s neck seemed to go on forever and James took great delight in latching onto the side of it at the base of his jaw.  He suckled on the skin there, feeling the vibration of Q’s purr and the sweet tremors wracking his body as he slowly relaxed.  When he finally stopped trembling, James released his grip.  He kissed Q’s throat a couple more times, licking over the little red marks he’d left and then pulled back.  

Q was fast asleep.

James jiggled him slightly with no response and then laughed quietly to himself.  He’d read somewhere that male felins had a tendency to doze off temporarily after their intense orgasms but he hadn’t expected Q to zonk out quite so spectacularly.  James slipped his arm out from under him and went to the bathroom to fetch a damp facecloth.  He was still hard but he ignored it in favour of cleaning up Q.  As he wiped him down he was reminded of that first morning after he’d been given Q.  As he’d used a cool damp cloth to soothe the sick and feverish felin that day he could never have guessed how precious he would become to James.  Or that one day he would take him as his lover.  Once they were both clean James tossed the cloth onto the floor and lay down once more, tugging a sheet up over them.  He gathered Q to his chest and kissed his forehead as he dozed.

Q started to rouse within a few minutes, stretching and sighing as he woke up.  His eyes opened and he blinked a few times before smiling up at James.

“Hello sleepyhead.”

Q blushed before burrowing his face into James’s neck.  He groaned.

“I fell asleep, didn’t I?  I’m so sorry…”

“Don’t be sorry,” James laughed, “I’ve had worse reactions to my lovemaking, believe me.”  Q looked up at him, a querulous look on his face.  “I once had a girlfriend who used to burst into tears every so often when she came." He confided.  "She said it was something about it being extremely intense.  She said it wasn’t a bad thing for her but it was a bit off-putting for me if she came first when it happened.”

Q grinned then and he looked playful.  He ran his hand down James’s stomach.

“That’s a point.  You didn’t come.”

“I’m okay.  You don’t have to…”  James groaned as Q’s slim fingers brushed over his balls and up over his still half-hard shaft. He laughed. “Alright, maybe you do…”

He rolled onto his back as Q pushed himself up onto one elbow.  Q kissed a spot on his chest.

“Did I do that?”

James looked down to see red marks from where Q’s claws had dug in.

“Mmmm.  It’s alright.  I kind of liked it.  I love the fact that you were able to lose control for me.”

“You like it when I scratch?  What about this?”

James yelled out as Q dropped his head and lightly bit his nipple.  His teeth were razor sharp and the bite sent a shiver down James’s body and straight to his cock.  James pushed his head back into the pillow and groaned.

“Oh God.  I can see I’ve created a monster here...” He joked.

Q grinned and leaned over to playfully bite him again.  James started laughing as Q ravaged his chest, slowly tapering off as Q’s inquisitive licks and nibbles headed down his body.  He shivered when his tongue dipped into his navel.

“Please…”

James wasn’t sure what he was asking for but he was rewarded by Q wrapping his fingers around his cock.  At first he barely moved his hand and gripped too tight but James soon realised that this was due to inexperience on Q’s part rather than any desire to tease.  James imagined it must have been how Q pleasured himself.  He put his hand over Q’s.

“Like this darling.”

He guided Q’s hand into stroking him, paying attention to the glans and Q soon caught on, sliding James’s foreskin back and forth.  James started to pant as Q leaned over and licked across the head of his cock, mixing his saliva with James’s precome and adding to the glide.  The drag of his tongue added to the frisson and he jerked.

“Christ.  You’re going to make me come.”

Q smiled and sped up his stroking.  It wasn’t long before it was all too much for James and he came with a yelp, shuddering as he spurted over his own chest.  Q stroked him through it and well past the point of acceptable sensitivity.  With a shaking hand he reached down and grabbed his wrist, laughing.

“That’s enough.  That’s enough…” he gasped.

Q let go of him and licked his hand.  James groaned as he watched him suck his fingers into his mouth one by one, cleaning them slowly.  When he’d finished, Q dropped down and started to lap at the splashes of come on his skin.

“Oh darling.  You don’t have to do that.  There's a cloth...”

Q licked a broad, rough stripe over his ribs, tickling him and making him gasp.

“Don’t you dare stop me!  You taste wonderful.”

James grinned and lay back, totally relaxing as Q licked him all over.  Once he’d run his tongue over what felt like every inch of him he flopped down into James’s arms.  He kissed Q’s forehead as he snuggled into him.

“Was that okay for you?” James asked.  Q yawned, his eyes sliding shut.

“More than okay.” He said quietly and then added. “I really didn’t expect it to be like that.”

“Like what?”

“Fun.  Easy. It was nice.”

“It was.” James agreed, his own eyes closing and he wrapped his arms around Q.  “It was very nice.  That’s how it’s supposed to be darling.  That’s how it will always be from now on.”

Q raised his head to look at him fondly.

“Do you promise?”

James kissed him.

“I swear it.”

Q looked at him for a second and then rested his head again.  

“Thank you.”

 

 

 


	13. ii.v

_“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.”_

James read ‘A Tale Of Two Cities’ when he was at school.  As a bored fourteen-year-old he never really understood the opening line but now he thought he did.  He had never realised before how one could feel so happy and yet so apprehensive at the same time.  Following the video going viral James had once again been suspended from active field work but he found that this time, unlike his first suspension, he didn’t mind one bit.  He’d begun working in Operations with Tanner full-time, advising field agents and guiding them through difficult missions and he found he quite enjoyed it.  Beaumont was thrilled as that meant Q could spend five days a week working with him too.  Q’s fierce intellect and frankly unusual way of looking at problems meant he’d managed to work persistent bugs out of several of Beaumont’s projects, including a couple that had been mothballed years before.  For his part, Q loved being useful to the organisation that had saved and protected him.

At home, Q shared a bed with James permanently and they regularly made love – up to a point anyway.  James sometimes felt like a horny teenager cheating on his vow of chastity.  He adored Q and took great delight in pleasuring him but he still couldn’t bring himself to have intercourse with him.  He wasn’t sure what was stopping him exactly.  Certainly not Q.  The felin had embraced the new sexual aspect to their relationship with an enthusiasm that had surprised James but the fact was he was still Q’s owner and it just seemed like going a step too far.

The shadow which hung over their happy lives was the threat of Tiago Rodrigues finding them.  They were constantly watched by the agents assigned to them and the glimpses of them that James saw on a daily basis only served to remind him of the danger that Q was in.  James hated the fact that every time they left the house they were tailed.

~00Q~

One of Q’s favourite places in London was the South Bank of the River Thames, specifically the book market by the Southbank Centre.  If he’d been allowed to he would probably have happily spent hours on end pouring over the various books on offer.  James wasn’t a big fan of books (since leaving school he only read the occasional spy novel; more to laugh at the wild inaccuracies than anything) but he loved the market almost as much as Q did, although for different reasons he suspected.  Q loved the books, James loved the way the books brought a smile to Q’s face.  Sundays were their favourite days for visiting the market (or as Q called it ‘going to see the books’).  They rarely had anywhere they needed to be afterwards and if the weather was fine they used it as a stopping point on one of their many long walks.

It was a hot Sunday in late September when they decided to visit the market before walking on to Southwark and they’d both shed their jackets by the time they’d got onto the train for Waterloo.  Q seemed relaxed and he smiled as they chatted about the week before.  As Q and James sat holding hands, the felin a long warm line pressed into his side, James could see several women on the train stealing admiring glances at his companion.  The cut on his cheek had faded to a small pink line and James looked at it as Q chatted.  That little mark was a reminder of Alec’s assault on him.  And also of the way their relationship had changed.  It had been ten weeks since Alec attacked Q.  Ten weeks since they first made love.  James smiled as he watched Q speak.  His eyes sparkled and he waved his free hand as he described a circuit board he’d modified for Beaumont.  He really was beautiful and, not for the first time, James wondered how he ever got to be so lucky as to meet such a remarkable young felin.

James blinked when he realised Q had stopped talking and was staring at him, a smile on his face.

“You haven’t listened to a word I’ve said, have you?”

James laughed and kissed the small scar he’d been looking at.

“Am I that obvious?”

Q grinned and snuggled into him.

“You get that look on your face.”  He said quietly.

“What look?”

“Like there’s no-one else in the world.”

James ducked down and kissed the side of his neck.

“There isn’t.  You’re the only one for me, pussycat.” He said loudly.

Q blushed and nudged James with his elbow before turning his head towards the window.

“God, you’re so embarrassing.”

“You love it though.” James whispered loudly into his ear, nipping the soft edge of it between his lips and making Q shiver as his breath tickled him.  “Say you love it.”

Q laughed, his white teeth flashing.

“I love _you_.”

The train pulled into the station while James was still messing around and he was sure he heard a girl tell her friend “ohmyfuckinggod that’s just so _cute_ ” as they stood up to leave.  Q took his hand and they strolled along the platform, only letting go of each other to get through the ticket barrier.  The sun was warm on them as they exited the station and headed towards the Thames.  They reached the book market quickly and then they took up their usual positions – Q thumbing through the tomes on offer while James stood behind him with his hands resting on Q's hips.  Occasionally Q would hold a book up to comment on it or show James an illustration and James would cuddle in and peer over Q’s shoulder to look at it.  James would then kiss his hair before going back to his watchful stance.

The agents assigned to protect them were an ever-present part of their lives now and James spotted the MI5 agent Coatham thumbing through a stack of paperbacks a few tables over.  He relaxed a little.  M had been resolute in her plan to track down the man who murdered Boothroyd.  The fact that her plan also protected Q made James very happy.  Q held up another book, a hardback copy of ‘A Brief History of Time’.

“May I get this one please?  I know it’s a bit expensive, it’s twenty quid, but it’s an early edition and Father had one just like this…”

James kissed his temple.

“You know you can have any of them that you want.”

James took out his wallet and passed it to Q who delved into it and took out a twenty pound note to give to the bookseller.  Giving James his wallet back Q tucked his new book into the crook of his arm and turned to leave.

And stopped.

James almost walked into the back of him before he realised he’d frozen.

“Q?”

Q’s tail started to wag as he gazed at the crowds of people funneling to walk past the tables of books.  James put his hand on Q’s shoulder.

“Darling?”

Q tilted his head slightly and let out a shaky breath.

“I thought… I thought I saw someone I knew… one of Tiago’s men.  I can’t see him now though…”

James looked over Q’s shoulder, scanning the crowd, trying to see what he’d seen.  Out of the corner of his eye he saw Coatham staring.  He’d noticed that something was wrong.

“Where was he kitten?”

“By the steps.  I… I don’t see him now though.”  James wrapped his arm around Q from behind.  He waited patiently.  He didn’t want to bombard him with questions if he was still processing what he’d seen.  This wasn’t the first time Q had thought he’d seen someone he recognised from his time with Tiago.  After a moment he felt Q start to relax.  “Maybe I imagined it…” He sounded uncertain though.

“Let me make the call anyway.”  James said gently.

James had already taken his phone out and he quickly dialled.  Coatham answered.  Out of the corner of his eye he could see the other agent now had his back to them and was facing the same way as them.

 _“Maureen!  I thought you’d never call.”_ The agent answered merrily.

“Over by the steps, ten o’clock.”

 _“He didn’t!  What did Barry say?”_  Coatham chatted blithely as he subtly adjusted his stance to look where James was directing him to.

“Description Q.”

Q immediately started to tell him what he’d seen in a low voice.

“He’s six foot two, three maybe.  Dark hair, crew cut, tanned caucasian.  He’s wearing a white t-shirt with a dark blue design on it – not sure what of.  Blue jeans.  He’s carrying something black.  A bag or a jacket or something.  That’s… that’s all I saw.”

James quickly related everything Q was saying and then rung off.

“Let’s get you out of here.”

Q nodded and allowed James to take his hand again.  They walked away from the river side and found a little café tucked in under a railway arch where they sat side by side away from the windows.  James ordered them both drinks and then put his arm around Q.

“How are you feeling?”

“A little on-edge if I’m honest.  I really thought I recognised him.” He leant his elbows on the little table they were sitting at and dropped his head.  “Urgh.  I don’t know.” He shrugged.  “His name was Franco.  He was actually one of the nicer ones... If any of those fucks could be described as nice.”  He sighed, obviously frustrated.  “Oh God.  I fucking hate this.”

James ran his fingers up into Q’s hair and kissed the side of his face softly, nudging up the arm of his glasses.

“You never cease to amaze me.” He whispered.  “You’re so brave.  Some people would never have left the house again after what happened to you.”

Q shrugged again.

“I don’t feel brave.” He admitted.  “I feel terrified sometimes.”

“Bravery isn’t an absence of fear sweetheart.  That’s what stupidity is.  Bravery is being resolute despite the fear.  Without feeling fear I’m not sure you can ever truly be brave.”

Q huffed out a quiet laugh.

“Does that mean you get frightened sometimes?  You must do because by your logic if you don’t feel fear you’d be mad to do what you do for a living.”

James scratched the back of one of Q’s ears and smiled.

“Well.  I might be a little bit.”  He kissed the side of Q’s mouth and then sat up straight as the waiter brought over their order.  He waited until the man had left them again before he carried on talking.  “I wanted to talk to you about that actually.” He said as he watched Q add sugar to his tea.  “I had a meeting with M last week.  I might not be going back out into the field.”

Q took a sip of his tea.

“How come?”

“I told her I wasn’t prepared to leave you until this thing with Tiago is resolved and who knows when that will happen.  I’m only two years away from the mandatory age of retirement from the Double 0 programme as it is and the job I’m covering now with Tanner in Operations…  If I’m honest, I quite like it.  I wasn’t sure I would but I find that I’m quite content there.  It’s challenging enough that I don’t get bored and I get to spend all of my down time with you.”  Q put his cup down and reached over to hold James’s hand.  “I’ve asked M.  I’ve put in an application to take over the post permanently, pending the recruitment of a suitable replacement Double 0 agent.”

Q looked unsure.

“Are you sure that’s what you want?  Your other job means so much to you.”

James felt his mouth twitch into a smile.

“Not as much as you do.”

Q blushed and James couldn’t resist leaning over to kiss him slowly and thoroughly.  Q smiled into it.  When they eventually broke for air James freed up his hand to pick up his coffee and drink some of it.

“That’s not all.”  James continued.  “I asked M for a pay rise on the proviso that I make you available to Beaumont every hour that I’m at work.  She’s agreed that when I take on the role permanently I’ll be paid an additional twelve thousand pounds a year for the loan of you.  I’m going to put the extra money into a bank account for you.  It’s yours.” He hesitated. “If that’s what you want, that is.  I know I can be a bit headstrong at times, deciding things for you without asking so I thought…”

He was cut off when Q leaned over and kissed him again.

“It sounds wonderful.  I love working with Beaumont and being there full time on a permanent basis will be brilliant but you don’t need to pay me.” He smiled.  “Slaves don’t get wages James.” He added, a little sadly.

“I want you to though.” James said, stubbornly.  “You’ve been such an asset to Beaumont, I want you to be rewarded for it.  I know it’s not much but by the time you’re free you’ll have a nice little nest egg.”

“I don’t know what to say.”

James ran a finger tenderly over the back of Q’s wrist.

“Say yes. Please.”

Q laughed.

“Okay then.  Yes.”

They’d almost finished their drinks when James’s phone rang.  He looked at the caller ID.  It was Coatham.  He answered it.

“Call me Maureen again and I’ll have your balls.”  He deadpanned.

 _“No sign.”_ The agent responded. _“Spoke to Vicky.  She checking but she can’t see Tiddles anywhere.  Mum’s sending a car.  Five minutes.”_

“Understood.”  James responded and then hung up.  Q was watching him.  James knew that he would have overheard everything that the agent said and that he would have understood the code Coatham used.  Vicky; Vauxhall.  Tiddles; Tiago.  Mum; M.

“We have to go, don’t we?” He asked a little bit sadly.

James nodded.

“Operations are checking the cameras but there’s no sign of Tiago in the area.  They want us out of here anyway.  If you did see one of his men it may be that he’s just here to observe.  His seeing you might actually work in our favour but we need to plan ahead rather than risk anything today.”

Q nodded, a glum expression on his face.

“Okay.” He said quietly.

James watched him as he finished his tea.  Q was trying not to look disappointed but James knew he’d been looking forward to their walk all week.  When they’d woken up that morning and seen the fine weather it had seemed perfect.

James’s phone chirruped and he checked the text message he’d just received.

“Car’s here.”

They got up, Q clutching his new book to his chest as James paid the bill.  A black BMW was parked a few yards away and they went over to it and climbed in the back.

“What are your instructions?” James asked the driver.

“I’m to take you anywhere you want to go for as long as you want me today Sir.” The man replied, easing out into the traffic.

“Head west.” James instructed. “We’re going to Richmond Park.”

“Yes Sir.”

James sat back and Q leaned into him.

“Richmond Park?”

“Let’s finish our walk in peace.”

~00Q~

Their afternoon had turned out quite well in the end.  They hadn’t walked far in the park but their driver had stood back at a respectful distance, keeping watch, as James and Q had gone to a secluded spot and lain down under the trees.  It had been peaceful.  The soft whispering of the breeze in the trees almost drowned out the ever-present drone of faraway traffic and the rumbling of jets powering down to land at Heathrow.  Q had dozed, his head pillowed on James’s shoulder and James had cradled him, brushing his lips over his forehead.

They got back to the flat around five o’clock.  Neither of them felt much like eating yet so James made them both mugs of tea before they retired to the lounge.  Q immediately grabbed a couple of cushions and sat on the floor by the window, using the last of the daylight to enjoy his new book.

James sat in the armchair next to him and watched him.  Q’s face was animated as he read.  He would scan the pages quickly, a smile twitching his lips or a frown occasionally creasing his brow.  He kept laughing quietly and eventually explained to James that a previous owner had written notes in the margins.  Q said their calculations and theories were all terrible.  James noticed how Q’s hand kept creeping unconsciously to his throat, stroking his neck.  He wondered if it was because he wasn’t wearing his collar.  He picked up his mug but had barely swallowed a mouthful before his phone rang.  Glancing at the screen, he answered it.

“Tanner.”

_“Bond.  We’ve had a positive ID.”_

“I’m putting you onto speaker.”  He laid the phone down on his knee. “Q is here.”

_“You were right Q.  Our crowd recognition software has picked out a known criminal; Francois Lejeune.  Born 1973, Belgian national.”_

Q put his book face-down beside him, open at the page he’d been reading.

“That’s him.”  He said quietly.  “Francois.  His nick-name is Franco.”

_“We’re working on tracing his movements both before and after he was seen on the riverbank.  Give us a few hours and we should have an idea of where he travelled from.  The software has also picked up a number of possible matches to other people on our database but no-one who looked like Tiago has shown up yet.  We’re still going through the archives though.  We think Lejeune was probably there scoping out the area.  When you come in tomorrow morning we’d like you to go through a few mugshots and stills from the footage Q.  See if you recognise anyone else.”_

Q nodded.

“Of course.  Anything to help.”

Tanner thanked them for their time and then rang off.  Q picked up his mug of tea and James saw how his hands trembled as he raised the mug to his lips and the other hand stroked his neck again.

“Tiago probably wasn’t there.” James said after a minute’s silence. “He’ll have sent his men to find you.  To find us.  Lejeune most probably left once he realised you’d seen him.  If Tiago has any sense he’ll make his move quickly now.”  Q put down his mug, nodding.  “Are you feeling alright?”  Q nodded again.

“I am, actually.”  He said in a quiet voice.  “I’m not sure I’ve ever really felt free of Tiago.  I’ve never really relaxed, thinking he’s about to jump out at me at any moment.  Now I know he’s tracking me down, that he’s likely to try something… It’s almost a relief.  To know that any day now there will be a resolution.  Whatever happens he won’t be haunting me anymore.”

James watched him as he sipped his tea again.  As he tilted his head back James saw how his eyes were shining with unshed tears.  His hand cupping the base of his own throat again.  Suddenly making a decision, James went out into the hallway.  When he returned Q saw what he had in his hands.

“Are we going out somewhere?”

James shook his head as knelt down beside Q and carefully put his collar around his neck, buckling it loosely.  Once secure he sat down, resting on one hand.  With the other he ran his finger under the soft leather.

“You’ve done nothing but touch your neck since I took this off you.”

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to.”

James smiled.

“It’s OK.” His smile faltered as he stopped caressing the collar and took up one of Q’s hands. “I haven’t always been the best owner for you.”

“James…”

“Growing up with Kincade and Marnie, and before that with my parents, I was always taught that slavery was inherently wrong.  Kincade would tell me stories of slaves being permanently scarred by their manacles or collars.  I would have nightmares about them as a child… When you were given to me I didn’t want to impose anything like that on you...” He looked down at their entwined hands.  “You had that fucking awful collar strangling you when we met.  It was like all my worst fears had come true.  Tiago had dominated you and I hated it. The more I got to know you the more I resented the fact that I owned you. I wanted you to be my equal.  This collar.  I’ve stopped you from wearing it in here because to me it represents the very thing I loathe but it means something quite different to you, doesn’t it?”

Q smiled.

“Soft collars like this one.  They’ve always shown me that my owner cares.  That they love me.  They alway make me feel safe in a way.  My father… he bought me several.  He would give them to me for my birthdays.  Christmases.  I was always excited when I was a kitten to outgrow one and have to get a new one.  I always wore one around the house.  When you told me you didn’t want me to wear this one all the time it made me little sad but I understood.”

James smiled and then leant forward to kiss him softly.

“I’ve been arrogant.  I just didn’t think that it could mean anything positive for you.  I’ve tried to be a good owner but I was the worst person you could have been given to really.  I should have asked you how you felt about so many things.  ” He said a little sadly.

Q smiled back.  He clambered up so he could straddle James’s lap.

“Yeah, you stupid monkey.”  He mocked gently as he threaded his fingers up through James’s short hair and scrubbed his fingernails over his scalp.  “You’ve been terrible.  You gave me my own bedroom, a huge wardrobe full of designer clothing and an allowance.  Well, you call it an allowance but you hardly ever let me spend any of it because you insist on buying me everything that I want.  You’ve taken me to your bed and become my lover and found me a job that pays me actual wages and I _never_ get told off for anything…”

James chuckled and slid his hands up Q’s back under his shirt.  He pressed his face into Q’s chest.

“Am I really that bad?”  He laughed quietly, kissing him through his t-shirt.

“Oh, the worst…”

“So what do you think I should do to make myself a better owner?”  He asked, running his fingers over the smooth skin under his hands.  “Should I be stricter?  Tell me what I should do.”

“Oh there’s dozens of things you could do but I think you should start by sending me to bed.”

“Without any dinner?”

“Without any dinner.”

“I suppose I should come too, shouldn’t I?”  James reached up and tugged Q’s t-shirt off over his head.  He kissed his chest again.  “My darling kitten.”

~00Q~

They spent the whole evening talking, making love and eating dinner in bed - once James had summoned up the willpower to stop touching Q for more than two minutes and actually get his arse into the kitchen, that was.

The next morning they stood in the shower together, slowly and thoroughly washing each other.  Sharing their early-morning shower had made them late for work more times than James could count so he’d got into the habit of setting the alarm on his phone to go off at the time they really should be getting out and getting dressed.  The plan was fool-proof… except the alarm had gone off five minutes ago and they were still snogging slowly and idly washing the soap-suds off each other’s skin.

“We should go.” Q whispered.

“Mmmm.”

“We might be late.”

“Mmmmmmm.”

Q smiled.

“We are going to be late again, aren’t we?”

“Probably…”

“Won’t M be cross?”

“M’s always cross…”

“Beaumont’s expecting me.”

“Tanner’s expecting me…”

“You promised me you wouldn’t let me make us late again.”

James sighed and stopped kissing him.

“I did, didn’t I?”  He grinned.  “Alright Jiminy…”

Q poked him.

“You’re a grown man!  You shouldn’t need someone else to act as your conscience!” He sniffed. “And besides, _I_ am not an insect!” He added primly.

“No you’re not.” James said, snagging his waist and kissing his neck playfully.  “You’re my darling, gorgeous, clever little pussycat…” Q snuggled into his embrace for a moment before elbowing his way out of James’s arms.

“You say the sweetest things.  Come on monkey man.  We need to get dressed.”

James laughed and finally let him go.  He was more than halfway to getting an erection again .

“Go on then.  Go and put some pants on before I change my mind and phone us both in sick, you sexy young scamp.”

Q gave him one last kiss and stepped out of the shower.  He quickly cleaned his teeth and brushed his hair.  He dried off before putting on his collar.  As James started to clean his teeth, Q slipped on his underpants and trousers and left the room.  As James stood brushing he wondered at himself.  Fast approaching fifty, body scarred and battered, he wondered what it was about him that Q loved so much?  Was it the kindness he’d shown him or just the difference between himself and the monster who held him for five years?  Still pondering he finished up and wandered through into the bedroom as he towelled his hair dry.

 

 

He barely had time to register that there was a strange man standing in the room and holding a gun to Q’s head before he was struck hard from behind and everything went black.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Muahaha.
> 
> Sorry*
> 
> *not sorry


	14. ii.vi

As James slowly regained consciousness he frowned at the incessant thumping at the base of his skull.

He turned his head, trying to lift his face off the carpeted floor it was pressed onto and the thumping was replaced by a rhythmic, lancing pain. He groaned. He was freezing cold, still naked from his shower. He shifted, trying to move his hands and realised they were trussed behind him, secured with what felt like tight metal cuffs. He tried to get his knees under himself to push himself up but found his limbs didn’t want to cooperate. After struggling for a moment he lay still and tried to take stock of his situation, wondering how long he’d been out. He squinted at the décor of the room he was in. Laminated furniture, heavy duty carpet, wallpaper that showed signs of scuffing. Unless he was very much mistaken, he was in a hotel room but it smelt musty and slightly dank. There was a thin layer of dust covering everything. He wondered if the building was deserted. Closed down and ear-marked for demolition maybe.

He slowed his breathing and listened intently. He couldn’t hear much over the pounding in his head but he was reasonably sure he was on his own in the room. He wondered why he’d been brought there. If Tiago wanted Q surely they would have just killed James. Unless he intended to use him as leverage somehow. He wondered how quickly the agents watching them would realise that they’d been taken. His hair still felt damp so they couldn’t have been taken that long ago. He flexed his fingers and tried to feel around the cuffs. They were so tight his fingers felt numb and he could barely twist in them enough to even brush the pads over the cool metal. Despite everything, he looked around to see if there was anything he might use to pick the lock. He’d barely started to scan the floor before he heard voices outside the door. He immediately relaxed, closing his eyes and feigning unconsciousness.

The door opened.

“Look, my clever boy.” A man said in a heavy accent. “I told you I had kept your precious thief safe and sound. I think maybe he is pretending at playing dead though. Let’s see if we can wake him up shall we?” There was a slight pressure to James’s lower back and then everything was a white-hot sea of pain. It seemed to go on forever but James knew rationally that the Taser was probably only in contact with his skin for five seconds or so. He grunted when the severe cramping caused by the electrical charge finally relented. He sagged back down onto the floor before two sets of hands hauled him up by his armpits onto his knees. Now more or less upright he squinted up at his blond-haired captor.

Tiago Rodrigues.

“Oh, but he is lovely, clever boy!” He cooed, apparently delighted. “Not classically handsome by any means but such blue eyes and look at this body! Battered yes, but so strong! And his cock; so large! Did you enjoy it when he fucked you with it? Did you suck it for him like a good boy?”

James ignored the man’s taunting and looked at Q who was standing next to him. He was still dressed in just his checked trousers, the ones that James adored on him. His face was bruised and he cradled one hand to his chest. His knuckles looked bloody and bruised and James realised with some satisfaction that Q must have fought back when they took them. Q wasn’t tied up but James’s collar had been replaced by an ugly-looking wide thing which was metal-plated and padlocked just like the one he was wearing when James first met him. Q was trembling and looked terrified, never taking his eyes off James as Rodrigues mocked him.

“You must have had him regularly,” Tiago continued, “to warrant interfering with the camera in your bedroom. I must thank my boy for being such a slut. Without that window of opportunity we might never have been able to take you unseen.” James’s stomach sank as he realised how stupid he’d been. He’d disabled the camera in the one room of the house which wasn’t directly visible from the main street. “Of course, such wanton behaviour must stop now that he is back with me. Perhaps I will dispense with the locks and devices. Maybe this time I will just have him neutered.”

Tiago reached up to grasp the back of Q’s neck and James snarled and jerked towards the man, suddenly furious. Tiago jumped but before James could get to his feet one of the men standing behind him kicked him in the back. He gasped as he felt the dull snap of a rib breaking. He’d barely taken another breath when the Taser shocked him again. He fell to the floor in another full-body rictus. He must have blacked-out for a second as the next thing he knew, he’d been dragged up onto his knees once more.

“Oh now Mr Bond.” Tiago mocked. “You should not be so concerned with what I do with my own property! You should be more concerned with your own fate. Did you think I would let it stand? That you would go unpunished? Did you think I would let you take my boy away from me? Q is mine; it was always meant to be this way. Even when the pathetic old fuck that my cat called ‘Father’ was alive. I first saw Q when he was still a kitten you see. I was in London to received my weapons training with that old fool Boothroyd. He boasted about Q - he was so proud of him - and I could see how brilliant he was, even then. Even though Boothroyd refused to sell Q to me, I knew I would have him in the end. Such a clever boy! I might have let Boothroyd live” he mused, “but he was a particular favourite of M and when she betrayed me to the Chinese… well. What comes around goes around, don’t you think? We must all of us think on our sins in the end… And you’re end is so very near now.”

“You told me you would let him live.” Q said timidly.

Tiago looked at him fondly and pushed his fingers up into the back of Q’s hair. He gripped it cruelly tight.

“Did I say that? I don’t recall.” He mocked. Q tried to look at James again but Tiago twisted his hand viciously, forcing Q to look at him instead. “He stole you away from me, my sweet cat. I cannot let that go unpunished.”

“He didn’t steal me.” Q pleaded, he began to get agitated, shifting from one foot to the other. “I ran away. It was me. All me. Please, punish me instead.”

Tiago grinned.

“I will get around to you in good time. And as to whether he stole you away or not, he kept that which was not his to keep. I cannot forgive him for that.”

“But you promised.” Q begged, suddenly struggling. “Please don’t hurt him!”

Tiago suddenly straightened his arm, shoving Q away from him. Q stumbled into the wall. Regaining his balance, he looked on and caught up the end of his tail as he watched Tiago, his bottom lip trembling.

“Be quiet now. I have had enough of your talk. I will show you what happens to people who cross me. This will be a lesson for you that you will not forget in a hurry I think.”  James kept his eyes on Q. He looked distraught and James realised with a dawning sadness that there was absolutely nothing he could do to help him. The head injury was making it difficult for him to think straight and there was no way he could get out of the cuffs. He hoped that Tiago was right about karma though. If so, he deserved every single bad thing that fate no doubt had in store for him. James wondered again if MI6 had spotted they’d been taken yet. He cursed his stupidity at having moved the camera. Tiago’s men must have hacked the feeds. Known they could enter the flat through the bedroom window undetected. Tiago looked at his watch.

“Look at the time!” He exclaimed. “If you gentlemen would like to prepare the vehicles I will finish up here. Dispose of the rubbish, if you will.” Tiago’s thugs left and he walked over to James, grabbing a handful of his hair. He yanked James’s head back, exposing his throat as he reached under his jacket and withdrew a large hunting knife . James fought to beat down the wave of darkness that swamped his vision for a second. He fought to stay conscious for Q and tried to resist the urge to swallow hard as he felt the flat of the blade touch his throat. “Do you have any last words for your kidnapper Q? Before I show him what happens to men who take other people’s property?”

Q shifted and as the blade turned, the razor sharp edge now pressing up against the side of his neck, and James thought he saw it; the exact moment Q’s fear turned to anger.

“No.” He whispered. His finger hooked slightly, growing rigid as his claws began to extend. He bared his teeth. “Don’t.”

James tried to smile, tried to calm Q and show him it was all OK. Given years instead of mere seconds he wasn’t sure he could make him understand how much he meant to him. How much he adored him. How much he wished that he could be safe from men like Rodrigues. And of how much he hoped that Q wasn’t about to do something stupid. Instead he simply watched Q as the knife shifted and the sharp edge sliced his skin. He said;

“I love you darling kitten.”

And then;

“Please don’t watch.”

He closed his eyes, not wanting for Q to see the life fade from them and then…

The world turned upside down.

As he felt the knife begin to cut into him there was a high-pitched, awful shriek of anguish. The knife jerked away and he opened his eyes just in time to see Q leap, hurling himself at Tiago. They fell together and slammed in James. He pitched sideways and, unable to stop himself, the side of his head struck the wall next to him. As consciousness faded for the second time that day, the last sound he heard was agonised screaming…

~00Q~

“Wake up.”

The voice spoke urgently but James wasn’t sure why he should care.

_“Wake up!”_

It sounded familiar but James shifted. Five more minutes sleep. Just five; that was all he wanted.

“For fuck’s sake James, any other time you’d have woken up of your own accord and done a bunk by now!”

There was a sharp pain to his cheek and then his earlobe was pinched and twisted viciously. He awoke fully with a start. He looked around himself groggily.  Medical. He was in Medical.

Doctor Conroy was leaning over him.

“Did… did you just slap me?” He asked, bemused.

“I’m sure the General Medical Council wouldn’t approve my techniques,” She said grim-faced as she tugged on him to make him sit up. “But you need to shift your arse. Tanner’s just rung down. They’re going to take Q away.”

“Wait… what?” He staggered as she hauled him up onto his feet and everything came rushing back. Tiago. The knife. The screaming. “Where is he? Is he alright? I need to see him.”

“That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you! That’s why I’ve just broken pretty much every rule I have about treating patients who have been knocked out James. They have him down on the detention level. He killed that man - his old owner - and now he’s being taken to be euthanized!”

“No!” James stumbled towards the door. After two steps Conroy grabbed his arm and put her arm around his waist, holding him up. He leant on her heavily and they made their way to the lift.

“A member of the public spotted one of the retrieval team who’d moved in to rescue you. They saw the gun she was carrying and called the police,” She explained. “The agents tried to smooth things over with them but one of the officers realised that Q had killed Tiago and saw his collar. They put in a formal complaint that MI6 were harbouring an owned slave who’d committed a murder.”

“But… he was saving me. Saving himself. It was self-defence…”

The lift arrived and Conroy dragged him inside. For a small woman, she was remarkably strong. She stabbed at the buttons for the detention level.

“Come on James,” She spat angrily, “You know as well as I do that doesn’t mean a damned thing. When you’re owned there _is_ no defence. It was blindingly obvious that he killed a man so he must be put down. That’s the law. Tanner said he pretty much tore the man’s throat open with his bare hands. He was covered in his blood and screaming because they were trying to take you away from him when the police got there.” She added. The lift door opened and they staggered out into the detention area.

He supposed they must have made quite a sight; a beaten up double-oh agent in a puke green hospital robe and an angry-looking doctor, almost a foot shorter than him, dragging his sorry arse down the corridor. To be honest though, he couldn’t have given less of a shit. Tanner was waiting for them outside the door of the cell – the same cell he and Q first met in, his addled brain less-than-helpfully supplied. When the canin saw them he spoke to the guard on duty who unlocked the door and stood aside. Conroy stopped at the threshold and he staggered in alone.

Q was standing in the middle of the cell, tall and proud. He was still dressed in just his checked trousers but the hideous collar was gone. He was covered in dried blood. His hands had been wiped clean but his whole body, from his face to his feet, was spattered. When he saw James he sobbed out a heart-breaking laugh and he rushed to put his arms around him.

“James. I didn’t think I would get to see you again.” They embraced and James rested his head on Q’s shoulder, suddenly wearier than he’d ever felt in his life. He felt numb with grief. The felin held him close as James moaned in anguish as he realised the enormity of their situation. “Don’t, my love. Please don’t. It’s OK.” James shook his head, burrowing his face into the crook of Q’s neck, smelling his warm scent.

“It’s not OK.” He whispered. “They want to take you away from me. They’re going to...” He choked, words failing him. His sorrow felt monstrous, dwarfing the sadness that he’d felt when he thought Tiago was about to murder him. “Why did you do it kitten? Why did you kill him? They would have saved you anyway. The agents assigned to us would have saved you.”

“But he was going to kill you. I couldn’t stand by and watch him do that.” He kissed the side of James’s face. Unbelievably then he laughed again and this time it was beautiful. “All this time and I still don’t think you realise just how much I love you.” He teased. James pulled back to look at him, astonished.

“But I’m just…”

“You’re my owner,” Q said softly, “but more than that, you’re everything to me and I couldn’t face living without you.”

“But how am I supposed to live without you?” James asked helplessly. He looked around. “I’ll get you out of here. I’ll find a way. Tanner will help us…”

Q smiled again; a terribly sad, wonderful sight. He stroked the pad which covered the cut in the side of James’s neck.

“You’re in no fit state. You’re barely staying upright as it is.” Q cupped the back of James’s head and ran soothing fingers through his hair, carefully avoiding his injuries. “And besides, you’ve already saved me once. You don’t get to do that twice.” James shook his head. “You took me in.” Q continued softly. “You showed me love when I’d forgotten such a thing existed. You were so gentle, so patient, despite everything that you do for a living you still had enough love left in you; you were still able to take a confused, frightened kitten and bring him back from the brink.” Q’s voice broke at the last word and he moved forward then, kissing James tenderly. James hugged Q as tightly as he dared, desperate to remember everything. The taste, the feel and the smell of the one person he adored more than anything.

They were still wrapped in each other’s arms when the door opened and M entered carrying a wallet file.

“You’re both here, good. Christ, Bond, you look like hell. Get what’s left of your sorry arse back up to Medical immediately. That’s an order. I’ll be having words with Doctor Conroy presently about the security arrangements in her department.” James opened his mouth to argue with her, to tell her to go to hell. He wouldn’t leave Q, he couldn’t. He… M turned to Q, ignoring James. “And as for you. As an owned otherkind you would have been aware of the consequences of your actions and yet you killed a man to save one of my agents regardless.” Q nodded, staring at her calmly. Resolute in the face of his fate. “You realise that there would have been no defence in law for what you had done if you were not a free feline and I would have had no choice but to turn you over to the appropriate authorities.”

“I… wait. What?” Q frowned, trying to make sense of what she’d just said.

She reached into her file and, extracting a piece of paper, held it out to Q. James released him from his embrace so he could take it off her.

“Boothroyd misled us.” She said. “I assumed that he was to file the paperwork for your emancipation on the day of your eighteenth birthday. I had Tanner do a little digging though and it transpires that he only informed you of your emancipation on that day. He actually filed the paperwork a month before that. Which means you were already a free citizen on the date that Boothroyd died and had been for over a week.”

Q frowned, studying the paperwork.

“No,” He mumbled, raising a shaking hand to press his palm to his temple. “I was with him when he did it… it was on my eighteenth birthday, I’m sure of it… we went for ice-cream afterwards and…” James started to smile as he realised what was going on and nudged him with his elbow. Q looked up, confused.

“Q?" He said quietly, "Shut up.”

Q looked back at the paper, a worried look still on his face, and then back up at M who was also smiling at him. He suddenly gasped and covered his mouth with his hand, re-reading the paperwork as the penny dropped.

“I’m free.” He whispered, tears welling up his eyes.

“And as you are a free citizen I am prepared to testify that any and all actions carried out by you today were done so under my explicit orders.” M said.

Q nodded, looking utterly stunned. He looked back at the piece of paper, like he expected it to burst into flames at any second. He looked back up at M.

“You did this.” He said.

“I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.” She said, tucking the file into the crook of her elbow. “Right, that’s sorted then. I’m going to ring the Commissioner of the Met. Get this cock up sorted out.” She turned to leave and paused at the door. “Oh, and Fortescue? I don’t supposed Bond is going to want you sponging off him now he knows you’re free. I suggest you get yourself a paid job. I should go to see Beaumont at nine o’clock tomorrow morning if I were you. He’ll be looking for an assistant now you won’t be working for him gratis anymore.” She left and Q turned to James.

“Fucking hell.”

James grinned and then staggered as a wave of weariness crashed over him. Q immediately forgot about the precious piece of paper in his hands and reached out to support him. The room swam as James’s legs finally gave out.

“Oh darling. We need to get you back into bed.” Q said.

 

~00Q~

_“We must all of us think on our sins.”_

_Tiago was streaked with gore, his throat bloody and torn._

_He’d found Q and was pressing a gun up against his head._

_James was paralyzed with terror and confusion as he watched the man threaten Q. Q was sobbing, shaking with fear._

_“You must pay for your arrogance.” Tiago sneered. “You’ve ruined Q. He won’t be loyal to me now. He says he loves you. What use is he to me if he loves you?”_

  
_James tried to answer but he was immobile. He wanted to tell Tiago to let him go. He wanted to leap at him. Beat him. But he could do nothing but watch as Tiago pulled the trigger, spattering James with Q’s precious lifeblood…_

He roared with anguish as he sat bolt-upright, tearing at his sodden clothing.

Q. He had to find Q.

He threw his legs over the side of the bed, pulling away the wires and tubes that were attached to him in his terror. The bathroom door flew open and Q ran in.

“Oh sweetheart! I’ve got you…” Q rushed over to the bed and wrapped his arms around James. He looked up at him in confusion. Q was fine. James took in a shaky breath as he pressed his face into Q’s body which came out as a sob and he trembled violently. He held onto him as tightly as he could. “Come on you silly monkey,” Q soothed. “It’s alright. I’ve got you now… Bloody hell. I leave you alone for two minutes…”

The door to the room opened and Conroy come in.

“He’s awake. I thought as much. The monitors on the front desk just went through the roof.” She bustled over and silenced the machines beside the bed which were all shrieking alarms at being suddenly disconnected. She then waited patiently as James struggled to compose himself.

“I thought you were dead.” He said once he’d calmed down enough to speak. “I saw Tiago kill you.”

“No darling. That must have been a dream. I’m okay. I killed him, remember?”

James shook his head as he tried to think. He remembered being in the shower with Q. And then something about a dirty hotel room. Q stroked the back of his head, cradling him to his chest, as he tried to make sense of his jumbled memories. Nothing seemed to fit.

“I… I don’t remember.”

“It’s okay James.” Conroy said gently. “You suffered a couple of vicious blows to the head. You seemed alright at first but there was subsequently a huge amount of swelling. You’ve been here for three days. Just give it some time and you might well find that your memories sort themselves out.”

James nodded and then pulled back when Q gently pushed on his shoulders.

“Why don’t we let Susan check you over darling?”

Q stepped away a little but not so far that he had to let go of James’s hand. James watched as Conroy took his blood pressure and temperature and checked his pupillary reflex. James winced at the brightness of her penlight.

“Sorry.” She said. “I know you’re probably as little photosensitive right now but it looks like you’re on the mend. Now. By the looks of things you’re not impressed with our choice of outfit for you so how about we clean you up and you get into your own clothes?”

James looked down at what he was wearing, a hideous municipal blue hospital gown that he’d almost managed to tear all the way off in his panic. It was drenched with sweat. A memory tickled at him. Hadn’t he been wearing a green one? He watched as Conroy pulled a chair over to the side of the bed and then she and Q took one of James’s arms each and gently guided him onto it. Q fetched a bowl of water from the bathroom while Conroy removed the remaining monitor leads from him. While Q tenderly began to wash him down, Conroy quickly stripped down and remade his bed with fresh linen.

All the time that Q worked, James kept reaching out to touch him; still not quite able to believe that he was okay. Q smiled at every caress, pausing every so often to kiss the side of James’s mouth sweetly. Once James was as clean as he was going to get, sitting there in the chair, Q went to a bag on the floor and pulled out a t-shirt and a pair of underpants for him. James obediently raised his hands so Q could put the t-shirt on him and winced as his back flared into pain.

“Be careful darling. You’ve got a cracked rib there.”

“Now you tell me.” He muttered and Q laughed at him affectionately.

“Poor baby.” He said, looking at him fondly.

He put James’s feet into his pants and then, between the three of them, they managed to stand him up, finish dressing him and get him back onto the side of the bed in one relatively smooth motion. James was trembling with exhaustion and his head was pounding again by the time he was able to finally relax.

“Will you stay with me?” He asked Q as he was guided to lie down again.

“Of course I will.”

“Lie with me?”

“No I couldn’t possibly.” Q deadpanned. “Apparently that’s against Medical’s policy.”

Conroy harrumphed good-naturedly.

“I know damn well you’ll do it the minute my back is turned so you might as well get in now Q.” Q smiled and quickly toed off his shoes. Pausing for a second, he then blushed as he took off his jeans too. He slipped into James’s waiting arms as Conroy tucked the bedding around them. “Right you two. No funny business. James has still got a heart-rate monitor on him which I can see at the front desk. I don’t want to come running in here in response to a spike to find you’re being inappropriate!”

Q grinned at her as he snuggled down.

James hardly noticed Conroy leave, he was too busy looking at Q. The bruises on his face were fading already but he kissed every one of them gently. Q’s knuckles were blemished too so he caught up his hand and kissed the bruising there as well. Another vague memory returned as he stroked Q’s long neck.

“He collared you.”

Q nodded as he shifted his head to bare his throat to James’s tender caresses.

“He did but it wasn’t on me long enough to hurt me.”

“Where’s your collar?”

“Tiago’s men took it off me before we left the flat. I found it on the bedroom floor when I went back to get cleaned up and pick up some things for you.”

“Did Tanner take you home?” James asked.

“No. M arranged for a driver to take me there but I didn’t know how long I’d be so I got the train back later on. I can do that now.” He added with a smile.

“On your own?” He asked him. Another seemingly fantastic memory scratched at the surface and James frowned. It couldn’t be… could it?

“Oh you darling man,” Q said gently. “You don’t remember do you? James, I’m free. M found a way to free me.”

“You’re…?”

Q grinned and kissed him tenderly. James shuddered and slipped his arms around him, kissing him back. Most of what had happened to them was still lost in the haze of his malfunctioning memory and it all seemed too wonderful but at the same time James somehow knew it to be true. Q was free. He quietly began to weep for the first time since Vesper died. Q chuckled and held him close as his tears fell.

“Fucking hell James. I’ve heard of head-injuries causing emotional turmoil but there's no need to cry like a little girl!”

James huffed out a laugh.

“You cheeky bloody pussycat.”

“At least I’m still your cheeky bloody pussycat.” Q smiled.

“Are you?” He asked uncertainly. “Are you really still mine?”

Q kissed him again.

“Always.”


	15. ii.vii

James spent another five days in Medical undergoing a range of scans and tests.  He complained loudly for four of them and swore blind that Conroy deliberately kept him in for the last two days simply because she hated him so much.  Q had smiled at him every time he complained and gently told him that if he wasn’t acting like such a grumpy old sod she might have let him out a bit sooner.  Q had asked Beaumont if he could take up his new permanent position of assistant technician in the New Projects department when James had recovered.  Beaumont had happily agreed and told Q the post was there for him as soon as he was ready.  Now he was free, Q could come and go as he pleased but he stayed with James almost constantly.  James got used to waking up, either with Q in his arms or to find the felin sitting in the chair next to him with his tail tucked around his feet and a book in his hand.

He was finally released on a murky Tuesday afternoon.  It was pelting with rain and Q told him that the weather had been dreadful all week.  James didn’t care though.  He was just happy to be going home and even happier that Q was going with him.  When James found he could finally think straight for longer than five minutes at a time he had taken Q’s hand and told him that he didn’t have to stay with him. _You’re free now kitten.  You can go anywhere… do anything… If you want to live on your own for a while to see what that’s like… if you want to travel… I’ll help you.  Anything you want… I just want you to be happy_.  Q had kissed his hand softly and told him not to be so bloody daft which had made James laugh and pretty much ended the conversation.

A staff car took them back to their home and Q helped James up to the flat, supporting him gently as he slowly walked to the lift and then in through the front door.  Once inside James relaxed.  It was good to be home.  Q kissed him and told him he was going to put the kettle on.  James wandered through to their bedroom, looking around him as he did.  There was a small dab of filler in the hallway where the camera had been and another in the bedroom.  He walked over to the window and saw that the latch had been replaced.  He reached out and ran his finger over it.

“MI6 sent two men to fix everything the day Tiago died.” Q said, coming into the room with two mugs in his hands.  He walked over and passed one to James.  “All the cameras had gone and everything was repaired by the time I came here to pick us up some things.  It’s a bit odd,” said Q, perching on the side of the bed, “I keep expecting for this place to feel different now but it doesn’t.”  James came over to sit next to him and sipped at his drink, slipping his free hand around Q’s waist.

“You’re the one that’s different.”  James said. “You’re free now.”

Q smiled.

“Mmmm.  You don’t own me anymore.” He said slyly.  James raised an eyebrow, guessing what Q was getting at.

“Cheeky kitten.  I’ve only been home five minutes …” He chuckled, leaning over to kiss the side of his neck.  He felt the vibration through his lips as Q began to purr.  “It’s strange,” he whispered, feeling Q shiver as his breath tickled the spot he’d just kissed, “I know I had you in my arms most nights in Medical but I missed this.  ”  He kissed the spot again.

Q took James’s mug off him and put it on the bedside table with his own.  He turned back climbed onto James’s lap, straddling him.

“I know this might not be the best time… if you’re not feeling recovered enough… but I want to feel your hands on me.”  James rested his hands on his hips and looking up at Q.

“What is it that you really want sweetheart? Would you like for us to make love?”

Instead of answering him Q nodded and kissed him, licking over his lips until he was able to slip his tongue into James’s mouth.  James groaned and gripped him as Q’s hips bucked, rubbing their crotches together.  His cock began to harden but after a moment his head started to swim too.  He gasped and had to pull away, dropping his chin down and resting his forehead on Q’s chest as he closed his eyes.

“Sorry kitten.  Give me a moment.  I can’t tilt my head back like that for too long.”

Q made a small sound of distress and he made to climb off James.

“Oh I’m sorry darling.  I shouldn’t have…”

James tightened his grip and stopped Q from moving .

“It’s alright.  We can, I want to.  I just need to take it easy, that’s all.  I tell you what.  Why don’t you strip off and get your gorgeous little arse into bed while I clean up in the bathroom?  I won’t be long I promise.”

Q climbed off him and slowly unbuckled his belt.

“Hurry back or I’ll start without you.” He teased.

James laughed as he went into the bathroom.  He worried as he quickly showered.  Q might finally be free but James was still a little nervous about trying to fuck him.  And he wasn’t exactly fighting fit after his stay in Medical… A thought suddenly occurred to him which made him laugh quietly to himself.  The perfect solution.  He finished washing and then hunted in the medicine cabinet.  He grinned when he found what he needed…

Barely ten minutes after leaving the bedroom James walked back in.  He was naked and half-hard with anticipation, his cock a heavy weight hanging between his legs.  Q was lying in the bed, propped on one elbow and he smiled when he saw him.  For all his prior eagerness, he looked nervous.

“How are you feeling now?” He asked, twitching back the covers so that James could get in next to him.  Instead of lying down James crawled onto the bed and grabbed a couple of the throw cushions which he piled up in the middle of the mattress.

“Not too bad.  The back of my head’s still a little tender.  Stretching up to kiss you was making me a little dizzy, that was all.” He explained.  Q smiled and watched as James rooted in the bedside table for a tube of lubricant.  Once he had it in his hand he unscrewed the cap and squeezed a dollop out onto his fingers.  As Q watched he reached behind himself as he spread his knees.  Q’s eyes widened.

“What… James what are you doing?”

James laughed.

“Preparing myself.  We’re going to fuck aren’t we?”

Q sat up.

“I thought… Oh James…”

James finished what he’d been doing and then laid down on his back so that the cushions supported his hips.  He spread his legs and snagged Q’s wrist.

“C’mon kitten.  Come over here and fuck me.”

Instead of moving Q knelt up and instead put a hand on James’s hip.

“James… is this… is this because you think you’ll hurt me if we do it the other way?”

Q stroked the skin under his fingertips.

“Maybe a little.” James admitted.  “But it’s also about making this special for you.  It’s about showing you how much I love you.  And it also might be a little bit to do with how I’m not quite feeling a hundred percent yet and lying flat on my back sounds like a good plan right about now.”

Q smiled and James noticed that for all his apparent reticence, his cock was standing up like a ramrod.  His long tail wagged slowly.

“I guess it just never occurred to me that you might want to do it this way.” He said.  James felt utterly exposed as Q crawled between his legs and ran his hands up his parted thighs.  He drew his knees up, so that Q could see that he was prepared for him.  He moaned at the first tentative touch of Q’s finger as it brushed over his slick arsehole.  “Are you sure this won’t hurt you?” Q asked.

“I haven’t done this for a while but if you go slowly I’m sure it will feel wonderful.  For you too I hope.”

He shivered when Q suddenly dropped down and licked up the crease of his thigh.  He then nuzzled into his pubic hair, licking and sucking one of James’s testicles into his mouth.  He ran his tongue over it before releasing it with a ‘pop’.  James trembled as he licked over the base of his cock and then nipped at his scrotum with his sharp teeth playfully, making him squirm with a laugh.  His laughter faded though when Q pushed a finger inside him.   James had taken his time to prepare himself thoroughly in the bathroom and his finger slid in easily.

“You feel so warm.” He murmured, kissing the inside of James’s thigh.  He nudged his cheek against it and James took the hint, spreading his legs wider and hooking his hands under his knees.  Q responded by slipping in another finger. “I don’t know if I’ll be much good at this.” He smiled. “I’m close to coming just thinking about being inside you…”

James knew what he meant.  Q tender explorations were driving him mad and his cock was drooling pre-come onto his belly already.

“Don’t come yet darling.” He begged.  “I want you inside me before you come.”

Q withdrew his fingers and then crawled up over James, before kissing him deeply.  James let go of his legs and thrust his hands up into Q’s hair.  He wrapped his legs around Q’s hips and urged him closer.  They both gasped as their erections touched.  Q broke off the kiss as James reached down to gently grasp him and guide him to his entrance.

“Like this sweetheart.”  He said quietly.

Q’s eyes slid shut as he moved forward tentatively.  James let go of his cock and put his hand over his hip.  He pulled on it, urging Q to push harder.  There was a brief moment of pain as the flared head of his cock slipped past the muscular ring of James’s arse and then a delicious sensation of fullness.  Q dropped his head onto James’s chest.

“Oh God…oh God…”

“Shhhhhh.  Give it a moment.  Get used to it before you try to move or you’ll come too soon.”

Q nodded and froze, almost as if he was scared to move.  He took a few deep breaths, trembling.  Once he calmed down a little he pushed forward again and James had to bite his lip to stop himself from crying out as the next flared ridge on Q’s cock stretched and then filled him. And then another.  And then another.  He reached up and grabbed the pillow under his head as he stretched out, willing his body to relax as Q kept pushing until their bodies were flush.  James smiled as Q opened his eyes and sat up until he was kneeling with his hands resting on James’s abdomen.

“Is this okay James?  I’m not hurting you am I?”

“I can honestly say, this is one of the most remarkable things that I’ve ever felt.  God.  The ridges on your cock are pushing against my prostate in the most exquisite way.”

Q shifted his hips from side to side slightly.

“What about now?”

James gasped and laughed.

“Holy shit!”

Q giggled and did it again.  Then resting one of his hands over James’s cock he withdrew by an inch and pushed back in.  James spread his legs wide again.

“Yes.  Please darling.” He pleaded.  “Do that again.”  Q wrapped his fingers around James’s cock and began to stroke him lightly as he bumped his hips.  James grunted as another drop of pre-come oozed out of his cock.  He’d once spent the night with a mark’s wife in Germany who, it turned out, had quite a taste for the kinkier aspects of lovemaking.  He’d experienced his one and only use of anal beads that night and had rather enjoyed the sensation of stretch and release they gave him.  Q’s cock was now having the same effect on him.  Rather than the usual smooth glide he associated with anal sex, there was a friction that was acting almost like a vibration deep within the most intimate part of him.  James’s orgasm suddenly blindsided him and he tried to warn Q but all that he could manage was a grunt as he started to come.

Q faltered and James grabbed at his hips, desperate to keep him inside him as he bucked.  Quickly reacting, Q stroked the head of James’s cock, encouraging him to give up every drop of come as he renewed his thrusting.  He only managed another half-dozen strokes though before he followed James.  They both yelled out as the ridges of his cock engorged and he started to come, trembling as the pressure increased.  James wrapped his arms around him when he slumped forward, effectively locked into James’s body by the tightness of their joining.  He kissed Q’s sweaty forehead as he rode out his pleasure, shivering his way through several waves of orgasm.

And then promptly passed out.

“Well, shit.” James muttered.

He started to chuckle when he realised his predicament.  Effectively pinned down under Q, he held him close and closed his eyes, patiently waiting for his sleeping lover to regain consciousness.

 

 

EPILOGUE – ONE YEAR LATER

Life, it turned out, was pretty bloody good, James reflected as he walked to the house that he now shared with Q.  They’d lived a charmed life since Q became a free citizen.  There were nights when James lay awake, worrying that life was a little _too_ good; that something was likely to go wrong at any minute but Q was always there to soothe him back to sleep.  They deserved a little happiness, Q would murmur, and thinking back over the years prior to their meeting, James would grudgingly agree.

Before he met Q he’d been running on empty, throwing himself into every mission, ignoring injury, ill-health and his own personal safety.  He’d been desperate to complete every mission and move onto the next without taking stock of what each one was costing him and he supposed he’d been like that ever since Vesper died.  Having Q to look after – and eventually to love – had slowed him down.  Made him live again.  Looking back James realised how close he’d come to losing control like Alec had, how close he’d come to self-destructing.

And Q.  He’d suffered so terribly at the hands of Tiago and yet with James’s support he’d started to heal, almost from the moment they met.  He was unrecognisable now as the poor pathetic bedraggled mess James had first met.  He was confident, sarcastic and adored his work.  He’d taken up martial arts and was now fighting fit, running daily to keep in top shape.  He was popular with most of the staff in his department.  There was always going to be the odd cretin who thought that felins should remain collared but they were the same idiots who raised an eyebrow at a retired Double-0 agent choosing one as a partner.  Q didn’t pay them any mind and told James on several occasions that if they didn’t like it, they could go fuck themselves.   Q had excelled at his work and been promoted to Head of Special Projects in the weapons division of Tech Services.  There was a rumour that Beaumont was thinking of taking early retirement and that Q was being groomed as his successor as the head of the whole branch and honestly, James was thrilled for him.

Q never ceased to impress him but one thing he was dumbfounded by was his capacity for forgiveness.  Just after they’d spent Christmas with Marnie and Kincade, Q informed James he would be going on a trip to Wales to see Alec.  James insisted on driving him there which was how, a few days later, he ended up watching as his lover sat in deep conversation with his former friend.  He sat at the other end of the day room, too far away to hear what was said but as he drove them home again, Q thanked James for taking him.

“I think he’s getting better.  And I think he deserves it.  Despite everything, he’s a good man.”

James had wanted to argue that Alec deserved nothing after trying to rape Q but something had stopped him.  There was a time when he and Alec weren’t so different before circumstances had shaped them both.  Maybe Q was right after all.  It certainly made it less of a surprise when Alec was able to return to active duty a few months afterwards.  Or when he cornered James in the locker room of the fitness suite to apologise.

“I’m still not expecting forgiveness,” He’d said, “But I’d like to apologise again without making excuses for myself this time.  What I did was wrong.  I was out of control.”

For Q’s sake, more than anything, James had shaken his hand when he offered it and a week later he’d given him technical support whilst on a difficult mission in Sepang.  He still hadn’t forgiven Alec but had they proved they could work together, which was a start.

The other thing that had turned out well was that agents who had been there the day that Tiago made his move had managed to capture the two men who’d been with him.  Without their boss to protect them, they had been particularly cooperative and the information they’d given MI6 had enabled them to take down a sizable part of the criminal network Tiago had created.

The shadow was finally gone from Q’s life.  From both of their lives.

~00Q~

James let himself into their house and paused as he heard the shower running upstairs.  They’d moved in six months before and they both loved the new house.  It had three bedrooms, one they used, one they kept as a spare and one which had been converted into a workshop for Q.  The kitchen had been knocked through to the dining room and in the bathroom the shower had been custom-designed for them.  James had a hard time keeping Q out of it on occasion as he indulged his felin passion for cleanliness.   

James went through to their bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed, stripping off his shirt. The gym he’d been at was quite literally a five-minute walk from their house and he much preferred to get changed and showered at home after a session.  He was just removing the boxing wraps from his hands when he heard the shower turn off.    A moment later he felt the edge of the bed dip.  Q’s warm, damp hands smoothed over his shoulders and down his arms until he was fully draped over him.  Q kissed his ear and James grinned.

“Hello pussycat.”

“Hello monkey man.  Where were you?  You were gone when I woke up.”

James couldn’t see Q’s face but he could hear the pout.

“You were out for the count my lovely.  I thought I’d pop down the gym for an hour while you slept in.”

Q sniffed up the side of James’s neck.

“I can think of a much better way for you to burn calories.”  He groused.  “Have you been fighting?  You smell like you’ve been fighting…”

“Sparring kitten.  Just sparring.”

“You smell wonderful anyway.  All sweaty.”

James chuckled as Q started to lick the sweat from the side of his neck.  He leaned back to let Q claim his mouth in a lazy kiss as he let the last of the wrappings fall to the floor.  He reached up behind Q’s head and buried his fingers in his damp hair as they kissed.  His fingers brushed against something and he turned to get a better look.  “You’re wearing your old collar?”

Q shrugged and ran his fingers over the disk that hung off it.

_Property of James Bond_

“You know I like it,” Q said, squirming into James’s lap.  James ran his hand up his naked chest.  “It makes me feel like I’m still yours.”

He slid his hand around to Q’s back and grabbed the back of the collar, tugging on it gently until it tightened across the front of his throat.

“You _are_ still mine,” he growled playfully, kissing under his jaw before adding softly, “every bit as much as I’m yours.  I think sometimes that I should be the one wearing the collar...”  He reached down and cupped Q’s buttocks with both hands. “My beautiful boy.”  He kissed the side of his mouth.

It had taken them a good long while before James had been finally able to touch and make love to Q the way that Q wanted.  In the early days of trying, despite his eagerness and James’s gentleness, intimate touches still made Q tense up and James had realised that any attempts he made to fuck him would just end up hurting him.  In the end James had taken Q back to ‘Intimate Delights’ and embarrassed the hell out of him by buying him a selection of toys in various sizes.  He’d encouraged Q to play with them on his own, without the pressure of wanting to ‘perform’ for James and told him he would wait until he was ready.  He’d also told him that if he was never ready, that was alright too.  He loved him too much to risk hurting him.

It was only a few weeks later that Q had cornered James in the kitchen of all places, bending naked over the breakfast bar and begging James to take him.  He’d been playing with the toys and felt ready, he said.   Despite the absurd location for his first time, James had done as he’d asked, feeling an enormous surge of love for Q as he’d managed to take all of him in painlessly for the first time. Q was insatiable once they got the hang of it and had recently taken great delight in making James feel very, very old with his constant demands…

James ran his hands over Q’s arse as they kissed and when his fingers felt something unusual he pulled back.  There was a hole the size of a pound coin near the central seam.

“Why are you wearing these tatty old things?”    He asked as he wiggled his finger into the hole, to tickle the side of Q’s bollock.  Sans underwear.  He liked it.  Q burst out laughing at the tickling and tried to jerk away so James wrapped his other arm around his waist and playfully did it again.  Q was wearing the old jogging bottoms that he’d been given on the day they met.  Not the best quality in the first place, they had worn badly.  James slid his thumb into the little hole along with his finger and forced them apart, easily tearing the threadbare material.  He lightly pinched a tuft of the fur he found in there and tugged on it.

“You fucker!” Q shrieked with laughter, scrabbling to pinch James’s nipples in retaliation.

James abruptly stood up and threw Q back onto the bed.  He crawled on after him and grabbed the two sides of the tear and pulled, ripping open the material and exposing Q.  He dropped his head and licked a broad stripe up his cock.

“Oh.  Oh _oh!”_ Q gasped, stretching out to slip his hands around the ornate scrolled metal of their headboard.  “Oh God James.  That feels good.”

“Q?”

“Hmm?”

“Don’t let go.”

He laughed at Q’s delighted squeal as he grasped a buttock in each hand and pushed them apart to lick him again.  This never got old.  Pleasuring his partner like this.  He smoothed his hands up Q’s thighs, spreading them wide as he settled down to rim him properly.  It was a sign of Q’s utter relaxation as to how quickly his arsehole loosened under James’s assault.  Within a couple of minutes James was able to push his tongue in, alternating between stabbing darts and long slow wet kisses.  Q moaned as James pushed a finger inside him and moved up to lap at the head of his cock.  He sat up and grabbed Q’s hips, rolling him and dragging his ruined trousers off him.  Grabbing the base of his tail he lifted it and kissed underneath it.

“Oh God… oh please…”

Q bowed his back and pushed his arse up into James’s face.  He stopped what he was doing to bite one of his buttocks.

“Greedy kitty.”  He grinned, kissing the red mark and then trailing his tongue back to Q’s arsehole.  Unable to wait another minute James reached down and undid his flies and pulled out his cock.  Stroking it a couple of times he shuffled up the bed and pushed it into the valley of Q’s arse cheeks until the head nudged Q’s balls.  They both groaned as James ground up against him, reaching over to the bedside table’s top drawer to grab the lube.

“Jamessss,” Q whined, “I need you inside me!”

The felin wiggled his arse distractingly, tail high in the air as James tried to get the safety seal off the bottle of lube he’d picked up.

“Godamnit!  Why the _hell_ did I pick up the new bottle?”

He tossed it to one side and pushed his cock up against Q again as he rifled through the drawer for the half-used bottle.  Q started laughing again and he wagged his tail, smacking it into the side of James’s face like a furry metronome.

“Are you going to stick that thing in me now or what?”

James shoved his hips forward, sending Q into the pile of pillows under his face in a gale of giggles.

“Fucking cheeky scamp.  So demanding!  I swear to God.  Ever since I fucked you, it’s like I’m just a life-support system for your favourite toy…”  James groused, grinning from ear-to-ear.  He popped the top off the bottle and squeezed out a handful.  He one-handedly unbuckled his belt and popped the button on his waistband before slathering it over his cock.  “C’mere scamp!”

He pulled Q back up onto his hands before grabbing his hips and pushing into him.  Q gasped, a gorgeous, breathless sound that James adored.  For all his playfulness, James eased in carefully, unwilling to risk hurting Q.  It had taken months of tender lovemaking to get where they were now and James didn’t want to ruin it by going too fast.   James curled over Q, supporting himself on one hand while he wrapped the other lube-slicked hand around Q’s cock.  The felin moaned, bucking his hips in time with James’s gentle thrusts.  They slowly increased their rhythm until James felt the familiar tightening of his balls.  He didn’t want it to be over too soon so he paused for a moment and waited for the feeling to pass.  He closed his eyes and thought about the contents of the fridge and what he needed to order when he did the on-line grocery shopping that night.  How much washing there was to do.  What colour they should paint Q’s office.  Anything and everything mundane he could think of to distract him from his impending orgasm.

Once James had calmed down enough he gripped Q’s collar, encouraging him to straighten his back as he started to thrust again.  This time he sped up his strokes and gripped Q’s cock harder. He could feel how close Q was by the way he whimpered and shifted his hips just so, adding to his channel’s grip perfectly.  For all his attempts to stave off his orgasm, James moaned and sat back on his heels, dragging Q into his lap as he came.  He let go of his collar and slid his hand round Q’s body, pressing it to Q’s chest and pulling him flush as he sobbed, shuddering and pressing kisses just below the line of his collar.

Once he’d calmed he kept Q close to him and started to stroke him again, bumping his hips to give Q one last moment of pleasure from his cock before it softened.  His lover whined and then reached up to run his fingers through James’s hair as his other hand gripped his thigh.

“Look darling…”

James opened his eyes at Q's words and realised they’d ended up facing the mirrored doors of the wardrobe.  Q looked debauched, his face and shoulders pink from their exertion.  His body was stretched taut, still impaled on James’s cock, arching back into his kisses.  From between their bodies his tail rose, moving sinuously, contentedly.  His red-headed cock stood proud, peeking over the top of James fist on every downwards stroke.

“You are so beautiful.”  James whispered. “Will you come for me, my beautiful boy?”

Q nodded as James closed his fist tightly over the head of his cock.  He watched as Q fought the urge to thrash.  Instead his grip on James's thigh tightened and his thighs trembled.  When he started to come, he turned his face into his shoulder as if suddenly shy.  His abdomen tightened just before his cock jumped in James’s hand and his seed spurted.  His clenched muscles finally expelled James’s cock from his body and it was all he could do to keep stroking and supporting Q as he shivered through his ecstasy.  When his tremors abated James wrapped both arms around him and held him close.

James watched them in the mirror.  Q’s eyes were closed now and he dozed, his head still resting to one side.  James knew that he would wake up soon enough though.  Then he would demand another shower and breakfast and then a walk or time to himself inventing or simply suggest they spend the rest of their day off lazing in bed.  James knew that whatever Q wanted he would get it.  James just couldn’t say no to him - he had no desire to really.  He kissed his neck, smelling the soft, clean scent of his sweat and the earthy tones of the leather collar.  This truly was happiness.  He tightened his arms around Q, holding him close and burrowing his face into his wild curls until he reached his soft silky ear which twitched under his kisses.

His Q.

His everything.

His darling, darling Blacktail.

 

_~fin~_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you if you made it this far!
> 
> I had SO much fun writing this, I can't even tell you. Thanks go again to Only_1_Truth for the wonderful inspirational artwork and also, I guess, my brain. This was SUPPOSED to be a pwp one-shot (which basically turned into the epilogue) but then I started to wonder who and what Q was...
> 
> Anyway! I'm finally allowing myself to reply to comments again as I can't possibly give anything away now (unless I decide to write a sequel...) so comment away, if you'd like to and thank you for all the cheerleading and support. x

**Author's Note:**

> As always, if you'd like to join me, I'm still doing my thing over at iambid.tumblr.com. Flailing over cute kitties, hot actors and men who, in all likelihood, are displaying a bit more flesh than their mother's would approve of.


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